Sorry Not Sorry

-14 🦎

I wake up to geckos clicking outside, and a magpie warbling. Max's hand is draped over my shoulder, and I see his fingers twitch.

I sit up slowly with a snotty yawn. "Good morning." I turn to face him.

-

"Ngh-" he yawns, stretching his arms like in stereotypical TV shows. "Hmm. We probably shouldn't have slept like that" he stands, cracking his back. "The Real Housewives was good though. I'll probably get sick now but who cares."

I blow my nose. I don't feel as bad today, but my nose is still a bit blocked and I'm hot.

Max flops back down in the coach, crossing his legs on the footrest in frount of him, arms behind his head. I grimace after noticing he slept in socks. "You slept in socks?" I say, clearly judging.

He chuckles, "I didn't want to put my bare, dirty feet all over your house on my first visit." He said.

"Fair." I yawn. "I feel a bit better." I say.

"That's good." Max smiles, "what do you want me to do?" He asks.

"Huh?"

"Do you want me to stay? Leave? Make you breakfast?" He says.

"Oh, haha. I dunno... You do what you wanna."  I shrug.

"Do you want me here?" He asks, turning his head to face me.

I shrug again. "Sure. Yeah. Just... If I start getting defensive, just pick up and leave."

He nods, smiling. "Is your mum here?" He asks.

"Uh-" I look at the clock "She would've left for work like an hour ago. She does it like, everyday."

He nods. "Cool. What would you like for breaky?"

"Uh, I'm not sure. Probs just some weetbix. Two with milk."

He guts up and walks into my kitchen. He opens my pantry, and after looking for a while, eventually pulls out the box of Weetbix. He grabs out two and puts them in the bench he bends over and pulls a bowl out. "Cereal or milk first?" He asks me.

I raise my eyebrow at him from over the back of the couch. "Does it really matter?" I say.

He acts hurt, cluching his heart with a hand as pouring the milk into the bowl, the cereal already in. "It does matter, and that was a test. That reveals lots about you, yknow." He says looking up at me.

"Was my answer... Good?" I break away from his peircing gaze, looking away. "Probably not, with the way you reacted." I roll my eyes with a chuckle.

"Not good. I'd be able to tell better if you'd had a definitive view, but alas." He plops a spoon in the bowl and walks it over to me. "Hope you don't mind, I grabbed some Nutri-grain." He says, shaking the little dish full of Nutri-grain he has.

He hands me the bowl, and I flip over to sit on the couch normally. "Why would I mind your feeding yourself." I say. "In  fact, you could have more. Surely that tiny dish isn't enough?"

"I'm not all that hungry." He says.

"You really eat it dry?" I say, swallowing a bite of my Weetbix.

"Yeah. best way for Nutri-grain. Makes a great healthy snack too."

"I'll have to try it some time." I say. I notice him gazing out the window. "What's on your mind?"

"Could you tell me more about the orphanage?" He says. "What... What was it like?"

"I dunno, what do you wanna know?"

"Anything."

"Well, most of the kids were good. Everyone was pretty sad, considering we'd all been left, but there were no bullies, everyone looked after each other. It's an odd situation to be in for a younger children especially, but we got through." I explain, deciding to leave out Ronnie.

"Were the workers good?" He asks.

I shrug. "Good. Underpaid, yeah. But good." I nod. "Why? Curious?"

"Uh... " he fights with his fingers. "It's just... Whenever I disagreed with my parents... They'd always threatened to send me to an orphanage, you know... That kinda thing. Uh- I was just wondering hew different my life might've been if they went through with the threats."

I look at him, putting my spoon down in the bowl. "Want to talk about it?" I ask, turning in the couch to face my body at him.

"I dunno. I don't want to be a bother." He shrugs.

"You're not a bother." I say. "If you want to to tell me, tell me."

"My parents weren't the best." He said. Immediately sinking back  into the couch, giving in. "I guess that could be all Asian families, but I dunno." He shrugs. "They were kind like Crazy rich Asians, I guess- well, I've never watched it, but based on the title- they were wealthy, and pretty strict and... Yknow, unaccepting. When I came out to them- as big, by the way... They'd kinda ignored me in a way to forget what I'd told them, but eventually it got out too extended family and I was kicked out... I lived with Kitty and her Dad."

I gulp. It's tragic. Its heartbreaking to know that some people still aren't supportive,  even if it truly doesn't even effect them. I want to reach out and squeeze his hand, but considering the fact he basically just came out to me I thought thatd seem weird. Also, that's news to me. I hadn't known all that much about Kitty but knowing she has a single father makes me feel a bit better. Also, I didn't expect Max go be Bi,  but I can't say I'm dissapointed...

I settle for bumping his leg with mine instead. "It's so bogus to me that some people don't support now." I hiss. "I mean, it's the twenty first century! Get a grip." I shake my head. I look back up at him, my eyes shining. "Thank you for telling me."

He nods his head, looking out the window. "Its not a big deal. Thanks for listening."

"Its a big deal to me." I say. "No one should be treated like that. How old even where you when the kicked you out?"

"Seventeen" he says "I moved into my own house a year later- then after that Danny and I got our house."

I can't stop myself. I reach out and grab his hands with mine, squeezing. "You didn't deserve any of that."

-