Damaged Hearts

Chapter 10

Nicole

Brian has the kids this weekend which works out great considering it's moving day. Time to finally get out of my parent's place and have a space of our own. I'm looking forward to it but also a little nervous. It's in town, small space, kids have to share a room, and the kitchens about the same size as the bathroom. I know I'll make it work but it's a major downsize compared to where we used to live.

"Here we are, put us to work." I hear Zach say. I head over to the propped open front door and he brought Kelly.

"Nice to meet you finally! I'm Nicole!" I shake her hand, she smiles and says the same thing back to me. She's cute, I can see why he likes her.

"Finally out of hiding I see." Trent interrupts and introduces himself to her too.

"I really wasn't hiding I swear!" Kelly laughs defending herself.

"They're kidding babe." Zach puts his arm around her shoulder and rubs it playfully. I honestly can't even remember the last time I saw him with a girlfriend. Years. And I don't even remember her name or what she hardly looked like because I only met her once. The bigger question is...would I feel this jealous of her if I'd still be married or is this a new thing. Right now I don't even know how to act.

"Oh my gosh! You brought her! Finally!" Cassidy exclaims and comes out over.

"I had no idea how popular I was." Kelly laughs and eyes Zach and he shrugs

"Yeah alright let's get back to work. Nicole wants to be moved in by midnight." Trent jokes and heads back inside.

The guys do the lifting, us girls do the labeling and organizing. It's only gonna take about 2 truck loads I think to get everything over there.

"You excited to get away from your parents and back on your own?" Trent asks me on the drive over. Its just us so it's kinda nice to talk to him one on one.

"Yes and no. It all feels a little too real now, not sure I like it."

"What do you mean?"

"Well living there felt and was so temporary and now moving here is going to be a new permanent. Old permanent was our house, ya know?"

"Oh yeah, you feel like you wanna go back to your old permanent?"

"Yeah but obviously not in the current conditions of everything..." I say looking down and playing with my hands.

"Right...I'm sorry. I wish that was the case."

His words are like the password to my tear ducts. I start crying, through a breaking voice I say "Why do I feel like the worst person in the world? I failed as a wife, my kids are going to hate me and hate this new house, they're not gonna wanna live here with me, they're-"

"Hey, hey now." Trent grabs my hand. "Nicole you are an awesome mom and you were a great wife. Don't say that about yourself. Those kids are lucky to have you and Brian was too. You didn't cause the divorce, nothing you did made him cheat. Nothing."

"If I would've been more loving or more-"

"No. A cheater is gonna cheat no matter what. No matter how amazing the women you got at home is."

"But I could've been so much better, I could've let more go and tried to serve him more."

"No no no. You're gonna stop with that nonsense right now. Don't." He says and I don't say anything, just try and take some breaths to calm myself down. Why I felt so comfortable crying like this infront of Trent is beyond me but whatever. I guess it was built up so much it had to come out. I feel the truck stop moving, naturally I think we're at my new place but when I look up I see that we're not. He pulls off to the side of the road and turns the hazards on. Confused, I watch him get out and round to my side. He opens my door, takes my hand, pulls me out of the truck and hugs me.