My Co-Worker is an Elf Girl?! (#thewattys2024)

Chapter 33: Do You Accept Payment in Celestial Turds?

CITY OF UR CENTRAL BOOKING WAITING ROOM - LATE  EVENING
Samara is slumped in her waiting room chair. The past few days have taken a toll on her.

The door adjacent to her opens. Out walks a MUTUAL AID LAWYER. She looks like she's 14 hours into an 8-hour workday.

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
Miss Lee...?

Samara jolts her head up.

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
Good news and bad news.

SAMARA
Good news?

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
The good news is that the Border Patrol overstepped its boundaries with your friend. We have lots of experience dealing with this widespread occurrence.

Samara hugs the Mutual Aid Lawyer from her seat, rubbing her head into her torso like a big, fluffy pillow. Despite her delusion-inducing fatigue, Sam lets out a gleeful shout.

SAMARA
Hooray!

Samara doesn't let go. The Mutual Aid Lawyer clears her throat.

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
...don't you want to hear the bad news?

SAMARA
No.

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
No?

SAMARA
No more bad news. Good news only.

The Mutual Aid Lawyer stares blankly at Samara. She goes with the bad news anyway.

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
Um... your friend was never hired by Hokien Media as an Intern. So, each time she entered their property, it counted as an instance of trespassing. She has three misdemeanors on her record.

Samara slowly opens her eyes.

SAMARA
What?

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
Those misdemeanors will make getting a visa tricky, but we can work on that later! She'll be kept there for the next two days until her trial. Keep in touch!

The Mutual Aid Lawyer begins to leave. She whips out her phone to look up the details of her next appointment.

SAMARA
Wait! So you can't get my friend out today?

MUTUAL AID LAWYER
Only if you can pay her $4,000 bail.

Samara pulls out her wallet and thumbs through its pockets. There is no cash. Society has been tap-to-pay for a while, so she hasn't carried any in years.

Sam pulls out her well-worn, black credit card. She runs her finger over the name of the person to whom this card was issued: "Samuel Lee." Over the years, the friction of her pulling it in and out of her wallet has partially eroded the silver paint covering the embossed name. Perhaps in time, the last half of her dad's first name will rub off to resemble hers more.

Samara gazes at it, deep in thought.

CENTRAL BOOKING VISITOR'S CENTER - DAY

The Central Booking visitor center is a drab room painted thickly in a yellow color not unlike that of stale mayonnaise. Its layout is reminiscent of a bank teller's wall lifted from some impoverished nation. If you stayed in this room long enough, you could get high off the paint's vapors.

The room is packed with prisoners who have been given their allotted time with lawyers, loved ones, or free-wandering accomplices from the outside world.

Lt. Leonard Connor (disguised as a regular prison guard) leads Remy into the visitor's center. He gestures at an open booth for the elf to sit in. Remy's eyes glisten at the sight of the room.

REMY
Oh my god! Am I being visited in prison? It's just like in the campaign of Andy the Framed! A poor human who was wrongfully convicted of his wife's lover's murder!

A visual of the theater poster of "The Shawshank Redemption" floats in the elf's mind.

Remy's eyes land on a seated Samara. Her enthusiasm for seeing her human friend is noticeably muted in comparison.

REMY
Oh, hey, Sam!

Samara grips the booth's microphone tightly.

SAMARA
Remy! Are you okay?!

REMY
Been better, I guess?

Samara notices a splotch of blood on Remy's prison outfit. It's precisely where Lady Fairlight cut her in their duel.

SAMARA
What is that on your side? You're hurt! Remy, you've only been in prison for a few hours. How the hell did you get stabbed already?

REMY
I picked a fight with the strongest person here. It's what you're supposed to do in human prison.

SAMARA
Did you win?

Remy averts Samara's gaze.

REMY
No... no, I didn't...

To be continued...