I Only Know How To Love

23: Ben

It was now the end of the day, and I was reflecting on the day I was having. In Social, a bomb went off from underneath my class, and I rushed out of there. There may have been a few minor bruises, but I don't need to get checked out. I tried to get it out of my head, until lunchtime. I was in the cafeteria, and a dead body was found on the floor. Jack must've striked again. I never wanted to think of Jack being a horrible person before, because I've known him since we were in grade 4, but this is different now. He's done horrible things to people, especially my girlfriend. He's done nothing but torture her, and I want to hurt him in any way possible, and then hold Cashmere and tell her that everything's going to be all right, yet nothing was going to get better. It was now jazz band, but we weren't in the mood to play, because Jason's seat was empty, and beside Steven. He looked like he was going to cry. We had our instruments out along with our music, but we all weren't in the mood to play today; we all stared at what was Jason's seat. "What's going on with you guys? It's jazz band. Time to play jazz!" Aaron had exclaimed, entering the room. "We're too depressed," Bobby had let out from the front row. Cashmere was in the middle row with her trombone, and I was behind her with my trumpet.

"Why?" Aaron had asked in a curious tone. "It's been awhile since we last had Jason," Lana had let out from the keyboard. "What happened with him?" Aaron asked. Clearly he didn't find out from Jason's parents that he died. That may be because Jason doesn't have parents. It's weird. What I had heard was that he was given up when he was a baby. Taken to the hospital after being born even. "You didn't hear what happened? Cashmere are you going to say something? You were the one who witnessed it," Bobby had asked. "What's going on?" Aaron had asked in a concerned tone. "It's too hard," Cashmere had let out. "We're here to support you," Chris had told her, putting her hand on Cashmere's shoulder as a sign of comfort. "Okay?" Steven asked, putting his trombone down and putting his hand out for Cashmere. "Okay," Cashmere had told, holding onto Steven's outreached hand. "What's going on? What happened? Is he hurt?" Aaron had asked with his voice starting to break. "He's dead Mr. Jazler," Cashmere had finally let out, starting to cry. Bobby had turned around, and we both comforted her. I had put my arm around her back, and rubbed her back very lightly as Bobby had held onto her hand. "Why didn't you say something before?" Aaron asked, choking on his tears. "I thought Mr. Hudson would say something to you," she told him. "Finn, Mr. Hudson didn't say anything," Aaron told us. Weird that Finn didn't say anything. "We're too depressed to play," Lana had told him. "I get it. Put away your instruments and come back in here. We'll discuss Jason," Aaron told us. "I like the sound of that," I had already put my trumpet back in it's case, and when we went to put our instruments away, I put it in the music locker and went to Cashmere and hugged her before heading back in with my arm still around her. I sat in the chair beside her, rubbing her back as comfort, as she told the entire class of what happened with Jack and Jason on the last day she saw Jason.

"Jason had a friend named Jack. They were good friends, until Jack had started tormenting me. Jason had known nothing about it, and I was so close to telling him everything that happened. I was too late. Jack had then raped me, and I'm now pregnant with his kid. Jack doesn't know though. Anyway, Jack had tried to kill me, but Jason took his life for mine. His last words were, "Don't be afraid to hold on". It was like he was speaking to me. Worst part of it all, is that I heard from Doctor Henshaw earlier today, saying that his body was missing," Cashmere told us. Wait, what? His body was missing? "What?" I ask her. "Yeah," she whimpered. "Why didn't you say anything?" I ask her, trying not to look jealous because of what Jason had told her. "I didn't know who to tell!" Cashmere told without thinking, getting it through the tears. "Ben, remember what I said that day when you were talking to Alex at All City?" Bobby had asked. There were multiple times when I talked to Alex, so I wasn't quite sure which one he was talking about. "Not really," I tell him. "The jealous boyfriend isn't a good look on you," Bobby tells me, reminding me of the night of the incident when Alex and I were getting in an argument. "Oh that night," I tell him, realizing it. "Yeah," Bobby tells me as if I had pulled the look again. "I remember the last time we talked was at lunch that day. When I was about to head to class, he said goodbye as if something was going to happen to him," Lana had let out, sitting beside one of the guitar players. "Wasn't there a lockdown in the last block that day?" Aaron had asked, trying not to choke on his tears, but it was impossible now for him to not.

"Yeah. That's when we were getting him out of the school and to the hospital," Cashmere tells us. "Yeah I know, we all miss him," I hear Jade saying rather sarcastically. "What are you saying Jade?" Amanda had asked. "What if he's actually still alive and she's just covering it up?" Jade had asked rather rudely. If there is one thing I know about Cashmere, it's that she would never joke around about this kind of stuff. "I would never joke around about something like that," Cashmere told us, trying not to cry. "Jade, please don't claim something like that about someone," Natalia had told her. Natalia, Jade, and Amanda are the other trumpet players in the jazz band. "I'm just saying it's possible. Or someone came and brought him back, but it's just a theory," Jade told us. "Yeah, a bad theory," Amanda had commented. I didn't want to say anything to them, otherwise it would piss off Cashmere, and I don't want to do that to her. She's already been through so much. "Guys, please. Don't start up something that doesn't need to be brought up," Aaron had told them, and they didn't say anything after. "We all miss him. That's a fact," Steven had told us. "Yet he could still be alive. His body was missing? What if he was brought back and we're too late?" Jade asked one final time before shutting up. Cashmere was now hiding her face in her hands, and we all went in to give Cashmere a group hug. Jade stepped out. "We'll get to the bottom of this," Aaron had told us. I don't know how we would, but we could at least have faith that we can. "If he is, then we have to wait for him to find us. We can't go looking for him," Cashmere told us. It's always best to not put our noses where they don't belong. "I agree," I tell her. "I need to go," she tells me. "Okay," I tell her before she headed out and went home. I really don't think that everything is going to get better; in fact, everything might just make a turn for the worst.