It's Code For You (Parallel NurseryVerse Series)

Chapter 7- Don't Hold Me

The view from their hotel room was stunning. For a moment, Siobhan thought that maybe this would become the new normal. It was all too good to be true, the way that Roger had been treating her. After he came home that night, nothing had been the same. Siobhan had been on edge for the first week or so, sure that it was a trap. But after eight days had passed with no forced activities or new bruises to cover, she felt her guard cautiously drop. That morning in particular had started even better than the last. She had woken up to Roger answering the door to room service, bringing her favorite breakfast to their bed. They had been in London for a week at this point under the guise of a Manager's Conference, something that she had tried desperately hard to sell to Marjorie in hopes she may tell Vivian. She shouldn't have even been thinking about Vivian, not after all of this. She probably wouldn't even speak to her if Siobhan ever could bring herself to answer the phone again. She'd stopped calling after a week- as much as Siobhan hated it, it was probably for the better. She couldn't be what Vivian needed, no matter how much she wished she could be.

"Dearest, I was thinking we could go out for dinner tonight." Roger interrupted the train of thought she had climbed onto. Oddly enough, Siobhan was grateful for it.

"I don't have anything nice packed to wear." She looked past Roger to the closet on the wall.

"Don't you bother your small little mind with that, I will take care of it." Roger spoke smoothly, so smoothly Siobhan almost missed the dig he let slip. Force of habit, she thought. It had to be.

"Will you be planning anything else this evening?" Siobhan attempted to move the conversation along, distract herself from the dancing images still circling her mind.

"I have some business to attend to, I was hoping you wouldn't mind finding something to do on your own for a bit." Roger set his coffee cup down on the table next to their bed. Siobhan nodded slowly. The thought actually thrilled her. Despite the fact that their situation had seemingly changed, she still found herself desiring moments to herself.

"I don't see why not. Give the board my best." Siobhan forced a small smile onto her face. Roger cleared his throat as he stood, almost as if he was trying to swallow words that were trying to fall out.

"Right, I will see you tonight." Siobhan prepared herself for the usual kiss that Roger would press against her cheek, the awful feeling of his mustache against her soft skin, the way his rough lips laid where once there were soft supple lips. But just as she clasped her hands in front of her, fully prepared- Roger strolled past her and directly out the door.

Disappointment wasn't the word she would have used. She wasn't upset by the fact that Roger hadn't kissed her, in fact she was relieved. But something about the way everything was falling together, the lack of some recently occurred behaviors- it all felt like the facade was chipping. She could feel the breeze through the cracks, the heat from the hell that was hiding behind it all. Good things only lasted so long for Siobhan, and she was no stranger to knowing they would soon end.

**

Vivian had stopped smoking years ago, in fact- it was the day she found out she was pregnant with Jamie. She swore that she wouldn't put another foot in the grave by putting poison in her lungs and yet- there she sat... perched on the stairs outside of her flat with a cigarette pressed to her lips. She had no more gotten Jamie down for bed when she was hit with a wave of nausea that made her run for air. The thought of Roger and Siobhan cozied up together on some romantic getaway made her skin crawl. She had to clear her brain, and the only way that she could think to do that was to give herself a nicotine buzz that would drown out all her thoughts. She had hidden this pack from herself the day she stopped, and she was sure that by now it likely had more than one cancer giving property, but she had to do something.