Chanakyan's love

Thirty three

Chanakyan

I was disappointed in myself.

...I could still hear her aggravated screams in my ear and it was killing me from inside. If her call didn't wake me at the right time, what would have happened!? It sends chills down my spine to speculate the horror that might have unfolded If I hadn't risen from the temporary unconscious state.

Even though I'm relieved that my Gowthami is safe and well, I'm ashamed to face her. She's physically fine but mentally, she's far from normal. She's still seated next to the dead body of Gurumurthy, torpidly.

I'm concerned but I couldn't move myself to console her.

Behind us, the battle is still ongoing but it's not hard to notice that we're leading and we would win.

"Gowthami!!" Amma runs to her Gowthami and wraps her within her hold but she yields no reaction from her daughter. She's as unreactive as a statue. It was difficult to watch her being emotionless. My chest ached and as I took a step toward her, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

Turning back, I was met with Ayya's exhausted and broken self. His eyes are lowered and he, with great hesitance, brings it up and regards me calmly. He pats the back of my shoulder twice and stands next to me, watching the scene of his wife trying to relax his daughter.

Amma shakes her by her arms and taps at her cheeks but she doesn't say anything. Gowthami sat benumbed...

I bowed my head down, unable to behold her in such a shape.

"...when you take up my position, try not to get into violence. Avoid it as much as possible. And protect my daughter as you did now," I raise my head and stare in quiet surprise. "Let's leave this here. It's me, the reason behind all of this. My family and my men, they have done nothing wrong to suffer..." His eyes once washes over our men, Hari, Shakthi, and others, who were severely injured and are now being rescued by our fellow men.

"This has to stop here, Chanakya. Let's close it off, once and for all. This will be our last war," He gazes at me expectantly and I nod back at him.

"Ennanga...(Husband)" Amma cries and rushes to Ayya's arms, affected by her daughter's void of emotions. Sighing a breath out, I shuffle toward my Gowthami and squat next to her.

"Gowthami...wail, let your burden off your heart, it's okay, it has ended," a tear slides down her cheeks, marking the start of an unending flow of emotions...

She wept, louder and harder and I buried her in my arms, trying to support her as much as I could.

It was a long time before she relaxed and slumped against me. By now, the conflict has been resolved. We've successfully defeated our opposition.

"Get her inside, Chanakya," Amma states softly and I silently pick my Gowthami off the ground and carry her towards the house. As I pass Ayya, he offers me an assuring nod, impliedly ensuring that he will look after the remnants of this fight.

I hope peace remains henceforth.

Peering at Gowthami, I carefully saunter ahead to her room and lay her gently against the mattress. Amma stands on the leg of the bed and smiles a small one when Gowthami grasps my hand, still in her almost fainted state.

It thawed my soul and I found myself staying beside her, perching on the edge of the bed.

"I've no words to thank you, Chanakya," Amma, with a sentimental voice, says to me and departs from the room, leaving her daughter under my watch.

I couldn't take my eyes off Gowthami, she was neither slumbering nor fully awake. She needs to refresh first, If not, her body won't let her doze off.

"Gowthami ma, (an endearing term) shall I bath you?" In this condition, I wouldn't want to spare her alone even for a second. "Hm...." She hums weakly and I lift her in my arms to take her to the restroom.

Shutting the door, I make her stand under the shower. But she slants against my chest, refusing to separate from me.

"Gowthami," she produces a throaty line of hum as a response. "Take off your dress ma...you need to refresh," she doesn't shift, instead, pastes herself even more closer to me.

Hence I cautiously pull her saree down and as though my touch burns her, her body jerks and she begins to breathe irregularly. Her eyes begin to let down tears and she mumbles something to herself as she closes her eyelids in fear and backs off, halting when her back hits the wall...

Seeing her state, my heart shatters into little pieces and I, controlling my reckless emotions, advance towards her and clutch her arms rigidly.

"Gowthami! It's me, Chanakya!" Her body cowers under my touch and she denies to open her eyes. "Gowthami ma, look at me...I'm Chanakya...your Chanakya..." I feel my voice wavering as pain overtakes my heart.

Seconds later, Gowthami unseals her eyelids and once she rakes her view on me, she hugs me, tightly and shares her agony with me through her tears...

"Gowthami ma, he's dead. No one will harm you anymore. I'll take care of you," I say with determination and Gowthami peels herself off me and perks up at me longingly.

"Please do," Her hoarse and meek voice has me spot a kiss against her forehead. My hands cushion her cheeks and I, with her permission, unwrap her off the clothes.

Once she stands naked in front of me,  the air thickens.
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