When You're High on Life

Down Time

Derek, along with Kenny, Gus, Kiara and Knifey, set off on the path back home. Derek used one of Gus' discs to create a platform out of the cavern and into a mineshaft that hopefully led out of there.
As they made their way through, some G3 goons attacked them!
Gus said, "oh, shit! Time to fight! Ha-ho, okay!"
Kiara stabbed one through the eye as Derek used Gus to shoot another one. Gus was very effective, essentially acting like a shotgun, taking out G3 goons with one of two shots. After going through the mineshaft for a few more minutes, they came across one goon across a gap.
Kiara suddenly used her telekinesis to pull the goon close, allowing Derek to shoot him.
Derek said, "whoa! Nice work, Kiara."
Kiara said, "you are most welcome, friend."
Derek smiled at his new partner/friend before they made their way across the gap and used another one of Gus' discs to get up higher. They found themselves in front of some sort of device that could launch a zipline, leading up to a cliff side.
Gus said, "I'm not sure you could jump to that one."
But then they heard an annoying voice that was very familiar to Derek, Kenny and Knifey.
"Oh, hi! It's me, Quentin the Grentin again, your best friend!"
Quentin floated over as Derek groaned, "not again…."
Quentin said, "I actually decided to patch things up and rejoin the G3. Do you mind if I kill you real quick? Hahahaha!"
Quentin tried shooting at them, but Kiara quickly stopped him in place with her telekinesis, allowing Derek to finally shoot the annoying little alien into nothing but a red puddle.
Gus said, "finally! Enough of that guy. They kicked him outta the G3 'cause he was so damn annoying. He's lonely, he's bitter, and…. Get a life! Some people need a life and he needed a life, man!"
Kiara said, "his voice was most unpleasant. I even tried banging my head against a tree in order to block out the noise.”
Derek said, "I thought I heard something slamming their head against a tree earlier. Yeah. He wouldn't shut up for more than one second earlier. Normally I'm not one to randomly shoot someone, but he was REALLY pushing my buttons."
The group then used a nearby console to activate the zipline, giving them a way to cross the gap. Kiara teleported across while Derek used the zipline. When they got across, a small G3 warp base appeared nearby. Derek and his team had to once again take down a large group of goons before they could continue. Soon, they found themselves back in the area from earlier, where a doorway that could warp them back home was.
Derek said, "alright Gus, Kiara, time to head to my house so we can turn in the bounty and then hunt down the next G3 head."
Gus said, "a'ight, I'm down for whatever."
Kiara said, "let us set out then."
Derek used the console on the door to plug in the Blim City coordinates. The doorway activated, creating a glowing purple portal. The group stepped through, and after a few moments of feeling themselves moving everywhere all at once, they were back in Derek's living room.
Derek groaned as he leaned against the doorframe, slowly getting his bearings in the living room, still not quite used to the teleporting he went through. He sincerely hoped he would get used to that. Kiara seemed very unphased by it. But given how she could teleport short distances at will, she was probably used to that stuff.
Gene said, still sitting on the couch across from them, "well, look who's back. You think I'm supposed to be impressed that you killed a G3 officer? Ye-well, d'okay. Yeah, I am. I think it's pretty insane you didn't die. That's all you're gettin' outta me. Now…. Turn that bounty in."
Derek nodded with a slight roll of his eyes as he used the Bounty 5000 to turn in his bounty on Krubis for 1,500 credits, scanning the drill to make sure he had proof.
Derek then placed Kenny and Gene on the table. Derek noticed some changes, such as the place being a little messy, a poster of Tammy and the T-Rex on the wall, and a few of Gene's personal belongings sitting near the stairs.
Derek commented, “I see you've decided your little space around here?”
Gene said, “yeah wanted to spice up the decor a lil’.”
Gus said aloud, “wow, nice place you got here. Really like the fireplace next to the couch. Real homey.”
Kenny said, “yeah, it's pretty nice.”
Lizzie groaned, "oh, cool, you got yourself another talking gun? And this one's green? Wow! Who cares? No-one."
Gus said, "oh, okay. Okay, that's fine. Be rude. My name is Gus, not that it matters to you."
Derek raised an eyebrow. What had Lizzie’s panties in a twist?
Gene tried to change the topic as he said, "here we go! Look at you. You're gettin' the hang of this bounty hunter thing already! And…. Hello…. Who's your friend?"
Lizzie said as she walked closer to the window to the kitchen that sat behind the couch and finally spotted Kiara and said, "whoa, didn't see the woman with blue skin and three tits standing there 'til Gene mentioned it. Who are you?"
