Nirvana one-shots

A new start

Kurt was dead, and Nirvana is over. The band can’t preform without there lead singer- the one that everybody admires and wanted to be- at least until he was found with a busted in bloody head.
Dave had a feeling that something like this was going to happen. He was just trying his best to be hopeful. He knew that Kurt suffered a lot through his life and getting with Courtney was the stupidest thing he ever did. She was what led him to this, and Dave couldn’t help but feel guilty.
He knows it’s not his fault, though. Unlike Krist, who is also on the verge of killing himself. Dave has tried comforting him, but he just wants to be alone. Dave respects that. He just hopes another one of his friends isn’t going to have the same fate.
The only person who is keeping Dave grounded is Pat. Pat Smear joined the band shortly before Kurt’s death because Kurt and Dave looked up to him. He was good at what he did, and Kurt always wanted a four-member band. 
Dave feels guilty that Pat just joined, and the band is already gone. It’s not his fault that Kurt couldn’t take living anymore. Pat’s also a mess right now. Even if he is upset as well, he’s trying his best to help Dave and even Krist.
This had made Dave start to think. He knows that he loves music too much to just quit. Dave also doesn’t want to join another band. He wants to make his own band. 
 He has a feeling that he will always be in Kurt’s shadows, though. He doesn’t want his band to be “Nirvana 2.0.” He wants it to be his own thing. He has decided on the name Foo Fighters and Dave is going to do everything in his power to make sure that it isn’t the same as Nirvana. 
Dave isn’t sure who he will let in his band. Krist already said no. But there is one person that Dave needs in his band. That’s Pat.
Pat is great at what he does, and Dave knows that he would support him through things. He’s currently waiting for Pat to come here and talk to him. Dave couldn’t help but be anxious. If Pat rejects him, then he isn’t sure what he would do with his band. He might just have to scrap it.
“Sorry I was late.” Pat said as he headed inside Dave’s room. “The media won’t leave us alone…” 
Dave nodded. “I’m so sick of them. They should let Kurt and us rest. Krist is already having breakdowns because of all the accusations of him and Kurt.” 
“Poor Krist….” Pat sighed. "I have been trying to keep up contact with him, but he hasn’t responded. Is he doing, okay?” 
“He’s doing as okay as he can.” Dave replied. “He did just lose the guy he loved the most.” 
There was an awkward silence in the room until Pat cleared his throat and stared to speak. 
“So, what do you want to talk about? Hopefully not Kurt. I don’t want to talk about him anymore. I’m sick of this…” 
Even if Pat didn’t know Kurt personally that much, it was clear he cared about him. Despite his drug abuse and trauma, Kurt was a person that a lot of people were drawn to.
“It’s not about Kurt. Don’t worry.” 
Dave forced away his worries and tried to make himself sound confident. If he sounds like a muttering idiot, he knows that Pat wouldn’t even consider this.
“I want you to join my band.” Dave blurted. “I’m making a band named Foo Fighters and I’m gathering up members. Krist said that he wasn’t going to be in it, but I at least want you there. I don’t want us to be another Nirvana. I want us to have our own style and name, and I think you could help me with that. So would you want to join me?” 
After those words left his mouth Dave anxiously waited. Every second that went by without Pat saying anything just made Dave feel more scared.
“Of course I’ll join.” Pat said to Dave’s relief. “I wasn’t even in Nirvana for long before all of this… happened. I would love to be a part of Foo Fighters.” 
“Thank you.” 
For once since Kurt’s death, Dave felt a weight off his chest. Pat smiled and just looked down at Dave. 
Dave felt butterflies eat up his stomach as he looked at Pat. He was just so sweet…. He is older than Dave. But Dave doesn’t care. Almost everybody in this industry is older than him. He kind of likes that. He likes older men because they sort of act like mentor figures. But Dave thinks he considers Pat more of a mentor figure. 
He loves him.
Dave has felt this feeling before with several of his exs. He knows that it is love. He’s openly bisexual. A lot of people thought that he was in love with Kurt or Krist. Which wasn’t entirely true. He loved them. But not romantically. They were just his best friends who he messed around with. 
He hasn’t known Pat personally for that long. He has a feeling that if he confesses, he’s just going to get rejected. Besides, it’s hard for him to stay loyal and committed to one person. But he would try for Pat.
“What’s on your mind, Dave?” Pat asked.
Dave blinked, taken back by Pat speaking. It seems that Pat knows him better than anybody else.
“Nothing is on my mind.” Dave said quickly.
He figured that telling Pat he loved him right now wasn’t going to be a good idea. Especially since Pat wouldn’t share his feelings.
“Please don’t lie to me.” Pat urged. “I can tell that something is wrong. Is it about Kurt? The band? Something else?” 
“You.” Was all Dave could say.
Pat tilted his head. “Me? What did I do? Did I do something wrong?” 
“No, you didn’t do anything wrong…” 
Dave hesitated, not knowing what to say. He wanted to just tell Pat the truth. That he loves him. But he was so afraid.
“Just please tell me.” Pat urged. “You aren’t going to feel better until you do.” 
“I love you…” 
“I love you too, Dave.” Pat replied. “I don’t know why you were worried to tell me that. We tell each other that all the time.” 
Dave sighed. “Not like that, Pat… Not like that. I don’t love you in the way I love Krist or Kurt. I… love you more than that.” 
“Like in a romantic way?” Pat asked.
Dave gulped. “In a romantic way.” He confirmed.
Dave tried to read Pat’s face, but he couldn’t. He had no idea what was going on in Pat’s head right now.
“I’m much older than you.” Pat told him.
“it’s only ten years.” Dave argued. “And even then, I’m an adult that can make my own choices. It isn’t like I’m a kid.” 
“Well, you are a kid to me.” Pat chuckled. “You’re lucky. I do love you back though.” 
Dave’s heart was pounding. He didn’t know how to respond. He wondered if Pat was just saying that to make him feel better.
“You don’t have to lie to me.” Dave muttered out. “I know that Kurt just died but the truth isn’t going to hurt me.” 
“I am telling you the truth.” Pat told him. “I wouldn’t lie to you. I love you too.” 
“So, what are we?” Dave asked.
“I don’t know.” Pat admitted. “Do you like… want to date? Or do you want to just… remain as friends? It would be hard to do that though, knowing that we both share feelings for each other.”
“I want to date you, but the media is having a hay day over Kurt’s death, and I don’t want to give them more substance.” Dave sighed. “How about we just wait until all of this dies down if that’s okay.” 
“That’s fine with me.” Pat smiled. “I love you. Everything will be okay.” 
“I hope it will…” 
“Come here, Dave.” Pat said, opening his arms. “Come into my arms.” 
Wrapping his arms tightly around Pat, Dave smiled. Even if Kurt is dead, he and Pat are going to have a new start. They will start Foo Fighters and will be together. At least until Dave messes everything up.