Hawk's Eye

Chapter 21

She went home and changed before she went to the gym for practice. She passed by the gymnastics wing and sighed longingly at the girls practicing in their colorful leos. She practiced her routines for cheer before she went to dance.

"This week, Kyndall, Jazzy, and Monica are going to have a solo for competition. Monica, you're going to do a jazz piece called Tap the Night Away. Jazzy, you're doing an acrobatic piece called Circus. Kyndall, you're doing lyrical and it's called You Bring Tears," Donna said. Kyndall sighed and nodded. She wondered how parallel the song would be to her life. They got to work right away. Donna came over to Kyndall and played the music for her. Sighing, Kyndall held her stomach lightly. She felt like she was going to throw up; the song was so depressing. Donna looked at her curiously.

"Are you okay Kyndall?" she asked. Kyndall nodded and dropped her arms.

"Yes; let's just start," Kyndall said softly. Donna hesitantly nodded and started showing her the counts. After dance, she went directly home. She showered before she filled her bathtub with ice and got in. It stung and hurt, but her body was aching. After her body was completely numb, she dried off and went to bed.

Ryder sat awake all night thinking about Kyndall. He couldn't get her out of his mind. He couldn't get her son out of his mind. She said she was raped. She said Declan took her innocence and that she hadn't done anything since. He scrunched his brows in realization and shot up. He realized that Carter was Declan's son. What else could she have hung over Declan's head to make him squirm? And it would make perfect sense for her to give the baby away. She wouldn't want the memory of something that hurt her and was still so fresh in her mind. He sighed and plopped back down. He felt like an idiot.

The next day, Ryder stood by the gates of the courtyard for Kyndall. She only walked past him; she didn't want to get into it right now. Ryder sighed and followed her. She looked at him before she continued walking to her locker. She put her books up and got her things for her first class.

"Dolly, I'm sorry," Ryder pleaded. She shut her locker and looked at him.

"It's fine, not everyone means what they say when they're trying to get into someone's pants," she replied coolly before she walked away. Ryder sighed and ran a hand down his face. Kyndall hurried off to her first period. Mallory tapped her lightly.

"Are you... better today?" Mallory asked. Kyndall nodded and shrugged.

"I'm fine, but I am leaving earlier today," she said smiling lightly. Mallory looked at her confused.

"Why would you do that?" she asked.

"I'm going to the stables. Let's just say I made a new friend," she smiled. Mallory looked at her curiously and worried. Kyndall sighed and leaned in closer. "I just want a relationship that's not being dictated by my past. I want a fresh start."

"He is always going to be a part of you. You can't just pretend that he isn't there. No matter what you do, he'll always be right there. And when he gets older, he's going to want to know who you are; and he's going to show up. What will you do then? Pretend he's not there?" Mallory asked quietly. Kyndall froze and looked at her.

"That's unfair Mal and you know it. You of all people should know that I don't deserve this," Kyndall whispered. Her eyes watered at Mallory's words. Even though she knew Mallory was right, it still hurt her. She took a deep breath and looked away from Mallory for a second.

"You're right; you don't deserve this, but he does deserve you," Mallory said quietly. Kyndall ran her fingers through her hair before she faced forward again. Kyndall paid as much attention as she could before it finally ended. She went to all of her classes except the last one. She snuck off to the stables and ended up hanging out with Tony again. She ran off to the stables for two weeks. She just felt more comfortable there; like nothing else mattered. She had come tto just accept that Ryder wasn't coming around. He couldn't handle the truth, and Kyndall decided to start trying to move on.