Being Pure

Chapter Eight: Family First

Chapter Eight: Family First

Dean's POV:

"So this case," I say, sitting down next to Sam. My brother has been sitting at this table looking for a case for hours. It's been a week and he still seems mad at me. He doesn't seem to understand that those people were monsters. Being human doesn't always eliminate you from that category.

"What about it?" Sam doesn't look up from his computer screen. I sigh, leaning back in the chair.

"Is it our kind of thing or are you gonna keep looking?" Sam, finally looking up at me, sighs.

"Dean, we need to talk," he says, closing his computer screen. This is going to be good.

"Okay, look," I say, leaning forward and clasping my hands together. "I know you think that I shouldn't have killed those guys, but it was us or them. For me, that's an easy call. It will be you or Addie every single time. So if you wanna stay pissed with me, fine. But don't lecture me about right and wrong 'cause that goes right out the window when it comes to you two." Sam's eyes look sad. I frown, mad at myself for upsetting him. That's not what I meant to do. But then Sam smiles—sad smile that it is—and says something that I didn't expect.

"I know."

I jump, almost scared by his words. He's my brother and I know he'd do anything for me, but I never thought he would be all right with me killing humans. Sam's always put people first, monster or no monster, and I know it's hard for him whenever we have to kill a human being.

I look down at my hands, smiling slightly. He's more like me than I thought. Then I frown, not liking that thought. I don't want him to be more like me. I want him to be the sweet, kind, fun-loving kid he was when I picked him up from Stanford. But that was a long time ago, and I know that this life has changed him. Maybe even more than it changed me. I've always been like this. Hunting may have shaped me into who I am, but it didn't change me like it did for Sam. I never wanted this for him.

"Then what the hell do you want to talk about?" I lean back, scowling at my brother.

"You and Addison," he says, crossing his arms over his chest. I sigh, hoping he doesn't say what I think he's going to say. "You can't do this to her." Damn it.

"I know," I say, running a hand down my face. He doesn't even have to say what it is. I know he's talking about last week when I told her I just wanted her for sex. I know it was wrong, but what else could I do? She can't get close to me like that. It will end badly.

"Dean, I don't think you do," he says, concern slipping into his words. Pushing his hair out of his face, he leans forward and looks at me with a worried expression. "I know you have feelings for her, and the reason you won't act on them is beyond me, but you can't just lead her on and then say something like that to her. She may hide it well, but she's fragile. I mean, have you heard her?"

"Heard her? What are you talking about?" I lean forward now, curious but mostly worried.

"I'm talking about the nightmares."

"Oh," I say, getting quiet. I know about the nightmares. When we were hunting that spirit in Burwell I woke her up from on of those nightmares. She was terrified and I can't blame her. We never really talked about it, but that was only because I started pushing her away. The dreams are about Jason. That twisted demon that made her pure and then forced her to open the hell gate. When I heard her say his name back at the warehouse, hatred bubbled up to the surface so quickly I nearly snapped. I wanted to kill him so badly and not just because of what he did. Addie's scared of him. I don't want her to be scared of anything. I want to be able to protect her from everything.