Mrs. Bieber [Zustin Mieber FF] English Version

Part 17

Zayn

"Could you kindly explain this to me before I freak out?!" Liam yelled at me.

I took a deep breath. "Why don't you just tell me, Liam?"

Liam yelled out in frustration.

"I assume it was Justin you had to apologize to?"

"And if it was? It's not your job to worry about it," I snapped.

Liam snorted. "The 'not your job' thing stopped when you started attacking him on Twitter!"

"I didn't attack him! He did it and I just retorted!" I corrected him, jumping up. I didn't need to feel even dirtier when he was yelling at me from above.

"Was that really necessary? Did you really need to draw so much attention to yourself?! Didn't you think about the consequences?! Didn't you think about what kind of shitty publicity that would bring to One Direction?!" he demanded, his voice getting louder and more condescending with each word. I opened my mouth but he interrupted me. "NO! You didn't! Because all you're thinking about is yourself! And then, as if that wasn't enough, you're getting Niall and me involved in this shit!"

"Stop it! I didn't force you to retweet that! I didn't put a gun to your head and say 'You better retweet that or I'll pull the trigger'!" I said bitchy.

Liam growled. "But you know what Niall is like! He retweets everything Justin tweets because he's obsessed with Justin!"

"So what?! I didn't know retweeting my idol's tweets was such a bad thing!" Niall chimed in, entering the room.

"Did you overhear my and Liam's conversation?" I asked with a slightly sour undertone.

Niall looked at me and growled. "It's a bit harsh to call it eavesdropping when the whole hallway can hear you."

I bit my lip. Were we that loud? I wasn't shouting, that was all Liam. He was the one who took things too seriously.

"Have you ever thought what management will say about this? You might as well have dug your own grave!" Niall added. He must have read the blog too. I mean, the page had over two million views and it was posted earlier this morning.

Harry snorted. "I hope you have a will, Zayn, because she's going to cut your head off before the Red Queen can even give the order." Louis laughed. "You're as good as done, maybe you should call your mother and say goodbye."

"Lou? Should we call a priest so he can make his final confession?" Harry asked him with a gleeful grin.

"Oh, shut up, you idiots! I'm not going to die!" I said aggressively.

"Not yet." Louis pointed out, giggling.

"Zayn, would you rather die slowly and painfully or quickly and painlessly?" Harry asked. Damn Larry was just stronger than me.

"It doesn't matter what he wishes for, because the worst nightmare would be Management's bedtime story." Liam interjected in a disguised deep voice.

"Ohh, I bet it's a lethal injection!" Louis explained.

"I think it'll be a simple gunshot. Shoot the bastard!" Niall suggested.

"I'm thinking of an old-fashioned public hanging in the market square," Harry giggled.

"BURN HIM ALIVE!" Liam shouted and everyone burst into laughter, holding on to each other to keep from falling over.

I bit my lip as it started to shake. They were all sons of bitches. All of them. After all, they were predicting my fucking death sentence.

When I heard my phone ring in my pocket, my heart started racing and I felt my palms getting sweaty.

I wasn't scared of many things, but I was definitely scared of our management. They were strict, intimidating and expected perfection. They wanted us to be this perfect, clean, nice boy band. Something none of us were. We drank, we partied, we were all no longer virgins and we all had tattoos, except Niall. Man, did we get in trouble for the visible tattoos. Not that I cared. I had had the laser procedure because the images on my body meant something to me.

"Hello?" I answered my phone as politely as I could. I didn't want to give them a reason to start yelling at me.

"Is there something you'd like to tell me, Zayn?" Roger's voice asked, dark and ominous, apparently trying to scare me with his tone.

"What is it, sir?" I asked mockingly. I wasn't going to play his little bitch. I wasn't a 16 year old kid who was going to be intimidated.

"You know exactly what I mean, Zayn. Don't act like it, it's all on the internet and on gossip talk shows." he replied and I could hear his teeth gnashing.

