24. Changed Madhav

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Dear Gentle Readers

Happy Reading

Whenever, wherever
We're meant to be together
I'll be there, and you'll be near
And that's the deal, my dear....

Whenever, whereverWe're meant to be togetherI'll be there, and you'll be nearAnd that's the deal, my dear

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" I do not know much about wedding rituals. " I hear Rudra say but my mind is completely elsewhere.

I can't take my mind off Meera. Her face is all I see and dream of. When she talked to me the day I met her at the wedding, it seemed that she was over me long ago, which made me angry at myself and frustrated that I wasn't able to do the same as her. Move on. But the more time I spent around her it's confusing me.

She still cares. That much is evident from the day at the store. If you ask Me, one only cares about people who matter to them. She might have saved anyone but she wouldn't have taken care of the barely there injury.

And the day at Shivi's housewarming party. I bet she would have let me kiss her and even kissed me back. The way her eyes lingered on my lips. I saw it in her eyes. It was love, not lust.

The flames might be turned into embers but they are still there.

The way her body reacted to my touch. She let me hold her, touch her and lean into me. One second, everything was there. My Meera. The girl I fell in love with. But in another, She went stiff in my arms and just ran away. The remarkable woman she has become  who faced everything head-on, ran away like she saw a ghost. And she not only ran away from me but left the party altogether.

Like she was forcing herself to stay away from me.

Her disappearance that night nearly gave me a heart attack and I am not exaggerating. The last time I was so scared was for her. A lot can happen and I do not wish for her to be in the same situation ever again. That night was more than enough for her.

Yet she is putting herself in such situations.

It won't take me much time to hack into her phone or laptop and know everything about her but that's wrong. She already doesn't want to Track her location. Which isn't wrong on her part. And it would be wrong if I did that.

That's why I am not doing anything like that.

I want her to feel safe and trust me again to tell me everything I need to know, and for that, I need to know her again.

I need clarity. I need to know more about what the new version of my Meera that she  hides. That's the only way I can put my mind to rest.

There isn't any woman who has held my attention or stayed in my mind other than her.

I was so disappointed and angry the day she didn't come. Now, when I look back at the eighteen-year-old me, I realize I didn't hate her.

I never hated her.

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