My Co-Worker is an Elf Girl?! (#thewattys2024)

Chapter 15 - Whatever Happened to Fellowship?!

HOKIEN OFFICE CAFETERIA - DAY
Samara has heard of an elf girl at a nearby table. She is surrounded by a cohort of Simps who are presenting her the finest fare harvested from the Hokien Media canteen. Remy is in the middle of shoveling a spoonful of overnight oats into her face.

REMY: "Our heroine has not been in the Human World for long, yet she is welcomed with open arms! This campaign is going well!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "Just leave the entire project to us, Lady Remy! In the meantime, enjoy your stay in the Human World!"

SAMARA: "Don't tell me you actually believe she is a real elf."

Samara now has the attention of Remy and her following of sycophants.

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #2: "Hey! Don't besmirch Lady Remy like that!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #3: "If you do not have business with Lady Remy, then you should go elsewhere!"

Samara notices that Simping Employee #3 is not wearing the same bright pink ID badges as the others.

SAMARA: "You! You're not in the Marketing Competition! You're a full-time employee! What are you even doing here?!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #3: "I just wanted to be part of something bigger than myself."

SAMARA: "She's clearly a cosplayer committing an extraordinary amount of effort into a bit. Are you all so touch-starved that you're indulging her like this?"

REMY: "This is not an extraordinary amount of commitment to a bit! I am a real elf!"

SAMARA: "Alright, 'Lady Remy.' Prove it."

Silence falls upon the table.

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "Lady Remy has absolutely nothing to prove to the likes of you!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #2: "Yeah, she doesn't have to!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #3: "....even if it would be really cool if she did!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #4: "...as our loyalty to her depends on it!"

The Simping Employees turn to Remy.

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "Proving this ruffian wrong would be a trifling matter to you, right Lady Remy?"

Remy returns a blank stare.

REMY: "Uh....."

SAMARA: "I got a fool-proof way for ya."

Samara reaches over to Remy and starts yanking at her pointy ears and her cotton candy-colored hair.

REMY: "AGHHHHH!!! What are you doing?! Stop this at once!!"

Remy's fanatic band shoves Samara off of her.

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "You've gone too far! That wasn't necessary at all!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #2: "There are plenty of other ways for her to prove that she's truly an elf!"

They all turn toward her. Samara cracks a smug grin.

REMY: ".....like how...?"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #3: "Like using magic!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #4: "Yes! Show us your magical prowess, Lady Remy!"

Remy is at a loss for words. She grows sullen.

REMY: "I uh.... don't really know magic...."

SAMARA: "I thought you said you were an elf...."

Remy gets adorably flustered.

REMY: "I never said I was a good one, okay!!""

Samara lets out a smug, hearty laugh.

SAMARA: "Your move, you nerds."

Remy's cheer squad has taken a serious blow. They, however, remain undeterred.

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "....It doesn't matter! Remy is real to us!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #2: "Yeah! That's what really counts!"

REMY: "Yeah! These people are my friends and party members! We will not stand for such slander!"

The cogs in Samara's brain begin to turn. An idea bubbles in her head.

SAMARA: "What do you mean by 'friends' Remy?"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #3: "We are her loyal knights!"

SAMARA: "No, no. Let's hear it from Lady Remy herself. What kind of friends are they to you?"

REMY: "...the ones who will stand by your side no matter what!"

SAMARA: "Like a... familial bond?"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #1: "Hey! You're spoon-feeding her lines now!"

REMY: "Yeah, like family!"

SAMARA: "An incestuous family?"

REMY: "What? Ew, no!"

SIMPING EMPLOYEE #2: "How gross! We are a 'found' family, right? The type to consist of many STEP-SIBLINGS with.... no blood relation of which all sorts of possibilities may happen... right?"

SAMARA: "Or are they a bunch of platonic siblings with whom you share no sexual desire and won't ever indulge in degenerate activities with...?"

REMY: "Yeah! A bunch of platonic siblings with whom we share no sexual desire and won't ever indulge in degenerate activities!"

And with that, the Simping Cohort is gone—vanished. There is no sign or sound of them ever leaving.

Remy shrinks.

REMY: "I... see... This is all too familiar to me..."

The elf girl picks herself up. She's changing course.

REMY: "Hey! We're both alone now, right? Maybe we can team up-"

Before Remy could finish her sentence, Samara had already started walking away.

SAMARA: "I'll think about it...."

Remy is left all by herself.

To be continued...