Invader Zim - Lost Chronicles of Doom! - Continuous Novel

Chapter Seventeen - Tick, Tock

"Invader Tak, due to your miserable fail at Testing Day, we hereby demote you to janitorial duties. You may continue your Invader training in seventy years," the red-eyed Tallest announced, grimacing. "Yes, and you'll be sent to planet Dirt to make sure you work extra hard!" Purple announced stupidly. Tak fell to her knees. "Please, my Tallest, give me another chance! It wasn't my fault the systems shut down because of some idiot named Zim!" she pleaded. "Enough, send her away," Red ordered, waving her off. Guards came and took her by the arms, dragging her backwards into her Voot cruiser. "NOOOOO!!!" she screamed as it was set to lock mode and it flew to Dirt. She walked out of there with her mop and looked around.

Dirt. There was dirt everywhere.

"Curse you, Zim! CURSE YOU!!" Janitor Tak exclaimed, breaking the mop with hatred. Her SIR Unit, Mimi, began to help clean with her, which only made it worse since there was lava under the dirt. "Mimi!" she nagged, pulling her away from the lava. It splattered upward and landed on her robot's hand, burning it off. "Ma'am, damage can lead to malfunctions," she announced as more lava came up. Tak pulled on her antennae in stress. "Come on, Mimi, time to leave this wretched place," Tak said, grabbing her sidekick and leaping onto her ship. "Computer, start overdrive auto repairs!"

Soon the ship was ready to fly away. She could go back, she could stay on the other side of the planet to avoid the lava. There were ways out so that she wouldn't betray her country. No, she thought boldly, I get revenge first. Then I get honor. She flew away on her ship without turning back.

Her past was slowly inching away.

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Zim gasped for breath as he woke up from a dream. No, not a dream, he told himself, wrapping his fingere around his arms, It was a nightmare. He was facing his past, the very thing he was running from his entire life ever since he was banished to Food Courtia. He stood up and kept walking though the Earth's disgusting star was hardly visible. Where he was walking, he didn't know. Anywhere. The Irken was just glad to be away from the Dib-monkey, actually. Something clicked together in his brain meats like a beginner archer finally hitting a target. "The Gargantis Array! I forgot all about it!" Zim exclaimed, hitting his forehead with his hand.

He was suddenly sprayed with thick, brown mud and he screeched. "IT BURNS!!!!" he yelled. The mud dripped off after a while as his skin steamed uncomfortably. "Stupid human!" Zim called after the car, shaking a fist in the air. Was that an omen? Was the Gargantis Array bad news? Of course not--what was he thinking? He was beginning to sound like the Dib, with all those crazy theories. The invader turned in the direction of where he could get a space ship. He turned to the NASA building.

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"What'd'ya mean there's a meteor heading this way? Our scanners say it's perfectly safe," a chubby astronomer said to Zim, getting a mug full of coffee. "You have to listen to me!" he pleaded, "My...parents...have highly sensitive scanners that go all the way to your nearest star system, Alpha Centauri. If anyone would know, it's me...er, us." The man took his mug and put it to his mouth, tipping it without sipping. The black coffee spilled all over his white, buttoned shirt. Zim's eye twitched in disgust as he thought how filthy and unsanitary that was. All the more reason to destroy them, he thought, wishing he could say it out loud.

"Alright, fine, green kid. But someone has to go in a space ship and destroy it immediately."

Zim's squeegly spooch fluttered with hope. He was hoping the humans would maintain their usual stupidity and say that very thing. "I'll do it! Zim shall step up and save you horrible humans from the meteor!" he announced boldly. Tears formed in all of the NASA humans' eyes as they took off their hats in respect. "May everything from coffee beans to caffeine be with you, son, may they be with you..." the fat man whispered.

"Yes, yes, now the space ship?" Zim asked impatiently. "Oooooh-whee! We got ourselves a daredevil!" someone called from behind the mass of computers and screens. "That, or somebody has a death wish!" another joked. They both erupted into laughter as the Irken clenched his fists in anger. "Right this way," Fat instructed, leading him down a hall.

"This..." announced Fat, extending a hand to the ship, "Is Mothermonkey, the ship you'll ride. Now do me a favor and have a farewell coffee!" He handed him a mug and Zim took it, puzzled. "It's a little warm. What's in it?" he asked. "Caffeine. Coffee," the man replied, spilling his coffee-filled mug on his shoes. "Yeesh," Zim said under his breath, setting the coffee on a butler's head. "Hey!" the butler exclaimed. They ignored him and kept walking.

"So any last wishes, son?" Fat asked, tears again filling his eyes. "Yes, yes. I...would like to destroy all humans," he replied. "Count it as done! Wait, what?" the NASA worker asked. Fat laughed, his pot belly jiggling up and down. "We'll get you one human to destroy, little greenie. Let's get...um...Joe!" Zim grimaced as he realized these humans don't know who Dib was and wouldn't offer him as the sacrifice.

"Let's just move on..." Zim sighed, shaking his head. Fat grunted and shrugged as he headed into the rocket chamber. The Irken's red eyes, covered by lenses, widened as he saw how big the ship was. There must've been at least three different parts attached, while Irken ships only had one part: the ship itself. "Well, here's your suit." The man handed him a thick, white space suit with a dark glass covering the head. It was at least five sizes too big for the short alien. "No, thanks, human..." he said, pushing it away. He pressed a button on his Pak and a bubble formed around his head, and then it disappeared. "A death wish for sure!" Fat said under his breath. He left the room as he rubbed his head.

"Now, humans, I may have lost my...Zimness...but Zim is back now! No distractions from my mission!" he said. "Since the Vortian is unreachable, I'll just have to go to Moo-Ping 10. No one shall say Zim never tried!" He leaped onto the rocket and looked at all the primitive controls. These rocket ships are for smeets! They were Irken play things! My incredible race abandoned this model centuries ago, he thought bitterly, flipping a switch. The countdown started. Ten...nine...eight... Maybe this was a bad idea. What if the human ship breaks down? There would be no Gir there to take the Voot cruiser and catch him before his carbon monoxide air would run out. Seven...six...five...

He had to do this, for his country. Four...three... He could do this; the rocket was amazingly stable... ...Right? Two...One... "WAAAAIT!!" Blast off.