Haunted

h e a r t b e a t

✫ ༒ Joey ༒ ✫

"I love listening to your heartbeat," Gabriella whispered, her head on my chest.

I was getting used to her physical affection. We were lying on her bed in candle light—something we'd been doing on a regular. We'd been having a lot of sleepovers, and then I'd sneak off the balcony early in the morning.

"It's a good heartbeat," She continued, "No signs of arrhythmias."

"And that's good?"

"Yeah, did you know ventricular fibrillation is the most fatal type?" She drew gentle circles on my chest.

"I did not," I smiled to myself.

I loved her random facts. She always thought they were embarrassing but it was kind of endearing.

"Joey?" She hummed.

I looked down at her and my heart swelled in my chest. Her brown hair was fanned out around her and her eyes were closed. I could tell she was close to falling asleep by the tone of her voice.

She was already in her pyjamas and fresh faced from doing her 'skin care routine' as she calls it. I was shirtless and I could feel the warmth of her cheek against my chest.

"Yeah?" I asked, lightly rubbing up and down her arm.

"I-" She swallowed hard, "I'm really happy we met."

"Yeah, me too."

I was extremely happy to have Gabby. When I'd first seen her in the hall that day I was blown away. She was fucking beautiful.

And she just happened to have a heart of gold.

A heart I didn't deserve.

"I'm going to fall asleep, Joe," She hummed, her breathing softening.

"I know, Gabs," I smiled, "That's fine with me."

This girl was changing my perspective on everything. She made me soft which scared me but also brought me a sense of relief.

Because here was this girl, cuddled up on my chest, not even the slightest bit scared of me. She trusted me.

I was still using and was doing a pretty good job of hiding that fact. Gabriella hadn't noticed—or if she had she hadn't said anything about it.

I was falling deep into the hole. I wasn't sure how I was going to get or if I even would. I couldn't take my father's abuse anymore. It was fucking exhausting.

I was the one holding together my siblings, I put food on the table, I kept them safe. Me. A nearly eighteen year old, taking care of four children.

It was a fucking mess but I had no way out. I was chained to that house as long as those kids were inside.

But being with Gabriella was like finally fucking breathing. She was an angel—my angel—and I swear to god she was constantly trying to save me.

I was just scared of letting her.

"My mam wants to meet you," She whispered, "I told her you're busy."

"Okay," I replied, trying not to sound panicked, "I am busy."

I wasn't scared of meeting her mam. I was scared of what her mam would say to her about me.

I wasn't exactly the type of lad a mam would want dating their daughter.

"Good night, Joe," She sighed, throwing one of her legs over mine.

"Good night, Angel," I pressed a kiss to her temple and watched a smile pull at her lips.

I let her drift off to sleep and I did the same.

Because I was safe here with her, and she was safe with me.

And I did my best to not let my mind wander to my kids back the house.

Let them be safe.