Chanakyan's love

Thirty four

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Gowthami

I won't be able to entertain it If he were to touch me...but contradicting my assumption, he just turns the shower on and lets the water wash over me. He's calm and doesn't lower his eyes down my face.

"I...can bath on my own," I trail off softly and he thinks for a few seconds before jerking his head positively. But then he pauses near the shut door and tips his head in my direction. "Will you be okay on your own?" I wearily nod at him.

"Let the door stay open. I'll be out in the room," he says composedly and unlocks the door, leaving me alone in the restroom.

In his absence, I close my eyes and bask in the slight chillness the water provides my body. I tried my best to not rewind the scenes that had happened a while ago but it was impossible to forget...

It keeps flashing across my mind, reminding me of the hell of the situation that I was stuck in...

Without my knowledge, tears stumble from my eyes, blending with the water as it leaks down my cheeks.

If Chanakya didn't emerge at the right time, what would have occurred to me? It was beyond terrifying to imagine. I clench my shut eyes, striving to get rid of negative thoughts yet I fail miserably in each attempt...

Releasing a frustrated whimper, I scramble my hands through my tresses and hiss when my wrist starts to hurt, quite badly. As I permit my eyes to analyze the aching spot, the memories of the now-dead man, who I murdered with my own hands, appear in my brain.

The scene plays repeatedly in my head, causing me to shiver and sob uncontrollably. I killed him! Aren't I a murderer? Even If he deserves it, do I have the right to take someone's life?

Heeding my cries, Chanakya quickly enters the restroom and doesn't think twice before he embraces me. His aura, it is comforting and I seek refuge within his arms.

My body shuddered with my wailing and I couldn't pinpoint the length of time I utilized to pour out my anguish...

However, eventually, when my cries deteriorated, I found myself tiredly resting my head on Chanakya's shoulder.

"Let's get you out of here, soon," I hear him say before he takes hold of the soap and applies it on my body. His clothes become moderately drenched with the water...and as he rubs the soap on me with such concentration, I couldn't help but admire him quietly. He doesn't have any lustful intentions, I could discern it by the look in his eyes...

They were just intent on smudging my skin with the soap. He spares my breasts and private spot untouched and grazes the cleanser on all other areas.

And as he smears the soap on my face, I join my eyelids together.

Later, when I'm perfectly freshened up, Chanakya walks out of the restroom and re-enters with my towel. He tries to dry me off but I refuse. "It's okay...I will do it, Chanakya..." He doesn't oblige. Instead, goes against my words and caresses the towel everywhere on my body exempting my private regions...

Done with it, he shuffles to my back and drains the water off my hair.

Then he circles the towel around my body and carries me in his arms to the room. Being handled with such kind of gentleness and care has me feeling fluffy inside my chest and I really needed this now...

Chanakya drops me on the edge of the bed and takes out my innerwear from the shelf. I become quite flustered as he places them beside me.

I swiftly attempt to wear them, enduring the pain I feel on my right wrist. Somehow, I successfully wore the panties but I couldn't hook my bra...

Chanakya is rummaging the shelf, searching for my casual clothes while I continue to struggle with hooking the bracery. Jiffies later, I give up and clutch the bra cups to my breasts, awaiting Chanakya to steer his attention to me.

I've worn the towel on my hips and as Chanakya swirls around, I turn my back to him. "I couldn't hook it," he doesn't respond...rather directly goes into fulfilling the task after he tosses the clothes he selected on the bed.

"Done," he blurts out within a few seconds and I impetuously start to put on my clothes. A simple red T-shirt and knee-length shorts it was...

Once dressed up, I swivel to face Chanakya who is removing his wet button-up shirt. He seems exhausted as well. "Run a shower, Chanakya," he stares at me intently, probably wondering If I would be okay alone.

"I'm okay...I'll be okay...go to your home, refresh and rest well Chanakya," he shakes his head.

"No, I'll come back here," I sigh at his response. "I'm truly alright, come in the morning..." I really do feel quite energized now and mentally, even though, I'm not entirely fine, I can handle it.

"Mudiyathu, nan poyitu varen," (No, I'll come back) he presses and offers me a long stare before he exits my room. Within minutes, my mother appears in my room with a glass of milk. I accept it without protest and drink the content slowly.

Amma brushes my wet hair and looks down at me with tearful eyes. "I'm sorry," she apologizes and I stop sipping on the milk. "Why are you apologizing ma? Whatever happened has nothing to do with you or anyone...leave it ma, do not remind it, everything has come to an end," she nods her head busily and attempts to control her emotions.

On the other hand, I again begin to down the milk till the glass goes empty.

"I'm going to sleep ma.." I mutter, forwarding the glass to Amma. "Seri ma," (okay ma) Amma pecks my forehead lovingly and shifts only after I bury my body under the blanket.

She turns the lights off on the way out and shuts the door as she departs.

Sighing, I lay on my left side and my eyelids weigh down heavily, urging me to seal them. As I found myself slipping away into slumber, I pleaded to all gods to not give me any nightmares. I want to sleep, my body and mind requires it but I'm scared. Consciously, I can regulate my thoughts...

However, once I fall into an unconscious state, I can't govern the things I see in my head. I can't disrupt the tricks my brain would play with me when I'm cut off from reality...

Despite being aware of all of the demerits of dozing off now, I still indulge myself in the act.

Hours later...

....my whole being convulsed and I jolt awake from my short-term sleep, affected by the horrific dream I encountered. And before I can comprehend anything, in the dark, a hand encircles my waist and pulls me back. It wasn't hard to guess that it was Chanakya.

He cocoons me into his fresh body and I, willingly paste myself as much as I can to his. There wasn't even a slight gap established between us. We were stuck together and it was soothing...

He has one of his hands under my head while his other has circled my waist.

In this position, his lips stay beside my ear and he, kisses there, very lightly. Then he engulfs me tighter. "Thoongu ma, nan irukaenla, payapadama thoongu," (Sleep ma, I'm here, do not be afraid) he says lowly and I, at that moment, felt his pure love, my Chanakyan's love, in my soul.

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