My daughter -The Rookie

3- Order, arms

Without saying anything, we drove to the address, John and some other officers were already there. I was just staring out the window the whole time, thinking about what could have happened. I hesitated about getting out of the car. There were a couple other police cars in the street and driveway and there were more coming. I opened the door with a big sigh. I felt the tears welling up in my eyes while Tim and I walked towards the back yard. We got through the gate and there she was. I saw John with her head on his knees. 'It was Cole.' I heard him say to Grey. His voice, far, far away. A tear fell on the floor in front of me. We walked a bit closer and I felt my heart fighting against me. My mind wanted to see her, look her in her eyes but my heart didn't. My heart didn't want me to see her, to protect me from the long term effects this could have. I stared at the ground while we walked over. I started shaking a little. My world fell apart when I saw her. It really happened. Cole killed my mom. My head started pounding so I closed my eyes for a moment, but that only made it worse. I opened them again and walked back to the shop. I held myself up by leaning on the car as I tried to control the feeling of spinning.

It took a couple minutes for me to fully calm down and when I turned around I saw Tim walking up to me. 'Are you okay?' You just ran off?' He asked me, nicer than normal. 'Yes, sorry. I got a little dizzy.' I responded, brushing him off. I saw the hesitation on his face, not believing what I said. 'Okay, they're about to take her in the ambulance. Are you coming?' He asked. I could hear the remorse in his voice. It made him sweeter than how he normally was. 'Yes, let's go.' I said. I really didn't want to confront myself with this again but I had to, to honor her.

Every cop from our department who was on the clock was here to honor their captain. The woman who died fighting for her people, for her country. She died, doing what she loved. I sighed when I saw two lines forming. We joined the left line and there we waited, in silence, for her to roll by, covered by an American flag. I knew it was time when I saw Grey, coming from the back yard. He stood next to me. Grey on my right and Tim on my left made me feel a little less alone and a little more protected. I heard the sounds of a card rolling over the tiles. 'Officers, order arms!' Grey said, loudly, so everyone could hear it. And then she came. The black card with the American flag and a body underneath. I tried to swallow away the pain but it didn't work. She rolled by and I tried to keep my eyes away from it. It's tradition to stare out in front of you but I couldn't keep my eyes off it. 'Officers, execute arms.' Grey said and I lowered my arm again. 'I'm so sorry.' I heard John say as she got loaded into the bus. I flinched a little when the door closed. I saw Tim staring at me from the corner of my eye. I just stared at the ground and tried to swallow again when I heard the bus drive away, but the pain was stuck in my throat and made me feel like throwing up.