DIVERGENT: Tobias (Watty Award Winner 2013)

Chapter 24

Chapter 24

I wake up the next morning. For the first time in a while, I feel rested, refreshed. I don't know why, though. Maybe because I finally told someone about the war plans? Or maybe because I finally connect with someone? But that doesn't seem like the right reason.

No. It must be something else. I sit up in my bed and think for a while, my eyes lingering around my room searching for something that might trigger an explanation. 

My eyes land on the words "Fear God Alone" painted on my wall. I stare at them long and hard, my eyes focused intensely. And then it clicks! I know what today is. Today is initiation day. Today is the day that decides where my life will go. Will I stay here in the Dauntless compound with Tris? Or will I end up roaming around the factionless with Tris? The only thing I can be sure about is Tris. I am with her whatever the circumstances. If she leaves, I leave. 

I look over at the clock beside me. Nine forty-six. Well It's pretty early considering the fact that I don't need to be at the simulation room until one. But I decide against crawling back under my covers. I get up and head to the bathroom, ready to take a long, cold shower. That should wake me up! 

And, sadly, I really do need to be awake for everyone's fear landscape. I splash the cold water onto my face in an attempt to wake up a little. The water rolls down my back and the feeling is extremely relaxing. I didn't realize I'd been so desperate for a long shower. I must be working too hard.

It's probably just been my anxiety lately. Not to mention my nerves. It's just Tris. She evokes these new emotions out of me and I have no idea how to handle them!

I sigh remembering that I can't spend all day in the shower and turn off the water before getting out. I dry myself off, quickly pulling on my usual black pants and T-shirt. I run a hand through my hair and glance in the mirror once, declaring myself to look decent. 

On the way over to the simulation room, I stop by the dining hall and grab a hamburger to go. While eating, I start to get excited. Sure I'll have to endure watching a lot of simulations, but I also get to see Tris's. Or rather, I'll get to see her reactions to them.

I stuff the rest of the hamburger in my mouth when I reach the simulation room, hoping that I'll find Tris sitting in one of the chairs, waiting her turn to enter her fear landscape. Sadly, I only see a couple of the Dauntless leaders who got here early, like I did.

There are seats available next to them, but I don't feel like making small talk. Heck, I don't even feel like being here! But I really didn't have to wait much longer, seeing as how everyone started showing up in the next fifteen minutes...well, close to everyone. And of course Tris is the one to be late.

All the dauntless-born go through the simulation first and, since I only trained them half the time, I don't have to  pay that much attention to them. I get away with just sneaking a glance at them every couple of minutes. Nothing really changes though.

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I see Christina leave the room, most likely to go find Tris. Hell, It's about time! And it's not like I can leave to go find her. She really did need to go find her since only Marlene needed to go through the simulation before it's time for the transfer initiates. 

The minutes pass slowly as I wait for Tris to enter the room. One minute. Two minutes. My hands start shaking and I end up cracking my knuckles, one by one, just for something to do. Three minutes. Four minutes. Five minutes. Six minutes. I end up shifting my weight from one foot to another, becoming impatient. Where is she? Seven minutes. 

And then finally I see her push past the crowd and come into view. I breathe out a quick sigh of relief before returning my attention to the screens. I can't let anyone become suspicious. She walks past me, not a moment later, completely ignoring me the way I'm ignoring her. I feel my face lift into a small smile at the strangeness of our relationship, but I compose my face before anyone notices.