Chasing Shadows

Chapter Thirty: Shadows of Guilt

Ethan stood in the hallway, the weight of the moment pressing down on him like a leaden shroud. He could still feel the echoes of his panic, the heat of the flames he’d unleashed, and the screams that had haunted him just moments before. He trembled, a raw fear coursing through him, the memory of blood staining his hands seared into his mind.

Zane held him tightly, his body radiating warmth, a stark contrast to the icy grip of terror that clenched Ethan’s heart. “Ethan,” Zane whispered, his voice soothing and steady, anchoring Ethan in the chaos. “Just breathe. You’re safe now.”

But even Zane’s comforting presence couldn’t dispel the visions that danced at the edges of Ethan’s mind—the sight of the man collapsing, the flames devouring him, and the echo of that horrible scream. “It’s on me… I can’t…” Ethan muttered, his hands shaking uncontrollably. He stared at his palms, convinced he could see the remnants of a crime that felt insurmountable.

“Listen to me,” Zane urged, his grip tightening slightly. “You’re okay. There’s nothing on you. It’s all in your head. Just focus on my voice.”

Ethan’s breaths came in ragged gasps, his heart racing. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the images that refused to fade. “I didn’t mean to… I didn’t want to…”

“I know,” Zane said softly. “But you did what you had to do to save her. You were brave, Ethan. You saved that woman.”

But bravery felt like a bitter pill to swallow when it had resulted in death.

With each passing second, the heat of the moment began to cool, though the icy fingers of guilt clung stubbornly to Ethan’s mind. He wanted to believe Zane, wanted to find comfort in those words, but all he could feel was the weight of his actions pressing down on him, suffocating him.

Time slipped away, the chaos of the world outside slowly filtering back into Ethan’s consciousness. He felt Zane’s arms relax around him, a sign that he was easing his grip, but the warmth he provided was slowly replaced by a hollow emptiness that echoed the guilt in Ethan’s heart.

Eventually, Zane pulled back, his eyes searching Ethan’s for a flicker of understanding. “You should get out of here. Get somewhere safe. I’ll… I’ll stay back. Just go find Asher.”

Ethan’s heart sank. Asher. The hero. The one person who would never understand what he had done. Zane’s words felt like a lifeline, but they also felt like a betrayal—how could he face Asher after this?

Yet, in that moment, Zane’s eyes held a warning. “If you stay here, he’ll see you and… things will get complicated. Just go.”

Ethan nodded slowly, his throat tight, and he forced himself to turn away. He stepped into the hallway, each step feeling heavier than the last, the echoes of the past still whispering in his ear.

The sun was setting when he finally emerged from the building, and he squinted against the sudden brightness. A crowd had gathered outside, a mass of bodies cheering and shouting, celebrating the end of the nightmare. Ethan felt like a ghost, slipping through the throngs of jubilant faces, their joy a stark contrast to the turmoil inside him.

And there was Asher, standing tall amidst the crowd, a wide smile plastered across his face as he waved at his fans. He looked every bit the hero—the embodiment of everything Ethan admired, everything he wished he could be.

But as Ethan drew closer, the weight of his silence became unbearable. Asher noticed him, his smile faltering just a fraction. “Ethan!” he called out, rushing over, his enthusiasm radiating off him like sunlight. “You won’t believe the crowd! They’re so grateful—”

Ethan forced a smile, but it felt like a mask slipping on over the cracks in his heart. “Yeah… I’m glad,” he managed, his voice barely above a whisper. Inside, he felt hollow, the cheers of the crowd fading into an echoing silence as he tried to make sense of it all.

Asher’s eyes narrowed slightly, concern creeping in. “You okay, buddy? You look a little pale.”

“Just tired,” Ethan replied, his stomach churning at the lie. He couldn’t tell him the truth—not now, not ever. He couldn’t shatter Asher’s image of him, not when he’d worked so hard to stand in his shadow.

Asher nodded, though his expression was still tinged with worry. “You sure? I mean, after everything that just happened, it’s okay to be shaken up. I’d be worried if you weren’t.”

Ethan nodded, forcing the smile a little wider. “Really, I’m fine. Just… a little overwhelmed.”

Before Asher could say more, a commotion erupted from the crowd, drawing his attention. He glanced back, grinning at the cheering people who adored him. “I’ll be right back! Just need to check on a few things!”

Ethan stood frozen, watching Asher disappear into the throng. He felt so out of place among the crowd, his heart heavy with the secrets he couldn’t share. As he turned away, he caught sight of Zane lingering at the edge of the gathering, his eyes dark and calculating, watching the scene unfold with a smirk that twisted Ethan’s gut.

Suddenly, the thrill of celebration turned into a burden, and Ethan’s heart raced as he moved away from the crowd, desperate to escape the reality of what had happened. But no matter how far he ran, the guilt would follow him, lurking like a shadow at the back of his mind.

Later, when the crowd had begun to dissipate and the sun dipped below the horizon, Ethan found himself standing alone on a street corner, his heart racing as he thought of what had happened inside that building.

Could he ever escape it?

It was then that he realized he wasn’t the only one feeling the weight of the moment.

The confrontation with Zane had yet to come, and the night still held secrets that had yet to unravel. But Ethan felt one thing distinctly—this night would change everything.

As he stood there, the silence pressing in, the realization washed over him: he was trapped between two worlds—the hero and the villain—and the line that divided them had never felt so thin.

With a heavy heart, Ethan began to walk away from the crowd, ready to face the shadows of his choices. Asher, Zane, and the blood that stained his soul would all come to a head soon enough. But for now, all he could do was keep moving forward.