Sorry Not Sorry

-13 🥣

"Thank you! Anyway, I won't keep you waiting, bye Xavier" he smiles and waves as I walk off to the car with my mum. I wave back, grinning.

Why is my life such a roller coaster?

-

I wake up Friday morning with puffy red eyes, a croaky throat and a dripping nose that feels like I'll never breath again.

Mum left for work before I woke up, so I'm all alone at home. I cough, defeated, and pull my sketchbook off of my table. I open it on my lap with a groan, flipping through the pages. I had an idea for and artwork last night, which I wrote down in my notes app. I turn my phone on, ignoring my notifications and opening the notes app.

I click on the first note as look through it. I pick my pencil up, starting to sketch some thumbnails. It was an idea for a spread across two pages, featuring my three OCs I'd told Max about the other day.

My eyelids droop and I decide I'm definitely not in the right shape to do anything right now. I yawn, my throat sending a jolt through my body. I go out to the kitchen, pulling out the kettle. I turn it on and wait for it to heat up. Mum always made me hot Milo before bed when I was sick, and it usually helps.

I sip the hot drink, sitting on the table. My phone vibrates on the table next to me, and I blink my eyes to focus on the screen. It's a call from Max. I was going to let it ring out but I realise it might be important so I pick up.

"Uh-" I croak, coughing. "Hi."

"Oh god, are you okay?" Max says, sounding concerned. "I've been waiting for you at the bus stop for ten minutes... seems like you won't be coming." He says.

"Coming where?" I yawn, sipping the milo.

"Class? Self defense class?" He says, repeating it.

"Oh." My stomach growls. "I- I won't be coming."

"Figures. Get well soon, if you need anything, tell me."

"How would you even give it to me?" I say, deadpan.

"I mean, you could tell me your address." He said. "Not forcing of course, I know some people don't want people they practically just met knowing where they live, but just if you need."

"Yeah, not happening." I say. "Thanks for the offer, though." I add, realising I sound rude. "I'll see you another time, have fun." I hang up, before bursting into a fit of coughs. I finish my chocolatey drink in one last big gulp. "Not happening." I repeat quietly to myself as I waddle back into my room.

-

He knocks on my door ten minutes after I send him the text. My mum apparently has dinner after RSPCA with her friends, so she won't be home for hours, and I was in desperate need for some soup.

I slide out of bed, wrapped in my duvet. I click open the lock to the frount door, letting Max into my house for the first time ever. "Hi." I say, holding the corners of he blanket up to my chin.

"Hey, Xavier." Max says with a chuckle. "Are you cold?" He asks, eyeing the duvet.

"Actually really hot." I say.

He just chuckles. He puts his bag down on he floor next to his feet, grabbing the corners of the blanket and pulling them up to my face. "I'll get that soup cooking for you, alright?" He says, "Sit on the couch."

"Wait." I tug in his sleeve like a child. "Can you get my phone from my room? It's the only one down the hallway with the door open." I say.

"Of course. Sit down." He disappears down the hall for a while, and I eventually grow impatient. I pull myself off the couch with my wobbly legs, leaving the heavy blanket behind. I shudder at the cool breeze coming through the window.

I find Max at my desk, holding a book. "Is this new?" He says, turning to so me the book.

"Oh, I bought it after you showed me yours the other day. It looked good."

"That was really fast." He says, stroking the cover with his thumb. "Anyway, where is your phone? I couldn't find it."

I waddle over to my bed, pulling my pillow up to reveal my phone. "Huh." I sigh.

"How'd you know it was under there?"

"Nyeahhhhh.... I dunno." I groan.

He chuckles. "I'll get the soup."

-

My mum gets home at midnight, finding Max and I sitting in the couch watching The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and me sipping soup.

"Oh, Max! What're you doing here? You shouldn't have to look after my son." She laughs.

My eyes are drooping and I'm barely awake, my head is testing on Max's shoulder, just like the other day. He mimes a joking 'shh' motion with his finger, and my mum walks away with a smile.

-

Even later, mums gone to bed, the tv shut off and is on sleep mode, and Max and I are also on sleep mode, our heads resting against each other's.

The lights have been shut off and the blankets in a heap on the floor. I'm in some odd state between sleeping and awake, where I can hear Max's slow intake and outtake of breath, and crickets chirping outside. One of the neighborhood dogs bark outside, and some birds call out through the night.

Max's silky black hair is all in my face, but I don't want to move to get it out. At least now I'll be able to tell someone that Max's hair smells like Lemon Candy. While Max's breathing is slow and steady, mine is a snotty, snorting kind of breathing. My skull rests upon Max's shoulder, and his head is leaning slightly on mine.

Max groans, turning over slightly. I snort in another breath, drifting in and out of sleep.

-

I wake for good to geckos clicking outside, and a magpie warbling. Max's hand is draped over my shoulder, and I see his fingers twitch.

I sit up slowly with a snotty yawn. "Good morning." I turn to face him.

-