Big Book of Solarballs

Earth Ate A Pair of Skechers

I swear I remember it being called "Sketchers", I think it's some mandela effect type shksh

I have no idea if this chapter takes place with them as humans or planets, so lets just say it's a mix of both at different times-

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"So let me get this straight," Jupiter gets up from his desk. "You swallowed a pair of shoes from one of your Earthling stores, somehow, and now when you even move, your whole surface glows up and you feel light-headed?"

Earth sheepishly grins, "Ah, ha... Crazy, right?"

Jupiter sets his glasses down and rubs his temples. "Earth... I don't know what you want me to say. That's actually a very dumb move."

"Hey, in my defense, a group of middle schoolers were throwing their shoes across their school yard, and it landed where my mouth should be."

Venus busts the door down and walks right in.

"Wha—Venus!" Mars exclaimed, right behind him. "You just broke Jupiter's door!"

Venus replies with, "No, really?"

Jupiter puts his glasses back on and sighs. "Someone get me some Advil..."

"I prefer Pepto Bismol," Earth said, resting his head on his hand.

His surface started glowing up from the movement.

"What the..." Venus doesn't know whether to be in disbelief or find it cool.

He found it cool. But, of course, he wasn't going to inflate Earth's already light year sized ego.

Mars, on the other hand, looked concerned. "Earth! What the—Why are you glowing? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, Mars."

"Alright, you reckless idiot, how the BALL are you glowing?" Venus asked.

Earth sat up straight, causing him to glow again, and he put on a proud smile, "I survived falling into the sun."

Jupiter, who was searching for some medicine for Earth's Skechers Inhalation in one of his cabinets, spoke up. "He swallowed a pair of a light-up sneakers as a result of some middle schoolers on his surface throwing their shoes."

"HA!" Venus started snickering.

Earth rolled his eyes, "My version was a lot cooler. Thanks, Jupiter."

"Okay, uh, so how are you gonna stop lighting up?" Mars asked.

"I'm trying to find a cure for it," Jupiter told him. "But, anyways, what brings you here, Venus and Mars?"

"We needed help from Earth. Venus threw the the Space Poker cards, and Mercury, into the Asteroid Belt," Mars explained.

"Couldn't you, I dunno, get them back yourselves?" Earth asked, raising an eyebrow, surface still glowing. "I'm in a situation here!"

"No! Because I can't go that far in the Asteroid Belt without the Sun immediately feeling the pull and going balls," Venus grumbled. "And RecklessIdiot.2 is scared to go in there, for whatever reason."

"I told you, Venus! Ceres lives in the Asteroid Belt!"

"I told you, Mars. I don't know who that is. But I bet it's some small pipsqueak and you're being a total scaredy-planet."

Jupiter raised an eyebrow, momentarily stopping his search for Earth's medicine. "Wait. Mars, you're scared of Ceres?"

"Well, he threw an asteroid at me," Mars says, slightly cringing from how trivial of a reason that was.