Someone New

Dream On

(Enter WILL into FIGGINS' Office)

WILL: Hey, you wanted to see me?

FIGGINS: William, there's someone I'd like to introduce you to. He's the newest member of our school board. And he'd like to speak to you. Will Schuester, meet Mr. Bryan Ryan.

BRYAN RYAN: We've met.

WILL: (voiceover) Bryan Ryan. We went to school together, and he made my life a living hell. He was two years older. Dated every girl I liked. Got every solo.

(Cut to the past; BRYAN RYAN singing "Daydream Believer" in the choir room, he lights a match and turns them into flowers for a girl) 

BRYAN: What's the matter, Schuester, cat got your talent?

WILL: (forced chuckle)

(Cut back to present in Figgins' office)

BRYAN: I'm here to do an audit of our curriculum, Will. We may need to cut some of our district's art programs.

FIGGINS: It's really just a formality, William.

BRYAN: No, it's not. We'll probably cut the glee club.

WILL: What?! But-but you were in the glee club. Show choir was your life.

BRYAN: It was, Will. And after I graduated, I hit the big time. I was a featured soloist at King's Island in The Dooble-Dee-Doo Musical Revue. We were a smash. Then for three years, I did the cruise ship circuit. But when that dried up, I realized I had been sold a bill of goods. Nine years later, I woke up on a urine-stained mattress in the West Lima crack district. Then...something amazing happened. I was introduced to Jesus. He was my Honduran social worker. I straightened up, put down the pipe, met the love of my life, Wilma, and now I run a successful used Hummer dealership. Don't make that face. Global warming's a theory. (Exhales) And four nights a week, I run a show choir conversion group. 

"Is that even a thing?" Caroline asked with a frown, but the Glee only shrugged. 

(Cut to show choir conversion group)

BRENDA: Hi, I'm Brenda. And it's been 42 days since I sang a show tune.

GROUP: Hi, Brenda.

BRENDA: Years ago when I auditioned to play Miss Adelaide in Guys and Dolls, I was asked to take my top off. Evidently, that is not... customary. And... that's when I started huffing glue.

RUSSELL: My name is Russell; I'm a glee club survivor. Whenever anything bad would happen, I would just say, "Let's put on a show." Well, guess what? "Puttin' on a show!" about your father's prostate cancer (voice cracking) will actually just make him more depressed about the situation. 

"Oh dear God." 

BRYAN: Show choir kills.

(Cut back to BRYAN, WILL and FIGGINS in Figgins' office)

BRYAN: I just want to have a talk with your kids. Make sure you're not building up their hopes just to have them knocked down.

WILL: What if I say no?

FIGGINS: Just let him speak to the kids, William. Let Mr. Bryan Ryan contribute to the marketplace of ideas. What's the worst that can happen?

(Cut to WILL, BRYAN and the rest of the glee cub in the choir room)

WILL: Okay, guys, listen up. This is Mr. Ryan. He's a member of the school board, and he would like to say a few words. I-I just want you guys to listen critically and know that what he's saying is just one of many opinions.