"Ooh, you mean the fact that we won the three TCA's? Thanks for the late congratulations." I replied.

"Zayn Javaad Malik, don't play games with me, or the consistent ones will only get bigger." He threatened.

"So that's not the punishment? Hearing your panting, annoying voice isn't torture enough?" I knew I was walking a narrow path, yes. "

What the hell happened? Why do you have Perez Hilton and E! News on your box just because of your little squabble with Justin?" he demanded.

I sighed. "We had a little disagreement, but I apologized to him. And now everything is fine. You don't have to try to sound like Darth Vader, Roger."

"Oh! Okay!" he exclaimed, his voice even shriller than before.

"Uh, okay?" I mumbled.

"Yeah! Once you apologize, everything will be fine, right?" he asked.

I smiled. "Yeah, it is."

"WRONG! DID YOU REALLY THOUGHT APOLOGIZING WOULD HELP YOU GET THE PRESS OFF YOUR FUCKING ASS?! EVERYONE NOW THINKS THE TEEN CHOICE AWARDS WAS JUST A FUCKING PUBLICITY ACT!" he screamed.

"But it was just a publicity act." I interjected, laughing.

"BUT NO ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT! AND NOW, JUST BECAUSE OF YOU AND JUSTIN, EVERYONE THINKS YOU HATE EACH OTHER AND YOUR MANAGEMENT IS WRONG, DISHONEST AND MONEY HUNGRY!" he told me, still screaming.

"But you are, Roger." I replied.

"ZAYN MALIK, YOU SHOULD JUST SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH BEFORE I CUT YOUR FUCKING TONGUE OFF! THIS IS NOT A JOKE! WE HAVE TO FIX THIS! YOU HAVE TO FIX THIS!" he now sounded like he was about to have a heart attack.

"Me? Why me?!" I asked, Justin wasn't entirely innocent either.

"Do I look like Scooter Braun? Am I managing Justin?!" he growled.

I sighed. "No, then you would sound more American than British."

He sighed in frustration.

"I could skin you alive and I wouldn't feel any remorse."

"Are you a sadist? Or the Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Are you going to wear my face as a mask?" I teased.

"Zayn Malik, I'm going to go clean up your mess now. But from now on you are no longer allowed to use your Twitter account, management will have full control over it from now on." he announced the consequences.

"What?! What the hell?! Why?" I screamed.

"Because you obviously can't handle your fame and keep your damn mouth shut." He snapped.

"Fine! It's not like I'm ever on that often anyway! Have fun filling the void I'm leaving behind!" I shrieked, clutching the phone.

"I'm surprised you even have 10 million followers, you tweet something maybe once every 84 years." He replied, sarcasm dripping in his voice.

"Then I guess that means you must be as old as Jesus." I snapped back.

He ignored my answer. "You will tweet one last time. And this tweet will be a public apology, you will say it was all just some kind of joke. To appease the fans and give Perez Hilton nothing more to write about, unless you really have something to hide." He said suspiciously.

I took a deep breath and plastered a smile on my face, not thinking that he couldn't see me.

"Of course I didn't, I just lost my temper for a moment." I calmed him down with a lie.

"Okay, also banned from using any social media for the next two weeks. No Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Kik, Snapchat and everything else." He ordered.

"You better take away my phone and laptop and send me back to the Stone Age. Maybe then I'll finally meet Fred Flintstone!" I said sarcastically.

"I could do that. Take away all your electronics, don't tempt me, kid."

"You wouldn't do that! You have no damn right to do that! You're not my mother!" I screamed.

All I could hear on the other side of the line was his barking laughter.

"Kid, your ass is mine until the contract ends."

And I couldn't hang up fast enough.

--

Justin

"So what was that about this Twitter argument?" Heidi asked me.

I sighed, Heidi had shown me Perez Hilton's blog post, she was apparently a loyal reader of his daily blog.

"We had a little argument and he pissed me off. I left that out on my Twitter account. So I started it. And he, being who he was, had to end it." I grumbled.

