Chapter 48

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Feng Suige took another step closer, "I've already called the ear-piercing nanny to the mansion, and now you're telling me you won't do it?"

Yixiao immediately pointed to Qin Yi, who was watching from the side, "Xiaoyi doesn't have her ears pierced either."

Qin Yi quickly covered her ears and exclaimed, "I'm not of marriageable age yet, so it's normal for me not to have them pierced!"

"Xiaoyi," Feng Suige suddenly shifted his attention, "do you like white jade earrings?"

Qin Yi hesitated and then lowered her hands, "I do."

"If she still refuses to get her ears pierced," Feng Suige glanced at Yixiao, "then when you come of age, I'll give you her favorite pair of earrings..."

Before he could finish, Yixiao triumphantly pulled out the earrings from her bosom and waved them in front of Feng Suige, "As long as I keep them with me, you won't get them!"

Qin Yi clapped her hands and laughed, "Big sister always puts them down when she goes to bed at night. Brother Feng, you can get them then."

Yixiao's smile froze, and she awkwardly glanced at Feng Suige.

"Xiaoyi!" Feng Suige lightly reprimanded, "Who taught you that? That's really inappropriate!"

Feeling guilty, Qin Yi stuck out her tongue, "I was just joking. Don't tell Grandpa—um, Grandpa has something for me to do today, so I'm off."

She then made a quick bow and darted away.

In the ensuing awkward silence, Feng Suige slowly walked over to Yixiao and called her name gently, making her scalp tingle.

She responded vaguely, "What is it?"

Feng Suige paused for a moment and sighed, "Don't overthink it."

Yixiao turned her face to look at the blood-red roses swaying beside her, "I'm not overthinking—haven't you been sleeping in the library lately?"

"Do you care where I spend the night?" Feng Suige asked with a faint smile.

"No," Yixiao said a bit unnaturally, "you've already done so much for me. In fact, a lot of the time, you don't need to consider my feelings..."

"What are you trying to say?" Feng Suige's expression gradually changed.

Yixiao glanced at him, "Can you not get angry and just listen to me first?"

Feng Suige nodded reluctantly.

Yixiao's gaze drifted into the distance, "I don't mean anything else. I just want to say, don't let my presence affect your original life."

"What do you think you are, and what do you think I am?" Feng Suige interrupted her furiously, "Are you going to tell me this is just a game and has nothing to do with feelings?"

Before he finished speaking, Yixiao didn't even look at him and turned to leave.

Feng Suige quickly stepped forward and grabbed her, "Explain yourself before you go!"

"Feng Suige," Yixiao gritted her teeth, struggling to break free but failing, "I'm telling you, if you don't want to argue, then let go of me right now."

"I'll tell you this, you might think I'm just playing a game with you, but this lifetime, even if you don't have a heart, you have to grow one for me!" Feng Suige shouted sternly.

Yixiao was stunned.

Feng Suige saw her pupils gradually contract and panicked, his previous anger dissipating instantly.

"Yixiao," his voice lowered, a slight tremor from his anxiety, "I didn't mean it that way. Look, I said I wouldn't force you, I'm just, just..." He couldn't find the right words, but he still held tightly onto her arm, unwilling to let go even a little.

To his surprise, Yixiao smiled slightly, "Actually, if we talk about background, you and I are worlds apart. I don't think I have any beauty that would attract you. It's probably just that I didn't chase after you like other women do—that perhaps my unintentional difference sparked your interest."

She raised her hand to cover Feng Suige's lips, preventing him from speaking.

"Let me finish... This is the only reason I can think of for why you would love me, but I'm really very ordinary and not worth all this trouble from you. Besides, our personalities are too similar; every clash is like a new collision. Maybe once or twice we can handle it, but how long can you endure me? Half a year? A year? It won't be long."

"Yixiao, what exactly do you want?" Feng Suige finally couldn't hold back and pulled down her hand. He couldn't remember the last time he felt this frustrated.

"I don't want anything," Yixiao said calmly. "I once thought I could control my own fate, but in the end, I realized that life is more about what's required of me than what I want. Seeking nothing means losing nothing."

Feng Suige held her hand tightly. "But now it's me who wants to give to you. As long as it's within my capability, as long as I have it, you can take whatever you like," he said, his voice filled with hidden pain. "If you want an eternity, I'll give you forever. If you want a brief brilliance, I'll join you in destruction. It's okay if you don't believe me now. I'll prove to you that I'm worth trusting, not just in this life, but in three lives, even thirty lives. I'll prove it to you!"

She smiled slightly. "Temporary and eternal, no one can be sure until the moment comes. We can only be certain of the present, this moment, or this instant. It's not that I don't believe you, but what I want, you truly can't give."

Feng Suige's body tensed. "Are you trying to say you want me to set you free? Do you want to return to Xia Jingshi?"

"I never thought about going back to the Prince," Yixiao replied simply and calmly. "As for freedom, I was initially planning to wait until Princess Xiyang gave birth to the Prince's heir, until their relationship was stable, then I would bring it up with you or the Sovereign."

"I won't allow it," Feng Suige said, his eyes flashing with sharpness, "not even if I die!"

"Do you know," Yixiao didn't avoid his aggressive gaze, "here, everyone smiles at me on the surface, but their hearts are filled with resentment. Every pair of smiling eyes hides a dagger. Have you heard the saying, 'The tree that stands out in the forest is the first to be blown down by the wind'? I understand this principle." She smiled at Feng Suige. "Actually, a single question can explain everything. You, the prince of Su Sha, the future sovereign of Su Sha, will you marry a main consort? Will you have a queen? Will you, like all kings, have multiple concubines?"

One question after another left Feng Suige dumbfounded. He stared at Yixiao in a daze. Yes, he would.

Yixiao didn't wait for his response or even expect one. "Not to mention the hostility the Sovereign shows towards me, the future queen and concubines' families and clans will surely be powerful. In Su Sha, I have no roots, no backing. If my presence is seen as a threat to the status of the consorts, it would incite the noble families to act against me. It's easy for me to be quietly erased here. You have the power to protect me now, but can you guard me every moment? Can you guarantee you'll still protect me like you do now when the time comes? Moreover, I don't have such a magnanimous heart. I just want to be with my husband every day. Heh, not three thousand concubines, I can't even accept one."

Despite trying to control herself, a hint of moisture appeared in Yixiao's eyes. She couldn't help but hold his hand tightly, pressing her forehead against his shoulder. "I'm just an ordinary person. I'm not as strong as you think. All the strength you see is just to protect myself. I have to live because I want to leave here. I want to live a happy and normal life. I want to visit my mother's grave every year. I want to hug Xueying and Ning Fei's children. I don't want to stay here, waiting to be schemed against without knowing why. I don't know what lies ahead, or how many hidden threats lurk behind me... Tell me, what should I do to survive?"

Feng Suige's eyes also became wet. He gently stroked Yixiao's hair without saying a word. 

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