We all pretended not to notice the still growing rain clouds as we picked a spot out in the open. Like usual, I walked a good ways away from everyone so I could just sit. Minho shot me a look as I did, a warning not to stay up too late, though I pretended not to notice.
I pretend not to notice lot of things.
It's gonna come back to bite me one day.
I don't care right now. I probably won't until it actually happens.
Sighing, I crossed my legs and stared at nothing, my back turned to everyone.
If there were a backstabber in the group, a traitor, I’d be the perfect target.
I’m not a target though. I’m apparently too busy being forgotten.
Aris’s P.O.V
° ° ° ° ° °
“I can't do this with you anymore. I can't keep doing this. I can't,”She repeated, frantically pacing back and forth.
“Then, walk away. If you can't do this, then leave.”
“I don't want to leave. For the love of-I just want you to understand. You-you never understand. Ever.”
“And you understand me all the time?”
“I listen to you all the time. I have put myself in your shoes and learned about things I’m not supposed to know. What the hell do you mean I don't understand you?”
“Do you really put yourself in my shoes or do you hate them so much that you can't even look at them?”I accused.
“Jesus dude. I can't-I can't with you right now. I ask for space, and this is the damn thanks I get,”She groaned, giving a humorless laugh.
“All you have is space-”
“No, Aris. All you have is space. All the time. I get it. You're lonely and sad, but I am on the verge of always passing out. Can you not understand that I am telling you, not asking, that I will not be seeing anyone for this week? I am exhausted all the time.”
“Then, you can sleep here-”
“So I can be worried that someone's going to catch us or notice my empty bed while I rest? That's the solution?”
“You never told me you felt that way.”
“Because you would react exactly like this. Trust me. I know that you spent a lot of time isolated, but I’m just tired. Can you get out of your world for five minutes and see that?”
“I am always in other people's worlds. All the time. I never get to leave them. Ever.”
“But why do you act like it's my fault? I didn't tell you to find a cure. I didn't force you to devote your life to this. Why do I have to be the bad guy for not putting my all into some stupid cure that may never exist?”
“It's not stupid, and it will exist.”
“See? Do you understand? You are so-I just-I can't even describe you. I can't, I can't, I can't. You're like a puzzle, and I don't even like puzzles.”
“So you don't like me?”
“I fucking love you with all of my heart.”
“But do you like me?”
“Of course I like you, but you are so terrible at dealing with any problems that sometimes I don't think it's that much,”She admitted.
There was no yelling, no raised voices, no tears. Just a raw hurt, like a fresh scrape bleeding on the floor, staining every inch of the ground.
“I love you, but you don't seem to realize how much damage you do. There's never a conversation with you. It's always an argument or doubts or something. It just sucks when I have to say things like I need space or to actually sleep. I already know it's gonna end so much worse than it has to. I don’t know if it's because you’ve been pushed back on your communication and social skills with people your age or if it's because you have to do all this thinking and get in your head when you're so alone, but you need to figure it out. I can't keep doing this with you. I can’t risk losing you every time there's a slight conflict.”
My face felt devoid of all color as I stared at her, taking in her words. All the air seemed knocked out of me as I tried to find the right things to say. Still, I came up completely empty, opening and closing my mouth.
“I’m sorry,”I got out, nearly tripping over the simple two words. Her face remained unchanged. Hurt, pained, tired. “I’m sorry. I love you.”
“You always say that, Aris.”
“I mean it.”
“I’m gonna go now. I’ll see you in about a week.”
“Okay. Get some sleep, mi amor.”
The ghost of a smile crossed her lips at the affectionate name. Then, it disappeared as quickly as she left the room, glancing left then right before walking out.
° ° ° ° °
There are a million reasons to go talk to her. A million reasons to make sure she's alright. And a million more not to.
And she’ll never know any of them.
YOU ARE READING
Someone Worth Lying For
FanficYou escaped the Glade with some of the Glader's.Life has going to get better now.At least, that's what everyone thought.Then, you get woken up in your sleep and assume it's Teresa.Instead, it's a boy you've definitely never seen before.After a littl...
