Iris ↠ l.h.

Cause i don't think that they'd understand...

It was a realization.

A realization that she's always know, but pushed it back to the darkest part of her mind.

Because dark thoughts were never enjoyable.

And dark thoughts always lead to dark actions.

Actions that Iris had no control over, it seemed like natural instinct to fall into her dark thoughts.

Iris wasn't always this way.

I mean, no child is ever born into a state of darkness.

They're happy and life is fantastic because, as a child, we're so oblivious to the facts that when you see your mommy with bruises, it's just because daddy loves her too much.

So much, that it hurts.

Or so she's told.

Then she grows up and mom still has bruises, more and more.

Dad always has a silver bottle, that seemed flat, in his hand.

She was no longer convinced that when they yelled at each other downstairs they weren't doing it because they loved each other so much that they had to yell for the whole neighborhood to hear.

Curiosity got the best of her.

She had to ask.

But the explanation behind each problem was:

I'm a klutz, sweetie, always falling down.

The silver bottle helps daddy, he needs it. Kind of like medicine.

Parents fight, it's not unusual.

She can't help but wonder: none of my friends parents are like this.

Then, mom dies.

Mom was killed.

She were with her.

But the only reason dad is upset is because he blames Iris.

He blames Iris because he has no one left to use as his own personal punching bag.

That is, no one else but herself.

But Iris believes she deserves it.

Because her dad convinced her that she deserves it, that everything was her fault and this was her punishment.

She stops talking.

Stops talking because she believes everything she says is her fault.

Then, there's Luke.

This blue eyed boy, who believed he had nothing to live for until he met Iris.

He fell in love with her.

He met Iris and she was this mystery that Luke couldn't get enough of.

But then everything ended.

Iris opened her mouth.

It couldn't be any coincidence that once Iris started talking everything went downhill.

Luke realized that he didn't need Iris to get through life, which was great.

But now Iris literally had nobody.

Before this, she has her dad. Granted, because of the way she grew up she was oblivious as to why her dad was hurting her.

But he was still there. She still had someone.

Then there was Luke, she tried to distance herself at first but finally let him in.

And it was the best moments of her life.

Then, everything went too fast, everything felt uncontrollable.

Everything was crazy, and so out of reach.

Everything was ruined.

Because of her.

So, her realization?

She needed to die.

She needed to end all the suffering she caused, and all the suffering her life will bring her if she continues to go on.

She walked and walked and walked until she found the place she wanted to be.

There was an abandoned bridge, people usually went to so they could get high.

But it was tall enough, with rough waters beneath it.

So Iris walked and walked until she got to the highest peak.

It was a cliche but nothing really ever ends poetically. It just ends and we turn into poetry.

Poetry that will be read but never fully understood.

Worthless, really.

Just like how Iris felt.

No one will ever understand why. They'll make up some other excuses as to why she could've stayed but it was a choice that wasn't up to them.

Of course, Iris left a note for Luke in his mailbox.

Because he was the only one she believed that she owed and explanation.

But nothing was going to stop her.

So as she fell, and landed to the ground.

Her life flashing before her eyes, blood trailing out from the top of her head.

Everything ended.

And that blood was never once beautiful.
It was just red.