[Sue, Kurt, and Mercedes are in Sue's office.]
Sue: Ladies, what we have here is a grade-A dilemma. Mercedes, your vocal cords have had more fantastic runs than a Kenyan track team but that look simply will not do. At first I thought it was a subtle homage to yours truly but now I fear it's some sort of ironic comment.
Mercedes: Ms. Sylvester, I'm just not comfortable in those Cheerios skirts. They don't fit me right.
Kurt: Mercedes, you shouldn't feel embarrassed about your body.
Mercedes: Embarrassed? No, no. I'm worried about showing too much skin and causing a sex riot.
Mercedes laughed, and did others, completely amused.
"Oh you know you would, girl. With curves like those? Please!" Stasia said and Mercedes laughed in complete amusement.
[They both Laugh, wiggle their fingers and flip their hair, but Sue continues to frown]
Sue: How do you two not have a show on Bravo? Here's the skinny. Splits magazine, after much campaigning by one Sue Sylvester has named me cheerleading coach of the last 2,000 years. In seven days reporter Tracy Pendergrass will arrive on campus and my new star singer will have lost 10 pounds and be in a gender-appropriate cheerleading uniform or she is off the team.
"What?!" People said, completely outraged by what the woman was saying.
[Mercedes sits in shock as Kurt speaks up on her behalf.]
Kurt: Ten pounds? Are you serious?
Sue: You could lose a few too, kiddo. You got hips like a pear. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to put in a call to the Ohio secretary of state notifying them I will no longer be carrying photo I. D. You know why? People should know who I am.
"Yeah, a real bloody bitch." Rebekah said, frowning.
[School Bell Rings]
[Will enters the teacher lounge where Sue is eating at a table.]
Will: Sue! We need to talk. The auditorium is padlocked!
Sue: Well, that's curious. Did you check the sign-up sheet?
Will: What sign-up sheet?
Sue: Why, the one I keep right here in my waistband, William.
[Sue pulls out a paper that says 'Auditorium Use' with Cheerios written on it, and a line through the rest of the spots, saying that they were using it for a long while.]
Sue: Let's see. Yeah, I've got the entire week booked solid. Got a big magazine feature coming up and it's a little chilly for my girls to be practicing outdoors.
"Don't y'all have a gym?" Elena asked, frowning.
"Yeah, why?" Santana asked her.
Will: Yeah? Well, let's see what Figgins has to say about this.
Sue: Oh, I'm sure Figgins will just mumble something nervously and then pretend to take a call. I happen to be blackmailing him.
[Will gives her a look of disbelief. In the choir room Will sits on a stool and talks to the group.]
Will: Um, all right, I have one final announcement before we all leave. We can't use the auditorium for the next week.
Finn: But that's garbage. How are we supposed to practice for Regional's without the auditorium?
YOU ARE READING
Someone New
Fanfiction"Is it too good to be true? The way I feel with you Maybe it's just in my head Yeah I've been here before On love I closed the door Tryna save the heart that's left Oh no I think I may be falling again Don't know how this story is gonna end Oh i'm t...
