Good Cop Gone Bad ~ Rewritten

46| shattered

•Matteo Rossi•

        I watched her leave. She asked me not to go after her, I still tried but I had to watch her leave. In just a few moments, I had broken my own heart by finally admitting to her what I should have admitted months ago.
        I stood there in complete disbelief, my face was wet with something unfamiliar to me, until her. I had no clue what to do. Without her I was stuck, not sure how to fully continue life. She is my every thought, night and day, she makes breathing easier.
        I went upstairs, no clue what else to do. Even now, I could hear the sobs escaping me, but every room had her in every inch, every corner. Her sweet scent filled the entire house, the reminders of her everywhere. In our room, the sheets, our closet, our bathroom. The backyard, the garden, her greenhouse, her sunroom, everything had her in it. My clothes smell like her, there were lipstick stains in the form of kisses on my white dress shirt that was hung on the couch in our room.
The same couch where I held her after her horrible mother called her just to berate her. Aria deserves so much more than she gives herself credit for.
I grabbed a sweatshirt of hers, looking at it, not knowing what to do. I stared at it and cried until I couldn't anymore. I had no clue what to do. I sat at the couch looking at the sweatshirt and the paper with pen on the table. I grabbed both and began writing.
My phone rang and I looked at the caller ID. It was Alessandro. I don't know if I have the mental capacity to deal with him at this moment.
"What do you want?" I asked him when I answered the phone.
"Where the fuck are you?" he asked, his voice coming out very confused.
"In my room," I said very confused. Seconds later, the door to my room opened to reveal Aless and Sofia looking for me. "What are you doing here?" I ask them. My voice sounds stuffy as a result of my crying.
Alessandro hugs me but I do not reciprocate. "Laura called. She said Aria called her and asked her to bring her stuff to the apartment, so we assumed you had told her." Sofia says, while Aless is still holding onto me.
I pry him off of me and he looks at me weirdly. Then, he calls out for Vittoria who comes running into the room and jumps on me. I catch her and hold her to me. "Hi Zio!" she says excitedly.
"Hi tesoro," I reply. She wiggles so I put her down and she runs back out of the room to go play with something. Then I notice it. Bean. At the sight of the cat she rescued, I can feel something weird in my throat and I think I am about to cry again but I hold it back.
Just then, Laura comes in too. "Hey," she says casually.
"I assume you're here to collect Aria's things?" I ask her, but she laughs and shakes her head. "What do you mean no?"
She shakes her head, "She's being stupid. I know you make her happy, but our fucking mom just messed her up so bad. She's scared that if people find out, she will lose her job and that's the only things she has that at the very least keeps her satisfied. Not only that, but our mom herself has said that Aria doesn't deserve this, that she doesn't deserve to be happy. I think she has heard it so much that she believes it. So she leaves her happy place and sticks with something that makes her miserable because that's all she thinks she deserves. She's settling." Laura explains to us. It makes complete sense and I hate that it does.
She deserves every kiss, every 'I love you', every hug, every smile, every flower, every gift. She deserves all of it. I just wish she could see herself through my perspective so she could know that.
"So you're not taking her stuff?" Sofia asks her. Laura shakes her head. "I'll take it then."
"Why?" Laura asks her, her voice coming out harsh.
Sofia sighs, placing her hands over her pregnant belly. "Well it's not like it will be gone forever. I'm willing to bet money that she will be back by Christmas. And either way if she wants to remove her things from here, she's the one that is going to have to put them back." her explanation was quite funny.
Laura leaves, taking the letter that I wrote earlier with her. Twenty minutes later, Aless, Sofia, and I were all seated on the couches in the room, still talking about it. I had let a few tears slip but I hid them the best I could.
Sofias phone starts ringing and she answers it, and through the phone I can hear Aria's voice. Her voice is broken, the evidence of crying unmistakable.
I couldn't help but hate myself for what I had done. She probably hates me now, but I will do whatever it takes to get her back. No matter what it takes.
Not half an hour later, Sofia and Alessandro were leaving with a box full of her stuff. They even took Bean. But what hurt the most was that all the things I bought her stayed. I had to stare at every remaining piece of her in our home after I had to watch her walk away because of how much of an idiot I am.

•••••

I had spent most of the last few days in our room or Aria's sunroom. Either drinking or smoking a cigar. It was almost like I forgot how to function without her.
Every morning, she was gone. There was no one to have breakfast with, no one to kiss me goodbye before I left, no one to be excited to come home to, no one to call and text me giving me small updates of their day throughout it.
And I did not just want that with anyone, I wanted it with her. I need her. If it's not her it's no one. Our relationship was not exactly perfect. We had both let our pasts get to us in certain moments, but what was so amazing about it was that we understood each other. We were patient about it, we never got angry, we talked, we waited, we held each other. Was that too much to ask for?
Had I been right all those months back before I met her? Someone of my livelihood would never be able to keep someone like her. I supposedly do nothing but harm people, how could someone like that keep someone like her?
As I feel my eyes swell with tears once more, I get a call from Alessandro. "We got a letter from someone. Someone our family has not associated with in over thirty years. And they are offering help." he said skeptically.
        "Well, who is it?" I asked.
        "Lev Ivanov." he says so casually, but it is a shock to my system.
        Lev Ivanov as in the leader of the Russian. Who our family has refused to do business with since even before I was born. "What does he want?" I ask.
        "He has a list of everyone involved in La Prossima Generazione. He says he can help us but in return you need to offer an alliance with him." He explained to me cautiously.
       After thinking about it fit bit even a minute, I had made my decision. "Let's do it," I said.

•••••

       We stood by the airstrip as Lev Ivanov's plane just barely landed. After contacting him, he decided he could fly out that same day.
        We shook hands and he introduced me to everyone on his side which were only three people. I did the same but only Aless and Rafi were with me. Rafi basically lives in Italy now.
       I think that resolving this issue is good for me. It's not that I am in denial, I just know that there is no way Aria and I are just not getting back together, so I just don't think of it as we are broken up, and resolving this issue before it turns worse keeps her safe. And that is all that matters.
       Lev introduces us to his daughter Inessa, his wife Anya, and his brother Ivan. "I trust that they will be safe and protected our entire time here?" he asks, referring to his wife and daughter.
       I nod, "Of course they will," I reply as we begin to head to the cars, on our way back to my estate.
       Just then, I got a call from one of my men. "Capo, we got the DeMarco, all of the men of the family." he says.
       "Perfect timing," I tell him, smiling. "Bring them to the estate." I hang up on him.
        "What was that?" I am asked by Lev.
       "They got the DeMarco men." I say.

•••••

bye bye

~elle 🌸