"You two really are the worst married couple on Earth. Shouldn't you still be in the honeymoon phase?" she teased.

"There hasn't been a honeymoon since the beginning, not even a fucking wedding ceremony that I can remember."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Did Scooter call you? Isn't he trying to bite you in the ass?"

"There have been worse fiascos I've been involved in." I shrugged.

"Like the Mariah Yeater baby case." she interjected.

"If we could fix that, we can fix anything." I nodded.

"So including waking up and being married," she giggled.

"Yeah," I chuckled. "Nothing can top that. Because this thing is unfortunately true."

"Does Scooter know?" she asked.

"No, why the fuck would I tell him?" I asked her.

"Because you trust him? Because he's the one who introduced you to this industry? The one who introduced you to Usher? The one who discovered you on YouTube in the first place?" she listed, holding up four fingers.

"He doesn't have to know about it," I sighed. "He'd just be disappointed in me. And by the way, you're the one who knows about it other than Zayn and our lawyers. I want to keep it that way."

She sighed and looked like she wanted to say something else, but she didn't.

"Fine. But not even your mother?"

I buried my face in my hands. "I want her to find out I'm married when I really want to be. When I find the right girl and can put a ring on her finger. Not some mistake I made drunk in Las Vegas."

"What if it wasn't a mistake, but fate? What if you and Zayn aren't meant to be in a romantic relationship, but you're meant to be a part of each other's lives? You know, fate works in mysterious ways. And God has a weird sense of humor." Heidi suggested, her voice suddenly very serious.

I was about to answer, but my ringing phone interrupted me. It was Scooter. "Maybe fate has other plans, but me and Zayn? That's nonsense." Then I answered the call. "Hey, Scooter." I greeted.

I heard him sigh. "Justin Drew Bieber, what got into you?"

"Well, Zayn and I talked for a bit and then we started arguing. I got pretty angry and tweeted something indirect about him. And I kept doing it, just like he did." I explained.

He giggled. "Haven't you seen their interviews? Did you really think Zayn would just let this go and do nothing?"

I grinned. "No, I didn't." My darling wifey is not one to act like that and stay quiet.

"So, you didn't like the taste of your own medicine he gave you, did you?" he asked, laughing.

"Why are you being so casual about it?" I asked him incredulously.

"I'm not happy about this situation, that's for sure, in fact I'm pretty pissed. But it's a rough time for you, so I'm trying to understand you a little. And it's working, isn't it?" he said.

I had to laugh a little. "Yeah, I'm really sorry if I'm causing trouble for you and my publicist."

He laughed briefly. "Sharon is working on it. But honestly, do you really hate him that much? Or is that a misjudgment on Perez's part?"

I had to think for a moment. Did I still harbor such a strong hatred for Zayn? Did I really want to kill him when I said it? Sure, he annoyed and angered me to no end, was moody, grumpy and treacherous, took some things too seriously, but did I really hate him?

"No, not really. He's a proper guy." I replied with a shrug.

"Well, that's a relief to hear. Zayn's management has been contacting me all morning. They want you and Zayn to apologize publicly on Twitter. Make it look like it was all just a joke, harmless banter." he sighed.

I laughed. "That doesn't sound too bad, that would get rid of Perez."

"It probably would. Is there anything else I should know? Because Perez seemed serious that there was something bigger going on," he quoted the blogger. "And he wanted to and would find out."

I swallowed the lump of lies and guilt in my throat. I hated the feeling that lying made me feel. "No, you don't have to worry about anything. Me and Zayn are just trying to be friends."

"That's good! Maybe then we can put an end to the feud that the press is stirring up between you and One Direction." He said happily.

I laughed. "You're almost cheering, are you drunk?"

"Maybe. I'm with the Wanted guys right now and you know how they are, always partying." He chuckled.

"Tell Nathan, Jay, Siva, Tom and Max hey for me!" I said with a huge grin on my face. Those guys were crazy.