Kiara said, "Chimantolo, I am Kiara Hal'Soni, Krootabulan warrior priestess determined to defeat the G3 with the help of this human, Derek Parrson. You must be Gene Zaroothian and Derek's sister. I am humbled to meet you in physicality."
Gene smirked as he clearly found Kiara attractive and said, "well, didn't expect a pretty little thing like you to end up working with us…."
Lizzie asked, wanting to change the subject quickly before Gene got any further, "how'd the mission go?"
Derek said, "we killed Krubis, here's the drill as proof…. Maybe I should put these things on a shelf? Like how our grandpa would mount his hunting trophies on the wall?"
Derek put Krubis' drill next to 9-Torg’s mandible on a small table near the TV.
Gene smirked and said, "looks like I taught you well."
Lizzie said, "wow, I'm actually impressed. Yeah, I was always hoping you'd find your calling, but…. I just didn't think it would be bounty hunting…. But then again, I don't know what I thought it would be…. Maybe hair styling? And NOT good at it."
Derek rolled his eyes and groaned in sarcasm, "gee, thanks Lizzie. Your support means a lot…."
Kiara raised an eyebrow as Gene asked, "and what's wrong with bounty hunting?"
Lizzie groaned, "ugh, can you please tell this dried-up sack of shit to go home? I don't wanna share a couch with him."
Gene said, "tough titties, Leslie. Your kid and me had a deal."
Lizzie yelled, "it's Lizzie! And that's not my kid, Jesus. We're siblings."
Gene said, "sorry, I don't know how your species works yet. Sibling. Fine. Got it. Doesn't change a thing. I live here now!"
Kiara whispered to Derek, "are they always like this?"
Derek whispered back, "pretty much ever since I let Gene stay here so he could help us stop the G3 from selling my species as a drug."
Kiara whispered, "I see…."
Lizzie yelled to Derek, "come on! Can't he find his own place to stay?"
Gene said, "hey, that's not right. I'm barely takin' up any space. You know we had a deal, fair and square."
Derek said, "alright, alright, everybody calm down. Gene is staying, that's the end of it."
Lizzie groaned, "oh come on! We barely know this guy! You're really gonna side with him over your own sister?"
Gene was about to say something before Derek suddenly yelled, sick of his sister's complaining, "yes! Because he is literally the only person helping us! Gene gave me the suit. And the Bounty 5000. And the Dodge Unit. And helps me track down the G3 assholes who are trying to sell our species as drugs. And all he asks for in return is to crash on our couch watching Tammy and the T-Rex! So shut the fuck up!"
Everyone went wide-eyed at Derek's outburst towards his sister.
After a few moments, Gene said, "y-yeah, and you're one to talk about barely knowin' me! What about that Flimborg boyfriend you've been hanging around with all the time? Can't trust him!"
Derek asked, "yeah, I- say what now?"
Lizzie said, "Tweeg's harmless, and nice! You are being a spacist. And he's not my boyfriend…. Yet."
Gene said, "trust me, Flimborgs are bad news."
Kiara said, "it usually depends on the Flimborg in question, from my experience."
Lizzie looked at her brother and said, "come on, have my back here…."
Derek groaned, crossing his arms as he gave Lizzie a questioning look. He was mainly trying to process the situation. His sister was dating an alien? Now, one part of him was itching to go into overprotective brother mode, since his sister was dating some random alien boy. Hell, he didn't even think that humans would be attractive towards some aliens. But another part of him wanted to respect his sister's decisions, and he honestly wasn't one to lecture her about dating an alien. He has already befriended several aliens over the course of this journey, and he also found a particular alien woman standing next to him attractive, so….
Derek said after deliberating all of that in his head, "Gene, you're being a racist."
Gene said, "okay, ya got me there…."
Lizzie started to say, "thank you-"
Derek said, "but that doesn't mean you should shack up with an alien boy you've known for like a day, though. I mean, it's good that you're making some friends, but ya don't see me goin’ all Captain Kirk on the first hot alien I see!”
Kiara asked, “Captain Kirk?”
Lizzie jokes as she crosses her arms and looks at her brother, “some hot space captain from a TV show, known for sleeping with every alien he comes across. Usually women with green skin and big boobs. Didn't take you for an interstellar pervert….”
Derek growled under his breath as Kiara said, “ah, an apt comparison it seems. The space captain I mean. But, your brother is correct. You should get to know the Flimborg boy before you get serious.”
Lizzie groaned before she pointed at Gene and said, "fair enough, but I am just so sick of this guy!"
Gene said, "oh, you think this is easy for me? If I'm pissin' you off, at least you can leave.  But my legs don't work anymore. I'm stuck listening to your boy trouble every time I'm tryna' watch my stories."
Lizzie said, "I can't even get peace and quiet in my own home because there's an alien cripple jerking off on my couch 24/7!"
