I didn't give you my consent | Station 19

20 - Coffee at Grey Sloan

TW: Self-harm, Rape...

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Carina walked down the stairs past the front desk and was approached by Sullivan, who was silently working on paperwork:

"Hey, everything okay? Where are you going, I thought you were staying with Mila? Is she alright?"

Carina cleared her throat and was quite scattered and still had a few tears in her eyes from the phone call and stress:

"Oh... hi, yeah... I'm fine, I'm just meeting Miranda at the hospital for a bit but I will be right back, Mila won't wake up for a few hours anyway so..."

Maya and Vic walked through the door together, followed by Andy, and Maya looked worried and sadly into her wife's watery eyes:

"Heyyy, Carina... What's going on, are you alright?"

Maya took Carina by the shoulders and looked at her with concern, asking her why she looked like she had been crying.

Carina shook her head and tried to smile:

"Everything's okay, I just need to clear my head a bit. I made a plan to meet Miranda for coffee and a chat. We want to come back here together afterwards to wake Mila up."

Maya immediately understood that Carina needed a little time for herself and gave her deeply loved wife a big and warm hug:

"Okay... I understand no need to explain anything just remember I love you! AND text me when you get to the hospital!"

Carina looked at Vic and Andy's worried faces and pulled Maya tighter against her:

"Love you too and I will..."

Carina separated from Maya and walked towards the door with final instructions to the others:

"See you in a bit and please have a peek at Mila from time to time. Just to make sure everything is really okay!"

The others assured Carina that they would keep an eye on Mila and also said their goodbyes.

Carina walked out of the station through the forecourt and looked further down the street. She had found Mila there yesterday and now she would probably see the man who had committed the cruel and horrible crime...

She shook her head sadly and walked in the other direction down the street to Grey Sloan. With every step she seemed to pick up speed and had to slow herself down to make sure she was calming down a little. 

When she finally arrived at the Grey Sloan's property, she breathed a sigh of relief. She had found a little peace and she would finally be able to talk to Miranda in a bit. All this meant that she would finally no longer be so alone in her worries.

She made her way through the hospital corridors to the nearest possible nurse and immediately paged Miranda.

It wasn't long before Miranda appeared and looked at Carina with a warm and welcoming smile:

"Heyyy, glad to see you!"

Carina had to return Miranda's smile, it had raised so much hope in her and immediately relieved some stress:

"Heyyy, thanks for allowing me to come over..."

-

"Ahh, Don't be a fool Carina, you can always come over when you are off work! Regardless of what's going on you're always welcome here! You know that"

Miranda gave Carina a quick welcome hug and led her to her office, where they would be able to talk in complete privacy:

"I've already got coffee ready in my office, I suppose it would be better if we don't talk in the cantine, right?"

Carina nodded and after a short walk they entered the small but cozy office with a pot of coffee and two cups on the table.

They both sat down and Miranda filled both of their cups with coffee.

Carina sat across from Miranda, clutching her coffee cup like a lifeline. The weight of Mila's situation bore heavily on her, and Miranda could see it in her eyes.

"Sooo... How are you doing, Carina?"

Miranda asked gently, her voice filled with slight concern.

Carina sighed, taking a sip of her coffee:

"It's been rough. Seeing Mila go through this... it just brings up so many emotions. She's so young and has already endured so much. I just want to relieve her from all this pain..."

Miranda nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation:

"We are already doing everything that is in our power right now. This is beyond what you or the two of us could handle alone... you know that. She has so many people around her wanting to help her, the whole 19, you, me and other Grey Sloan doctors"

Carina's eyes were filled with worry:

"Yeah, I know... I even already called Diane. She agreed to come by later to talk to Mila. But the self-harm... I must address it beforehand and I don't know how without making things worse."

Miranda reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Carina's:

"Sometimes, just being there and offering support is the most important thing. If you want we can talk to her together, or I can even do it alone if you prefer."

Carina nodded, appreciating the support:

"Thank you, Miranda, I think we should actually talk to her together."

Miranda nodded and Carina continued:

"It's just so incredibly hard to see someone so young go through the same trauma."

Miranda squeezed Carina's hand:

"You're providing so much stability and care, which is exactly what Mila needs right now. We'll get through this together and she'll be fine. And I'm going to be here for you if it becomes too much or if there is anything you want to talk about!"

They sat in silence for a moment, drawing strength from each other's presence.

Finally, Miranda spoke up:

"When we get back to the station, let's sit down with Mila and make sure she knows she's not alone. We can create a plan for her support and recovery. We did this before so we can do it again!"

Carina felt a little relieved:

"Yes. We'll take it one step at a time..."

-

"Exactly. One step at a time."

-

"Thank you for being here, Miranda."

Miranda smiled softly:

"Always. We're a team... a family and we look out for each other. And Mila has been like an unofficial foster child for Ben and me for years, if we're honest"

Carina laughed a little, Miranda was right:

"You and Ben were the family she never had but always needed."

-

"And you always were something like a big sister or aunt to her. She always appreciates you so very much Carina, the trust she has in you is very special and that says a lot about you... You are a very very loving and great person Carina, don't forget that!"

Carina felt flattered and smiled warmly into Miranda's face. Miranda also looked at her with a smile and for a brief moment they just enjoyed the silence and love inside the office before They came to the next topic:

The potential rapist who was lying here in the hospital.

Both of them drank from their coffee cups and after a few minutes of relatively relaxed small talk about current topics in the hospital to calm down.
They came across a strange case from three weeks ago they had in the emergency room that made them think about the man Miranda found there yesterday.

They sat in silence for a few seconds.

Carina first asked Miranda about the man after they made it clear through eye contact that they were thinking about the same thing:

"So speaking of the emergency room... Do you have any news from the police regarding the unconscious man?"