The Strength of a High and Noble Hill (An Outlander Story)

Chapter 55: We Have Always Had Each Other

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has voted on chapters, commented and added this story to their reading lists.

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Ellen watches her brother closely, counting each breath he takes; she's terrified that the next one she counts will be his last. She sits by her brother's bedside in his tent. Due to his precarious state, they'd been tending to him for the better part of the night. Mama, Da and Roger have all been in the tent, fretting around Brian.

The Sherstons have already offered their home for Brian to recuperate further. The letter hadn't mentioned Brian's accidental hanging. It would be uncouth to discuss so openly, even in a letter but the snide part of Ellen knows that sensationalism of the story has no doubt made the rounds of Hillsborough society and it's too big for Mrs Sherston to offer her invitation out of kindness. The notoriety of having the hanged man as a house guest would focus the attention of Hillsborough on the Sherstons in a most gratifying way.

The whole situation is precarious as even though Brian lives (Ellen crosses her pointer and middle fingers as the thought crosses her mind), she's now reminded of how easily you can lose the ones you love. The thought causes her mind to swerve back to Murtagh. Earlier that day, Ellen had watched as Da and Roger, who's been recovering from his own injuries (thankfully only has a few bruises and sore limbs), load Murtagh's covered body into a wagon to be taken with them. She saw Da linger by the wagon for ten minutes, Roger placing a hand on his shoulder in comfort, before straightening his shoulders and returning to work.

Ellen turns back to Brian, her hands reaching out to touch him but they hesitate, hovering in the air as she tries to decide where best to put them. His state still seems so precarious touching him might hurt him even more.

There doesn't seem to be one bit of him that hasn't been touched. His hands are swollen, stained purple-red with bruising, the crushed fingers nearly black, raw rope-weals sunk so deep in the flesh of his wrists that she is queasily sure she can see white bone. Two fingers of Brian's right hand are broken; all his nails are clawed bloody, torn, or missing. Her own throat tightens at this evidence of just how ferociously he had fought to live. She'd almost lost him, her best friend.

The grotesqueness of his hands doesn't match the horror of his face. It is bruised and swollen, too, with a ghastly ruff of leeches attached beneath his jaw, but it is more subtly deformed, like some sinister stranger pretending to be her brother. His hands are decorated with leeches, too. It is almost like he is wearing every leech available.

It all looks unreal, badly done makeup for a horror play.

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A little while later, Jamie slides into Brian's tent (trying not to think about the position he'd found his son in with Brynmor Jones in the same tent) where Claire is currently sitting with Ellen while Brian sleeps. Roger has been tasked with organising food for the men and making small medical checkups on Claire's behalf. Ellen is combing out Brian's tumbled hair with a wooden comb, gently removing burs and twigs, working at the tangles, slowly and patiently. Claire strokes his cheek, singing something under her breath—"Frère Jacques."

Jamie stays close to the entrance of the tent, only looking over at them briefly before standing awkwardly by the door. His mind still swirling from all the conflicting emotions he has been experiencing what with his godfather's death and the devastation that came with it then the horror then relief at his son's hanging then survival. He's almost afraid to grasp onto that relief as he knows how quickly it can almost disappear.

Claire looks up and catches Jamie's eye. She gives him a nod and a tiny smile, meant to be reassuring, but he can see the bleakness in her eyes. Claire gives Ellen's arm a small squeeze and then gets up to go over to Jamie, laying her hand gently on his arm.