Chapter 20

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The car ride home wasn't nearly as pleasant as the one there. I'd been trying to look past Whitney's comment about the drunken kiss, but it was obviously still uncomfortable between us.

I'd get over it eventually, and I knew I had to. If nothing else could happen, I at least wanted to be able to be friends. We had fun together.

Would being her friend and nothing more kill me eventually? Probably, but it was better than nothing at this point.

The drive seemed like it took twice as long, even though we did end up talking a little bit. After what seemed like forever, we finally pulled back up to the parking lot outside of Whitney's office.

It was the middle of the day, so there were a decent number of people walking around on campus.

I got out of the car and walked back to the trunk to get my bag, when I heard someone walking up behind me.

"Thought you said this wasn't your new piece of ass," McKenzie said.

Just the person I wanted to see, this day couldn't get any better.

"That's not what this is," Whitney said firmly as she walked up next to me.

"I'll take care of this," I said quietly before facing McKenzie.

"This is my professor, I'm her TA, we were at a fucking conference McKenzie," I snapped, "anything else you need to know or are you done being a nosy bitch?"

"Do you really think I believe that?" McKenzie asked.

"I don't really fucking care," I said with a sigh, "go ask my advisor, go ask her boss, I don't give a shit, that's all this is."

It pained me slightly to say that out loud, but it was true.

"Yeah we'll see about that," she said snidely.

"Go do your research and let me know what you find, yeah?" I said sarcastically.

"Mhm, I will," she responded before she walked off.

"God she's the fucking worst," I muttered under my breath, "hasn't been able to stand the fact that I won't sleep with her any more."

I heard Whitney stifle a laugh beside me, and I looked over at her.

"I'm not kidding," I said, "she always tries to start shit with whoever she thinks I'm with."

"No I believe you," Whitney said with a grin, "it's just a little bit funny."

"Yeah for you maybe," I said as I rolled my eyes, "anyway I need to get home, thanks for driving."

"Sure, see you for our meeting this week?" She asked.

"Yeah," I sighed, "I'll be there."

I walked away and towards my apartment, still feeling frustrated at everything that had happened this morning. Our fun weekend together had gone downhill way too quickly.

I felt like it was my fault, but I knew the blame wasn't totally on me. Whitney could've stopped that kiss as soon as I backed away and apologized...but she didn't.

As I got closer to home, I debated on how much I wanted to tell Kaia and Gabbie. I usually told them everything, but Gabbie was the only one that knew that I might have feelings for Whitney. I wasn't sure if I wanted to bring Kaia into this mess or not.

"There she is," Kaia said as I walked in the door, "feeling smarter?"

"Sure," I said with a small laugh, "something like that."

"Did it go okay?" Gabbie asked, "because you um, you don't look like it went okay."

Carson was over, and my eyes quickly flitted over to him and back to Gabbie before I answered. Not that I didn't trust Carson, but this wasn't something I really wanted to talk about with him here.

"Yeah, it went fine," I said, "I'm just pretty tired, I'm going to go unpack and rest."

"I can take off if you guys need to talk," Carson said.

"No, you're totally fine," I said as I waved my hand dismissively, "you don't have to go anywhere."

"Okay, just let me know if you need me to leave," he said.

"Thanks," I said as I forced a smile and walked back to my room.

He was too nice for his own good sometimes.

I started to unpack my things when I heard my phone go off. I picked it up to find a text from Tanner.

Fuck, I still had to deal with Tanner.

"Hey, you back in town?" He asked.

It was pretty evident that I needed to rip the bandaid off and break up with him, but I didn't know if it would look bad to do it right when I got back from my trip with Whitney. It might, but I really wanted to get it over with.

"Yeah, just got back. Do you want to meet up in a little bit?" I sent back to him.

"Yeah let's go get coffee in a few hours," he said.

"Sounds good, meet you there about 2:00," I responded.

Guess I was going to get this over with sooner rather than later.

                                       ***

I went back out to the living room a couple of hours later, and it looked like Carson had gone home.

"You want to talk now?" Gabbie asked me.

"No, sorry," I said, "I'm going to meet up with Tanner, but I'll fill you guys in on everything when I get back."

"Okay..." Gabbie said as her and Kaia both gave me a strange look.

They obviously both knew that something was going on, but I needed to go.

I drove to the coffee shop that Tanner and I always went to, and I found a table in the back once I got there. He came in a few minutes later and I stood up as he walked back to me.

"Hey babe," he said as he gave me a hug.

Damn it Tanner, don't get all cute on me now.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"You talk your professor into having a threesome with us yet?" He asked.

There was the Tanner I was used to.

"Shut up," I said as I hit his stomach, "let's go get something to drink."

We walked up to the counter and ordered our drinks. I insisted on paying for mine when Tanner tried to buy them both. I felt too guilty getting a free drink when I was about to break up with him.

I didn't think that either of us had ever taken this relationship that seriously, we'd both just been having fun, but I still was worried about how he'd react.

We got back to the table and I started to sip on my iced coffee, trying to figure out the best way to go about this.

"Okay," I finally sighed, "I need to talk to you about something."

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