Gene said, "first of all, I do it in the bathroom. And second, that's a high estimate!"
Everyone cringed when they heard THAT.
Lizzie said, "ew! I was kidding."
Gene said, "er, yeah! Me too…. I was kiddin'.... We all know I was kiddin'...."
Knifey said, "on second thought, I don't wanna be near Gene anymore…. Not even to stab his dick off…. Not unless he washes it first…. But even then….”
Gus said, “we get it, dude. Gene’s kinda gross….”
Lizzie quickly changed the subject and asked Derek, "whose side are you on anyway?"
Derek groaned, "will both of you just stop?! Gene, you and I made a deal that you can stay here and help us stop the G3, but try to be a better house guest…. And cut down on stuff like…. That…. And Lizzie, it's rude to be like this to the only guy who's helping us track down the G3 and save our race. So I want you both to just shut the fuck up and at least TRY to get along for more than three seconds, capiche?!"
Lizzie groaned, "fine…."
Gene said, "fine…. Guess that's enough excitement for one day. Although ya might wanna check out the pawn shop to see what ya can spend your new payout, eh?"
Lizzie stormed off to her room as Kenny said, "oof, that was tense. It's times like these I'm almost relieved I don't have any family left alive…. But not really. I miss 'em a lot…."
Gus said, "yeah, me too Kenny."
Knifey added, “yeah, me too. I still remember the last things my mum said to me before she left….”
Gus asked, “really? What'd she say?”
Knifey said, “her direct quote was, ‘GET OUTTA HERE YA FUCKIN’ PSYCHOPATH! WE'RE BUSY! GO OFF WITH SOME PURPLE ASSHOLE FOR ALL WE CARE!’ And that's how I met Gene….”
Everyone in the room glanced at one another when they heard THAT. They questioned if Knifey was like the rest of his kind, or if he was just a psycho.
Derek then went into the kitchen and pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge. He drank it down as Kiara walked over to him.
She said, "while not perfectly handled, you did the best you could. There is no shame in that."
Derek said, "thanks. I just wish those two would stop bickering for once. We're on a mission to save the Human race after all…. Bickering isn't exactly helping us."
Kiara said, "I have heard tales of Gene being a great combatant. It seems he has fallen on harsh times, but he seems to be trying to get back on his feet…. Er, so to speak. Anyway, I am sure they can put aside their differences…. At some point."
Derek said, "I certainly hope so. I have enough to worry about as it is. Bounty hunting, talking weapons, hostile wildlife, my sister dating an alien, lack of sleep, having Gene living on my couch…. It's a lot."
Kiara put a hand on Derek's shoulder. He blushed lightly as she gave him a very kind look.
She said, "you do not have to face these situations alone, Derek. We are partners in this endeavor. So I will be there to help you, as you are here to help me."
Derek smiled and said, "thanks Kiara."
Kiara said, "you are most welcome."
Derek finished his water after having this conversation and then went over to Gene.
He asked, “so, Gene, any idea on what I should buy with my credits?”
Gene said, “yeah, I think I got something that would be useful. See, your sister is constantly asking when you're comin’ back when she's not hangin’ out with her boy toy. So I think maybe you should buy some communicators. That way one of us could contact you. See how your missions goin’ and everything.”
Derek said, “huh, not a bad idea. Thanks Gene.”
Gene actually smiled at the small praise Derek gave him.
Derek put his backpack down near the couch before he picked up his guns, putting Gus in one of his holsters as he held Kenny.
Kenny said, “y’know, if we find any other Gatlians, let's hope your belt can hold us all.”
Derek nodded and said, “yeah, let's hope so. Now, let's head to the shop and see what Mr. Keep's has. Then…. I'm gonna get some sleep. I feel like I've been doing nothing but running around ever since the G3 invaded Earth.”
Gus said, “yeah, probably a good idea.”
Derek walked towards the door as he turned towards Kiara and asked, “wanna come with us?”
Kiara said, “I would be delighted to. I have not been to Blim City for some time….”
Derek smiled as Kiara followed him out the door. As they walked onto the front lawn, they saw a guy taping parking tickets to the house….
Derek muttered, “ain't no way I'm paying for those…. It's a house, not a car.”
Kiara said, “meter maids…. Literally no-one in the galaxy respects them.”
Derek said, “some things are the same on all planets, it seems.”
Derek and Kiara made their way through the streets, arriving back at the Pawn shop in a matter of minutes.
They entered the store as Jorb said, “welcome back, jackass”, as he never kept his eyes off his phone.
Mr. Keep's yelled, “Jorb! Sorry, I- oh, it's you again.”
