The Second Chance of A Suicidal Idol

Ryeo Hyun (4)

"Ryeo Hyun, I'm gonna be straight with you..." Xe's CEO spoke in a low tone. It was two weeks before the Producer10 auditions and Ryeo Hyun had been pulled out of vocal lessons. "This show will likely be your last chance at debuting."

He felt as if his whole world had ended there.

He had been a trainee for a decade now, since middle school. He had worked his body to shreds and been cut from his agency's debut teams twice due to a lacking image. He clenched his fists. His vocal cords ached with practice and when he bowed his head low for the CEO in front of him, he couldn't find it in himself to rebel.

"Yes, thank you." Ryeo Hyun replied, but he was really anything but. "I will do my best."

Ryeo Hyun recalled the memory as he traversed the only slightly busy night streets of Seoul. The meeting he had just had was just simple questioning on the truth of the situation and the accusations. But based on the way things were swaying, wasn't it over for him?

He recalled his years as a trainee. Being 13 and sitting in on his first dance practice, being 14 and making his first trainee friends. He recalled the day Bo Jaesang walked into the practice room with looks people gawked at as average. He recalled the same day where he found Bo Jaesang crying at the agency's stairwell.

His cries echoed throughout and caught Ryeo Hyun's attention well. They were sad tears, small but said enough. He replayed the moment in his head.

"Are you..." Ryeo Hyun recognized the boy as the new trainee that their teacher had introduced this morning. Was he 11? 12? Ryeo Hyun recognized the boy as just a few years younger. "Are you okay?"

Bo Jaesang looked from the ball he had made himself and Ryeo Hyun was surprised to see his eyes red with tears. 'S-Sunbae..." He replied, as if surprised.

But that surprised expression quickly shifted to a face of tears, winced eyes and all. "How, how're you so good?" Bo Jaesang asked.

Ryeo Hyun was taken aback by the words. He? Good? Granted he had the most experience out of all others' his age, but he was nothing compared to the actual debuted idols in the company. He shook his head, "What do you mean?"

"You're so much better than me, everyone is..." Bo Jaesang cried muffled tears into himself.

Ryeo Hyun recalled the class he had just taken with the other. He was new and it was clear in his stiff dance, but he wasn't terrible. Not to mention it was his first official day here, so why was this kid stressing so hard? Every trainee begun a newbie, but grew to be something better.

Still, Ryeo Hyun understood it slightly. It was normal for every newer trainee to feel inferior to the more experienced trainees, especially if you were similar in age. He, too, had felt that inferiority but had worked past it by getting to their level and higher.

He sighed, the younger boy continued to cry as if Ryeo Hyun wasn't even there. 'So much for pre-teen masculinity...' Ryeo Hyun scoffed.

He sighed, and took a seat on the stairs beside the younger. "Hey, don't cry..." Ryeo Hyun spoke, lightly patting at the boy's back. "I– It's normal..." The comforting words felt uncomfortable coming off a tongue as monotone as his.

"Normal to what? Have crappy dance?" Bo Jaesang muttered.

Gosh, Ryeo Hyun was terrible at this. "No, normal like that. But it's normal to feel, you know, inferior..."

Bo Jaesang shook his head, his cries slowing. "What?"

"Every new trainee compares themselves too much to the more experienced ones. You can't help it because we are always grouped together. But with time you will get better..." Ryeo Hyun racked his brain for the right words.