find me

41. redhead

"So is Jenny coming on Sunday?"

Bucky seemed absentminded as he stared at the road in front of him, driving his best friend's pick up. Steve glanced at him a few times before clearing his throat.

"Earth to Bucky?"

His head snapped to the side and seemed to realise only in that moment that Steve had asked him something.

"Sorry. What did you say?"

Steve let out a big sigh, the frown between his brows digging a bit deeper. He had been worried, and this type of behaviour was exactly one of the reasons why.

"I said, are you bringing Jenny with ya on Sunday?"

Bucky hummed slowly, a grimace slightly contorting his face. "Not sure."

Steve's eyes narrowed at him. "What did you do?"

Bucky scoffed and tried a humourless laugh as they left the city and entered the highway.

"Why do you think it was me who did something?" The words tasted bitter on his tongue, but he knew that was only because of the guilt, and the fact that Steve was right, he had done something. He had left another girl without explanation, caused possibly another heartbreak, maybe made her think less of herself because of it, or at least made her wonder why she ever thought that being with Bucky was a good idea.

"Wasn't it?" Steve simply retorted.

Bucky's stare slowly sunk into his thoughts, mirroring the darkness in them, and the hint of lightheartedness that a second ago was lingering onto his words disappeared completely, leaving only a bleak emptiness.

"It just didn't work out." Bucky mumbled quietly, internally getting frustrated at his friend's condescending tone, but externally looking completely numb. He didn't like taking shit from Steve for multiple reasons, but one of them was the fact that he was supposed to be the young one. Bucky was supposed to take care of him, not the other way around. One of the other reasons was that he wasn't just younger, he had a very different life experience than Bucky. He had always been wise, since they were kids, but he was still a punk. He didn't understand, he couldn't.

"This has to stop, Buck." Steve replied in a frighteningly serious tone.

"And what is this exactly?" Bucky's words came out quiet but seething.

"This is you not coming back with me to Brooklyn last month when we had leave. This is you going out with a different girl every week, picking them up at random bars to then ditch them for no fucking reason. It's been going on for months. Don't you think maybe you should give it a rest?" Steve wasn't one for pushing, especially with Bucky, but he had seriously drove him to the limit. He had always been a bit reserved and shy, but never shut his best friend out like this. For the past few months they had barely talked, and whenever they did, Bucky didn't seem to be even in the room. He felt like a shadow of himself. 

And sure, he had always been successful with girls, got a lot of attention, but it never seemed to interest him that much. He focused on school, training to join the Army, and when they both got in he focused on work. He barely had any girlfriends and now he took a different one out every five to seven days. Always leaving them for no apparent reason, not really liking any of them either.