Love , Again ?? || RM

Part 50 - Fragments of a Past

Joon Pov

Why am I even thinking about her right now?

As I walk toward the elevator, greeting familiar faces and nodding to a few "hellos," my mind is anything but here. The moment I hit the button for our studio floor, it's like her name fills every corner of my head. Ha Eun. It echoes, loud enough to drown out any other thought, louder with each floor that ticks by. I know I'm supposed to be focused—upcoming workshop or taking care of my self to move on—but she's here, clinging to my thoughts like she's refusing to let go.

Should I see her? The question keeps coming up, digging into me, forcing me to confront the truth of what we had—whatever it even is now. And I can feel it, this tug-of-war inside, my heart saying one thing, my mind another. My heart keeps pushing: You had a bond with her, Namjoon, a real one. You can't just erase that.

I mean, she wasn't just anyone. We shared things I haven't shared with anyone else. She got me. I can still remember the late-night talks, her laughter in the quiet, the times we didn't need words because she just... knew.

But then my mind steps in, cold and practical. She's the one who ruined it, it reminds me. She didn't fight for it she just easily give in by giving her self to someone else when seh was dating me , when i was her man, she hide it all, she could tell me when she did it once but she did it i don't know hiw many time. And namjoonaa stop it now you're here, torturing yourself over someone who's probably already moved on. Why are you still holding on? she want to leave seoul because she want this to end in real

The elevator dings softly, and I lean against the wall, feeling the familiar weight of doubt settling in. Why am I so hung up on her? She could have fixed things. She could have said something. But she didn't. So why am I here, clinging to what could have been?

I step out of the elevator, but my feet feel heavier with every step toward the studio. The buzz of the hallway fades as my mind locks onto one name—Ha Eun. I've told myself a hundred times to let her go, to forget everything we built together. And yet, it's like she's imprinted on every corner of my mind, no matter how hard I try to push her away.

We spent years together, planning a future. We talked about where we'd live, the places we'd go, even how we'd grow old—details most people only dream of. She was my anchor in ways I didn't even realize until she wasn't there anymore. And then, that one night, everything we'd built shattered. She cheated on me. The very thought sends a fresh sting, but somehow, I still find myself stuck between hurt and confusion.