That's when he noticed Kiara and gave a pervy look.
Kiara rolled her eyes as Jorb said, “if you try to fuck her, I'm telling mom!”
Mr. Keep's growled, “why would she care? She works at a strip club, she ain't one to complain if I check out some attractive customers!”
Derek, desperate to change the topic, quickly asked, “hey, Mr. Keep's, do you have any communicators for sale?”
Mr. Keep's said, “huh? Oh, yeah! Yeah, I got some on that shelf over there. Right next to that box of dildos I stole from my ex-girlfriend…. Who she stole from her ex…. Who stole them from-”
Derek held up his hand and said, “I get it, I get it….”
Derek went over to the shelf as Kiara started looking around the store. Derek looked at a set of communicators. They looked like small hockey pucks with an antenna on the side, small speakers on the sides, and a button smack dab in the center.
Derek muttered as he picked the communicators up after putting Kenny in his holster, “hmm…. Looks compatible with my suit….”
He went over to the counter and said, “I'd like these communicators, please.”
Mr. Keep's looked down at them and said, “oh yeah, these things were designed for those types of bounty hunter suits. Ya plug the puck into the side of your helmet while someone calls you with the other.”
Derek said with an impressed look, “well, that'll really come in handy. How much?”
Mr. Keep's said, “one hundred, and not a penny less, bucko.”
Derek placed 100 credits, (chump change after fighting Krubis), on the counter and said, “alright, there ya go.”
Mr. Keep's quickly snatched the credits, pushed the communicators into Derek's arms and said, “thank you, have a nice life.”
Kiara then approached with an ornate looking metal spear, the blade on top as sharp as a sword.
Kiara said, “I would like to purchase this item. How much do you request for it?”
Mr. Keep's replied with a cheeky smirk, “seventy five, sweet cheeks. Discount if you flash me the goods….”
Kiara calmly replied, “seventy five and I won't punch you in your very small dick.”
Mr. Keep's went pale and said, “alright, alright, fine….”
Kiara handed Mr. Keep's 75 credits from a pouch on her belt.
Mr. Keep's said blandly, “bye, have a nice life.”
Kiara smirked as she holstered the spear on her back and made her way out of the store with Derek right behind her.
Gus said, “a’ight, that was tight, girl! You know how to shut down bozos like that.”
Derek said in agreement, “yeah, that was awesome!”
Kiara chuckled and said, “your compliments are very much appreciated. I have heard comments like that many times. If a man wants to mate with me, he must earn my respect.”
Derek blushed a little as he muttered, “I'll keep that in mind.”
He then looked down at the communicators he had purchased from the shop. Experimentally, he held one up to the side of his helmet. With a sudden spark, it snapped onto the helmet like a magnet, fusing with the tech on the sides, the antenna adjusting a few times.
Derek said curiously, “hmm…. Hey, Kiara? Wanna help me test out these communicators?”
Kiara said, “certainly. What shall I do?”
Derek handed her the other communicator and said, “I wanna see if this thing works before I give it to Gene and Lizzie so they can stay in contact with me.”
Kiara said, “a good idea. How shall we do that?”
Derek said, “maybe try speaking into it from a distance? Like say-”
Kiara suddenly vanished in a flash of purple light and reappeared on the top of another building.
She held up the communicator to her mouth and spoke into it, “can you hear me?”
Derek heard her voice as if she were right next to him, the sound coming from the communicator that had integrated with his helmet.
He said, “loud and clear Kiara. Nice work.”
Kiara chuckled before she teleported back next to Derek and said, “let us return to your home. We should rest after such an intense day.”
Derek nodded and said, “good idea. I could really use some rest after everything I've been through up until now. Let's head back to the house.”
Kiara nodded as the duo made their way back to the house….
….
A short time later….
Derek, Kiara and the talking weapons had returned to the house. Gene was still watching TV on the couch. Lizzie was presumably still in her room.
Derek put the other communicator on the table and said, “hey, Gene. We got these communicators from Mr. Keep's. You and Lizzie will be able to keep in contact while I'm on missions.”
Gene said, “nice job, kid. These’ll really come in handy. Now, why don't you get some rest before your next big bounty?”
Derek nodded, feeling pretty tired as he said to Kiara, “I'm gonna go rest in my room. There's a guest room across from mine, if you'd like to rest in there.”
Kiara nodded and said, “thank you very much, Derek. I shall take you up on your offer.”
Derek gave a small smile as he led Kiara to the stairs and to the guest room.
Derek went to his own before he said, “sleep well, Kiara.”
Kiara said, “the same goes for you, Derek.”
The two smiled at each other before entering their respective rooms and closing the doors.
Derek put Kenny, Gus and Knifey down on his desk.