"I will. Try to stay calm, especially when your tour continues. We don't need any more stress." he ordered me.

"It's fine, Scooter. Take care of yourself, man." I said goodbye.

"You too, JB. Don't start any more Twitter wars! Focus on the music." he instructed me fatherly. "

I will! This is definitely the end of my tour of duty in the Twitter War Army!" I joked and he laughed.

"Smart guy. Try to pay attention next time before you do something rash, JB."

I just laughed and hung up. Well, that went better than I thought. It was weird that Scooter didn't want to strangle me. Maybe he would, but I was here and he was there, so he couldn't do it anyway.

It was creepy how nice he was when he had a little alcohol in his system, it made him feel a lot more mellow. I would definitely bring him one the next time I mess up.

I was about to go back to Heidi because I had been walking down the hall while on the phone when I got a message from none other than my beloved wife.

Hey, did Scooter tell you about the Twitter apology thing arrangement? -Zee

Yeah, it was your sour management's idea, right? -Justin

What makes you think it was their idea? I might as well want to be out of the spotlight, right? -Zee

Boy, you knew from the moment you signed up for X factor that you were going to be in the spotlight, so don't give me any bullshit. -Justin

Fine. It was Roger's idea. -Zee

Roger? -Justin

My manager. -Zee

His name reminds me of Mr. Rogers. Please don't tell me he wears red or yellow polos and has a toy train set! -Justin

Hahaha, what if he does? -Zee

OMFG it would be Mr. Rogers reincarnated! –Justin

I'll have to tell him that next time, thanks for the brilliant idea husband! You're finally being of use. –Zee

I know I'm a late bloomer. But I don't disappoint... and neither does my cock ;) –Justin

You mention your cock quite a lot. Do you suffer from Napoleon Syndrome? –Zee

What the hell is Napoleon Syndrome? –Justin

When short men (in all areas) have to be loud and annoying to cover up their small appearance. –Zee

OMFG. I think you have it, Zayn. Good self-diagnosis! –Justin

I'm fucking taller and older than you. So why would I have that? –Zee

Notice you didn't say longer. So you may be taller in height, but not where it counts, honey ;) –Justin

I'm not talking about penis length! Especially since yours is just tied down anyway. –Zee

Need a loaner penis extenders, Wifey? Or do you want it removed completely? -Justin

Even with my penis chopped off, mine would still be longer than your Tic Tac dick. -Zee

So your management chopped off your dick? -Justin

They threatened me with that. -Zee

I couldn't hold back my laughter when I read that. Oh my god his management was uptight.

For their sake we gotta do what? -Justin

Well, Roger Rabbit wants me to tweet some sort of apology to my fans, basically to say it was just a joke. So we can get rid of the press and Perez. -Zee

Okay, you go first. And I'll respond. But not right away, we don't want to seem too fake. -Justin

Okay, I'm just logging in. You guys need to know, this will be my absolute last tweet, forever. Management has taken over my account since my slip-up. -Zee

Seriously? -Justin

Yep, and they're blocking me from all social media for the next two weeks. They literally want me to slit my wrists. -Zee

Seriously?! What the hell?! You're 20! Not 12! Dude, your management is like pretty strict parents. Good luck! It's going to be okay, honey, I'm here for you. -Justin

Stop making fun of me! -Zee

Hahahaha, not even your husband will text you, muhahaha. -Justin

Really funny, really. You dick. -Zee

Before I could reply, he messaged again.

Alright, I'll send the tweet now. Wait maybe an hour to respond. -Zee

I will, my lovely wifey. But, Zayn? What if Perez finds out? What if he finds out about Vegas? -Justin

He won't. It won't even occur to him. At most he'll think that we slept with our respective ex-girlfriends. -Zee

I would never do that. I'd rather fuck a cactus than your ex! -Justin

Haha, you'll have a prickly dick! Haha, but thanks buddy, I wouldn't sleep with Selena either, I'd rather let management cut off my dick. -Zee


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