My mind is blank. My feelings are in a different place. Mostly my feelings for The Girl are a jumble but true enough. I love her to death but I think loving her to death will be the death of me one day. There's a difference between being by yourself and being alone. Being by yourself means that you chose to be alone and being alone is....when you don't get the choice to be alone or not. Sometimes I like being by myself and sometimes I like being with other people. I would love to be with another person and live with them and be with them till the end. I'm also very content with being by myself with the rest of time. Enlighten and at peace with myself I would feel no attachment to anyone or anything. I would just have myself and my mind.
I'm terrified of ending up alone but I'm okay with being by myself,it's hard to decide which you truly are when you feel like you can be both. Hmm I will try to tell you something that's true. I love The Girl. I want a relationship with her (we aren't together right now) but at the same time we've been partners through everything for so long I believe that sometimes that we haven't stopped being in a "relationship". Maybe we don't need a relationship to say we that we are "together", my mother and my step dad did this sort of thing for 15 years before my mother re-married to my step dad. I think honestly that wouldn't bug me,as long as I'm with her and that she wants to be with me then I'm set and I'll be okay,hopefully she would be too
YOU ARE READING
"Diary"
RandomI've done diaries in the past but I got the urge to do one again because of mad men. I went straight to the episode of don on his own in his apartment ,writing down his thoughts.
