Nemesism [Max Verstappen]

[16] finding comfort in misery

Hello, just wanted to let you know that this chapter is probably a mess. I wrote it over the span of several days and I'm not very happy with it :)

TW's: self-harm (talking mostly), injury

Anyways, enjoy!

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Lucy's diary

Currently rethinking life.

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They ended up in Lucy's room, which Max wasn't very happy with, but the girl had pulled him towards it with such determination he did not dare to argue. Once they were inside and the door was locked, the strong grip around the Dutchmans sleeve disappeared and he had a chance to breathe, get into a defensive position.

Eventually he ended up in the middle of the room, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck as Lucy still stood by the door, staring daggers at him.

»Show me.« Lucy's voice was low, a growl. It sounded nothing like her usual chipper self.

Max's shoulder slumped even further, his body tensing under the realization that he'd really fucked up. If even Lucy couldn't say some encouraging bullshit... Still, he tried his denial strategy, his only, very desperate attempt at just being left alone.

»What do you mean? I'm okay-« He wouldn't even have believed himself, especially not with his voice shaking more and more with every word.

»Don't lie to me, Verstappen!« Lucy hissed, taking a couple steps closer, her eyes narrow as they trailed to the red stains. »I know what fucking self-harm looks like. I know- Just fucking show me!«

»No.«

Approaching another two steps, Lucy stemmed her hands into her hips. Whatever she lacked in physical intimidation was made up by the spark in her eyes. The one that sent a shiver down Max's spine. But he stayed strong, defiantly shaking his head and crossing his arms.

»Show me!« The blonde pushed the words through her teeth, one hand on Max's biceps, trying to pull his hands away.

She knew how out right wrong it was to try and force him to do anything, even if it was for his own good, but she was worried out of her mind. Questions and speculations running through her brain at full speed.

Lucy had never been in the position where she needed to worry about someone else hurting themselves and hadn't been prepared for how devastating it felt. Her gust were twisting in all sorts of ways, pain surging through her heart every time she caught a glimpse of the blood stains on the white fabric.

Most of all she blamed herself for not noticing Max was going to do something like this. You had to get to a certain point of mental suffering to consider taking it out on your own body. Had she just paid more attention... really looked for the signs, she could have prevented this.

»Please, Max... Let me look at it.« Lucy looked up at the blue eyes just to see that they'd gone from scared to mad in a matter of seconds.

Frowning she pulled her hand back, clearly having gone a step too far. Max's eyes followed her hand before shooting back up to her face, letting out a huff.

»So, what? So you can publish it in your article?« A bitter laugh emerged from deep within Max's chest as he threw his head back. He wasn't even sure if he believed his own words, he just needed to distract the girl. »Make the world give me their pity just like Christian wants them to? That's why he hired you, right? To better my image?«