I Only Know How To Love

18: Alex

Cashmere and I had just left the clinic, and were on our way to drop off the results with my parents. Last time I saw them was on the weekend, yet it feels longer. "Hi mom! Hi dad!" I exclaimed once we headed up to the door and Ellie and Hector answered. "Alex! Please come on in. Both of you," Ellie and Hector exclaim. Looking at Cashmere, I grabbed her hand and we headed in. "What are you doing here?" Ellie had asked once I closed the door behind me. "I wanted to drop off the results from the doctor's appointment in case we need it in court," I tell them, handing the paper to Hector. "Good thinking Alex, I would've done the same," Hector told, grabbing the paper from my hand. "Is there anything you want to drink Cashmere?" Ellie had asked as we entered the kitchen. "Just water is good," Cashmere tells her. "Doing the right thing. I remember when I was pregnant with Alex I drank water every day, that when it came to labor, he just came right out! It was that easy! It was like popping the cork right off the champagne bottle!" Ellie had told Cashmere while getting her water.

I didn't want Cashmere to know about that. "Mom, you're embarrassing me," I tell her through my hand. I covered my face with it. "I can't help it. You're with a lucky man Cashmere," Ellie had told Cashmere. At least I don't have to be embarrassed anymore. "I remember when he took his first step. He walked across the kitchen table. We were worried he was going to break it," Hector tells us, while I cover my face again in embarrassment. "Didn't he crawl on the table?" Ellie had asked, making it sound not so bad. "You're right. His first steps were in his bedroom," Hector said. "Right after we changed his diaper," Ellie added. "Awe," both Ellie and Hector exclaimed. I had it with them. "I'm regretting coming and seeing you guys. Let's go Cashmere," I tell before trying to go in to get Cashmere. I wanted to get out of there.

"We're just messing with you," Ellie tells me, grabbing my arm to pull me back. "Don't go. I actually wanted to talk to you in private," Hector tells me. "Where did these first steps occur?" Cashmere asked Ellie. "In his bedroom," Ellie told her before Cashmere headed off with her. "Come with me," Hector told me. We headed into the master bedroom, where Hector had grabbed a box big enough to hold a ring. "What is it?" I asked once we were inside and I closed the door. "I want you to give this to Cashmere. It was your grandmother's ring, and she would've wanted you to have it," Hector tells me, handing me the box.

"Really?" I ask him. "Yes. If your grandmother was still around and met Cashmere, she would've wanted you to marry her," Hector tells. "I don't understand. Is this because she's having a kid?" I ask. It would make sense if it were because Cashmere is having the kid. She would need someone to be there for her. "It's not because of the kid. It's because of the kind of love I see the two of you have. It's special. If I were you I'd hold onto her and put a ring on her before someone else takes her from you. If you lose her, you're going to regret that big-time," he tells me. "Thanks dad. I'll think about it and put it in consideration," I tell him before I grab the box from his hand.

I had tried leaving the room, but Hector stopped me. "A love like this is special. You have to hold on. I remember when you had told me when you first met. I could tell that there was something special there. I know you weren't looking for a relationship at the time, but no matter how many times you deny it, fate and destiny will bring her back. Trust me, I've been there. Even with your mom. I met her on a summer vacation with my cousin, Luke. I denied it at first, but when I bumped into her again the next summer, I knew for sure that I loved her. She's the love of my life, and I always treated her like a queen. Yes, she's not perfect, she has some flaws that are a bit weird, but that doesn't mean that I won't stop loving her. I know you Alex. I was just like you. I didn't ask her out the first time, which is something that I still regret to this very day. If you don't hold on, if you don't put a ring on her, you will lose her, and that is going to hurt like hell," Hector tells me after grabbing my arm. "But what if you just wanted to make the most of the time you have together before you move on?" I ask, remembering I had told Cashmere that I wanted to spend the most of our time left when he had told me when she loved me.

"You don't do that. You just don't. That is going to hurt her more than you. I've known her mom, and she's said that it's taken her 15 years to find someone like you. You cannot do that to her, and I am not letting you. Who knows how long it's going to be until she finds another person like you," Hector tells. He looked like he was about to cry. I felt like I was about to cry as well. "She has said that there is no other person that could replace me," I tell him, trying to get it through the tears. "That just proves how much she loves you, and how much she wants you to stay in her life. She's found you, she wants to keep you in her life, and you just need to respect that. There's no moving on from her. I repeat, you are not losing her. I made a big mistake by doing that with your mom the first time, and I don't want you to do the same. You are not moving on from her. You just need to respect that she wants to keep you in her life, no matter how hard things get. Isn't that why you made that promise to her?" Hector tells. One part of me thought that the promise I made to her was going to come back and bite me in the ass. The promise that I had made to her was that I was going to help her to a better future and a better life no matter what happens.

"Yes," I answered. "Then live your promise like you mean it. Who knows how many more men are going to break her heart, leave her, and her going through her suicidal phase, without you. Think about that. Think about that before you say you want to spend the most time with her before you move on. Think dammit. Have you ever listened to your heart and not your head before?" Hector asks. "No," I told him. "Then it's about time that you did," he tells me before I wipe my tears and leave the room with the ring. I left the house after finding Cashmere in the middle of a story with Ellie about my childhood. On the way back, I had really thought about what Hector had told me. He is right. I had made a promise to Cashmere telling her that I would fulfill it no matter what happens. I said it and I'm sticking to it, and then I do something completely different. I'm stupid for putting Cashmere through that. Why didn't I realize that I was doing the opposite of what I told her?