Gary and Libby - Take One

Chapter Forty Six

  "Libby!" Garys at my side in seconds, his voice urgent. "Libby! What is it?! Whats wrong?!" He wraps an arm around my waist, his other hand shaking my arm urgently. "Libby talk to me!"
"Gary! It hurts!" I wail, i cant even see clearly, let alone speak.
"What hurts Libby?! Tell me what hurts!" His eyes try to find mine, but i cant see anything through the tears. Another surge of pain its me, causing me to double over onto Garys knee.
"Libby! Talk to me. What is it?!" He wraps his arm across my back, trying to pull me up, but it hurts to much to talk. All i can do is wail.
"Shit!" I hear the panic rise in Garys voice. "Is it the baby? Libby, is it the baby?!"
All i can do is wail, wail and nod my head frantically, or i think thats what im doing anyway, im not sure. The rooms spinning and i cant hear anything either. I feel my face against something cool, but now its black, and theres silence. Deafening silence.

                                                                              ***

I open my eyes slowly, they sting. From all the tears I presume. Wait. Where am i? It's white, everything's white. Hospital. I go to rub my eye but I can't move my hand, I look down. Gary. His forehead is rested on my thigh, his hand gripping mine tightly. Carefully I wriggle my hand free, I think he might be asleep. Gently I run my fingers through the short hairs at the back of his neck.
"Lib." Gary breathes, lifting his head slowly so his gaze meets mine.
"Hey you." I whisper, flashing him the smallest smile. "Why am I he- Oh god!" My heart is in my throat, the tears immediately burning my eyes as I remember exactly why I'm here. Gary recognises my panic and grips my hand.
"No, No Lib! You're okay! You're both okay!"
I visibly relax as I try to regain composure. I dont say anything, I can't, so I just nod slowly instead.
"Libby I'm sorry." Gary whispers, drawing my hand up to his lips. "I'm so so sorry Baby, please forgive me. I didn't know, I mean, I didnt mean- I-I-"
"Ssshh." I whisper, pressing my finger against his lips. "It's okay." Neither of us say anything for a while so i decide to take my chance to speak.

"I need you to trust me Gary. I need you to believe me when I say nothing happened." I watch as Gary swallows hard, his gaze drifting down to the bed. "Gary?"
"But that's not the truth is it Lib? I saw you. When I came in. That wasn't nothing Lib. I'm not stupid. And then you just walked out and-" he looks like he's about to cry.
"Gary listen to me. I didn't want anything to happen. I need you to believe me. I didn't want it." There was no point trying to argue with him, he knew I wasnt telling the truth. His gaze burns into mine.
"What do you mean?"
"What you saw." I swallow hard. "I didn't want him to do it, I tried to stop him but he's was too strong Gary and I-"
"What did he do?!" Gary cut in, standing up suddenly. "What did the bastard do to you Libby?! I'll kill him! I'll fucking kill him Libby! Where is he?!" He goes to pull out his phone, but I grasp hold of his wrist.
"No, n-n-no Gary. Sssh, come here, sit down. Calm down." I tug at his arm, so hes sat back down beside me.
"Libby did he hurt you?" his voice is bearly above a whisper.
"Can we talk about this later Gary," I stroke the side of his face gently. "Im tired."
"Ye. Sure. Sorry." He drops his head again.
"And you promise you won't leave me? I need you here Gary." I whisper, nestling back into the pillow.
"I promise Baby. I'm here." Gary locks his fingers into mine, and pulls them up to his lips for another kiss.

                                                                           ***

Six hours later I'm back home, snuggled on the sofa with a hot chocolate and Gary. However, neither of us have said much. I knead my toes into Gary's thigh and he gives me a weary smile, stroking my ankles.
"I'm so sorry Libby." He murmurs, looking me directly in the eye.
"It wasn't your fault." I hold his hand in mine, stroking his fingers, I shift a little closer.
"But it was though." He sighs, wrapping his arm round my neck and pulling he into a hug. "Part of it was....most of it was."
"Gary." I mutter into his neck. I don't want to think about any of it.
"Lib hear me out." He drags his fingers though my hair. "It stops now, all this stupid stuff, all this fucking stupid stuff I've been doing-the stuff I've been saying. It stops now, because I cant loose you. I can't do that Libby, I cant loose either of you."
I pull away from the hug and look Gary in the eye. I don't like it. I don't like serious, upset Gary. I want my Gary back, i want funny sexy Gary.
"Are you going to leave Libby?" he breathes, when i don't say anything.
Slowly I sake my head, my fingers toying with his stubbed cheek. Gently, I bring my lips down onto his, kissing him tenderly.
His one hand reaches my hair whilst the other curves round my back. I run my hands down his chest, reaching the waistband of his jeans.
"Not here." Gary whispers, standing up slowly, "Wrap your legs around me."
I do as I'm told and Gary carried me up to the bedroom.

Gary drops me down onto the bed, climbing up my body after me. He kisses along my jaw bone, up across my neck and onto my cheek. His hands slide under my t-shirt and grip my hips gently, holding me in place.
I feel sick.
"Gary wait." What are you doing?! Gary lifts his head gently and smiles at me.
"Whats up?"
"I-" I take a deep breath, im not really sure what im doing. "I cant do this."
Gary climbs off me in a millisecond and kneels on the bed. "What do you mean?"
"This." I shake my head. "This, i cant do this. I feel tears burning the backs of my eyes. What the fuck is going on?!
"Okay." Gary nods slowly. "Thats okay, i understand. Lets get some sleep then yea?" I slides off the bed and goes to pull back the covers.
"No Gary." I cut in. "Not this. I mean, the whole thing. Like, today with Mark- and now you dont trust me- and i thought id lost our baby and-" Im fully aware that im not making any sense. But the truth is, im not really sure what im trying to say.
"Baby, what are you talking about?" Garys eyes are wide as he stares at me.
"I dont think i can do this." I breathe. I watch as Gary swallows hard, rubbing his cheek with his hand. He closes his eyes for a moment and then when he opens them i think hes going to cry.
"Are you leaving me Libby?" He chokes, its barley audible. I can feel the tears burning my eyes, threatening to fall. What the hell am i doing?
"I think we need to take a break Gary."

WHAT? LIBBY? WHAT?