Damaged Hearts

Chapter 17

Nicole

"What do you mean a problem? He's your boyfriend, you're supposed to want to jump his bones." Cassidy assures on the other end of the phone.

I laugh to myself, "I know but like I've never had so much sex in this short of a time period before in my life. Not even with Brian, newly together, college days."

"So, Zach's just a better lay, that's all."

"Yeah but like I don't just crave his dick, I want his attention too. I just like to be around him whenever I can.

"Nicole, that's a good thing. You're supposed to be like that in the beginning, honeymoon phase. I wish I was still like that. Trent pisses me off so much sometimes I'm like just get out of my face, you know?"

"Ha, no I know. We haven't had any fights or anything yet but I honestly don't know what we would fight about. Everything just seems so..."perfect."

"Give it time." Cassidy says ruining the moment but I laugh. I know she's right. Everyone fights eventually

"I just...I feel more than lust, we have this connection, I can't explain it." I sigh.

"You think you're in love with him!?"

"Maybe..."

"Nicole!" She yells at me with a laugh.

"That's why I'm freaking out. It hasn't even been 6 months, that's way too soon, the kids don't even know, it's just wrong."

"Hold up, let's not forget that you are a whole grown ass women. You don't need anyone to know who you're fucking on the weekends. Especially the kids."

"I know. I just, ugh. Maybe I should talk to him." I mumble.

"Talk to him about what?"

"If he feels the same."

"No, don't do that. He'll tell you when he's ready."

"But what if he's thinking the same thing I am? What if we're both just not saying it because we're scared."

"Okay then sure, be bold. I don't know. I'm just not like that. I'd rather be chased." She says with an entitlement to her tone, I laugh to myself.

"Yeah, okay well I'll figure something out, thanks." I say and we hang up just in time for the kids bus to pull up.

It's been 2 weeks since Zach and I first had sex and we've done it every time we've seen each other since. I'm addicted to him like a drug. He knows exactly what I want in each moment. The best part is he knows how to not just make me feel good but how to make me feel sexy. I know after kids my body is much different then it used to be and with Brian, I always felt it. He never was good at affirmations or giving me the confidence. Probably because deep down he didn't find me attractive anymore, which lead to cheating.

I head into my bathroom to get a shower before Brian drops the kids off from the weekend. I look at myself in the mirror. Opening my phone camera, I hold it up for a close up of my cleavage just peaking out the top of my shirt. I hook it down slightly with a finger and snap it.

"Your pillows are going to be lonely tonight." I text and hit send.

I turn the shower on, undress and then start brushing my hair out. When my phone dings. I laugh to myself. I hadn't even got in the shower yet.

It's Zach, "Fuck, you're ruining me."

Smiling to myself I reply, "That's the plan ;-)"

"I can't even focus now. I just want to bury my face between them."