Shades of Redemption

46

I moved around the kitchen, trying to steady my hands as I made mac 'n cheese for Gavin and me. It was his favorite dish—the one he always asked for when we were together. Memories flooded back as I stirred the pasta, thinking about how things used to be, how simple it all seemed back then. But now, everything felt so heavy, so complicated.

When I placed the bowl in front of him, he smiled at me, that same smile that used to make me feel safe. 

"You still make the best mac 'n cheese," he said, his eyes lighting up like nothing had changed between us.

"I'm glad you like it," I replied, forcing a smile of my own. 

Inside, I felt like I was barely holding it together. Between the situation with Gavin, the lies I'd told, and the conversation I needed to have with Elijah, it felt like the walls were closing in.

"Let's watch our favorite movie," Gavin suggested, his voice full of excitement. "You know, A Walk to Remember."

I froze for a second, feeling a pang in my chest. Of all the things for him to remember, it had to be that movie—the one we used to watch when we were happy, when things between us weren't so broken.

"Sure," I said softly, avoiding eye contact as I set up the movie. 

My hands shook slightly as I fumbled with the remote, trying to keep it together. We settled on the couch, Gavin digging into his food with enthusiasm. For a moment, it felt like old times, like the weight of the past wasn't hanging over us.

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye, watching as he happily ate his mac 'n cheese, completely unaware of the storm swirling inside me. When he finished eating, he looked over at me, a playful glint in his eye. Before I knew it, he reached for my foot, pulling it into his lap.

"Hey! What are you doing?" I asked, startled by the sudden touch.

He chuckled, his fingers already working on massaging my foot. "You look tired. You always loved foot massages, remember? Let me help you relax."

I wanted to pull away, but as his hands pressed into the arch of my foot, I felt myself melting into the couch. It had been so long since someone touched me like this, so long since I allowed myself to relax.

A soft moan slipped out of my mouth before I could stop it, and I immediately bit my lip, embarrassed. Gavin didn't miss it. His hands paused for a moment, and when I looked at him, his eyes had darkened.

"Sophie," he murmured, his voice low and a little dangerous, "if you make another sound like that, I don't think I'll be able to stop myself from doing something bad."

My heart pounded in my chest, and I yanked my foot back, scrambling to my feet. 

"I—I should do the dishes," I stammered, gathering the plates in a hurry. My hands were trembling as I headed to the kitchen, desperately needing space, air—anything to clear my head.

Once in the kitchen, I leaned against the counter, my chest heaving. The feel of his hands on my skin, the tone of his voice—it was too much. I grabbed my phone from my pocket, my fingers shaking as I typed out a message to my friends.