Big Book of Solarballs

How Ask or Dare Starts

Earth was bored. Bored as ever. And Luna has already fallen asleep.

Mars was bored.

And Venus and Mercury were arguing as always.

The four inner planets were playing cards as usual, but eventually it got a bit boring and very complicated, with the constant rule-changing and stuff.

Sure, asteroid dodgeball was an option, but Mercury didn't know how to play and none of the others were in the mood for trying to teach him.

"Ugh, this is so boring!" Earth yelled. "Is there nothing else to do in this dump?"

"Careful, Earth," Mars replied, "the Sun would not be happy with insulting the Solar System."

Earth rolled his eyes, "Sun can handle it. Plus, all he does is stay in the background and smile, when the episode doesn't focus on him."

"Huh. That is true," Mercury said.

"No one asked, Pipsqueak. But seriously, I haven't been this bored since before Earth started trying to be my friend," Venus grumped.

Luna, who had woken up shortly after the conversation, decided to go to Saturn's orbit.

As he floated to meet up with Titan, something caught his eye.

An Earthling...

Luna drifted closer to greet it. It wasn't Astrodude, but the Earthling didn't seem to be surprised about the whole "talking planets" thing.

"Hey, Luna," said the Earthling.

Luna was confused. "You know my name? I thought everyone knew me as Earth's Moon—Wait, why aren't you freaking out over planets, or, well, moons talking?"

The Earthling shrugged, "Well, one, Earthlings kinda gave you the name Luna."

"Well, I guess you're right."

"And, two," she continued, "I'm not surprised over you all being able to talk. You're on a show."

"I know that," Luna said, raising an eyebrow. "But why do you know that? You aren't on the show."

"No. But I watched the show."

"Wait—You can do that? Huh." That was a lot of information the Moon was getting.

"I'm not from here. I'm one of the viewers," the Earthling told him.

"What!? Wait, like...Patreon—"

"Sadly, I'm not a Patreon," the Earthling cut him off.

"Then wha—H-How are you here?" Luna asked.

This was one interesting Earthling.

"I'm here to host a separate, non-canonical series."

Luna blinked.

"It's basically gonna be called "Ask or Dare". The viewers, or in this case, readers, are going to ask or dare any one of you who's on the show anything."

"Oh... You know what, that sounds like a fun idea! The others have been bored for a long time, so I'm sure they'll want to join too."

"Great!" The Earthling says.

"Yeah. So should I, uh, get them here to meet you?" Luna asks.

"No, everyone in this solar system already knows. This conversation has been live on screens that have been summoned in front of every planet/non-planet group."

"Oh! Well, um, that's interesting."

"It is," the Earthling simply said. "By the way, you can call me Lyric."

Just then, all the planets, the Sun, moons, dwarf planets, and Planet X appeared out of thin 'air'. They already know what's going on, so there wasn't much commentary there. And luckily, the gas giants didn't spot X yet. But X sure spotted them, though making no attempt to get closer to them.

"WHAT! EVERYONE IS OUT OF THEIR ORBITS!"

Wonder who said that one.

Lyric then announced, "Okay, so how this works: You, the reader, will ask or dare anyone of these characters, and they'll have to do them—"

That speech was interrupted by a loud "Wait a minute—I won't do anything some of Earth's lice tell me to do".

"... Continuing on, they have to do the ask and dares," Lyric said. "Any character on the show. And any of the 'hypothetical' planets, stars, and moons, who didn't appear in the show yet."

"What does that mean?" Jupiter asked.

"And that's all for this chapter!" said the Earthling. "Please comment asks and dares, I'm in desperate need for friends."

The camera turns off.