My Mother's Secret - A Sequel To The Summer of 1993

A Warm Christmas

It was warm. It was more like March. I:fact, my crocus were,beginning to grow. Mom and I still worked part time. It was nice to spend time with her and Joey, who REALLY looked like Johnny. Dad loved him though, he mentioned he never knew how much he would love me and I "was not blood". He began to say that about Joey. Every evening when I was there, he held Joey and talked to him. He said women were "very strange creatures", but lovely.

It was Christmas and we all,drove to the Chinese buffet on Washington. It was loud, hot, and crowded. My grandparents got us a table in back. We barely fit. It was awful and my dad bitched the whole time. I could tell mom was frustrated. Johnny calmed her, but Steve seemed to frustrate her. Joey cried the whole time and dad was "so embarrassed". It was loud and he just got over a major illness....  Mom still looked exhausted.   My grandparents  just loved that her sister was up to as she was one of the rope performers at Monticello financial and mom was struggling.  Well, at  least her belly wasn't cancer.   Mom was irritable.  I felt bad for her.  I just wanted to hug her. 

    Johnny texted a marry Christmas.   I texted back.  I hadn't heard from him in a while.  I showed him Joey and mom.  There was no answer.  Joey was asleep.  Finally.   Mom had a blonde wig and looked so sweet.   Patti was giving her the weekends all day, but it wasn't her county salary.   She said she would be sort time until Joey turned one.   It was a sacrifice to raise him.  Mom was depressed.   She helped us when we were broke.  Now we were helping her.  

    Mom hoped for money but she got a bunch of crap gifts.   Mom just wanted her bills paid.  I asked Johnny for he,o with that. I was scared, but he said, "yes".  "I still adore her and wished things were different.  I would have swooped in had she been single," he said.  He said "saw her" over the holidays.   This summer she would be reveled and it would break my mom's heart....    Mom said, "I loved your gifts.   They were from the heart."  She was tired though.   We stayed for a whole, but dad said she was out like a light when she was at home.   I called.  

    "How is mom?"
"Out like a light.   She looks so innocent.  All I can think is 'what a 'ho, then I see that a lot of it is my fault."

   I did not say anything.   It was true.  He then resolved to try to win her back.   "I need her," he said, "bus she dies not want me." I think that started years ago.  I think it began in November of 1996 when they aborted my sister or brother and he was so uncaring.  It was the little things  over the years the just broke her.