Complexity

Like Xinyu?

The festival is coming. I can already see the student council running around everywhere like their life depends on it, shoving props, papers, wires—all the chaos that always comes with this kind of event. Every year, when this day arrives, I usually lock myself in my room or bury myself in work like it's a second life. Not because I hate festivals. But because I'm always stuck between the zone I should be in—where I function—and the zone I want to be in—but will never feel safe in.

But this year... it's different.

This year, I have friends.

Well, technically they've always wanted to be my friends from the start, but because of my trauma, they respected my space. They never crossed the line. Never reached too far. Never broke the boundary. Except for one person.

Xinyu.

The one who dragged me into this mess.
The one who surprised me when I didn't even realize I needed one.
The one whose thoughts run faster than I can ever understand.

Because I chose to join the festival this year, I'm spending most of my time around the Peer Tutor Club. It's not tiring. Not even that many people come to us. Mostly it's just the younger students using our room to rest, thanks to Joobin's idea of turning it into a "rest stop." She's clever like that.

Speaking of rest, I noticed Xinyu has been running around with the student council all day. I remember Seoyeon mentioned something about a dance performance, and at first, I thought it would be some competition or audition. But it turns out it's just the Dance Club's show—and the Random Play Dance section at the end. I only remembered that when I noticed the big crowd in the hall and that Xinyu had been missing from her seat since this morning.

I didn't think much of it at first. Xinyu had volunteered to help the council from the beginning. That's just how she is. But still... I know she's in the Dance Club. It's strange, right? She's new. Usually, only seniors get picked for performances. Then again, she does love watching dance. I figured I'd invite her to watch the Random Play Dance part.

But no matter how many times I called her, she didn't pick up.

"Where are you?" I muttered, dragging Nien with me. The hall was swarming with students, but thanks to Nakyung, we got access to the second-floor viewing room—usually reserved for teachers or special guests. It was like an art theater, and I could see everything from up here.

Nien wanted to join the dance, so she and Nakyung went down to the floor.

"You're not coming?"

"No way," I said, waving my hand.

"I just want to watch from here."

"Alright. If anyone asks, say Nakyung allowed it."

I nodded and stayed.

From here, I could see everything—the chaos, the laughter, the energy. I even spotted Nien and Nakyung dancing below, their faces lit up with joy.

"I've never seen Nakyung that happy," I whispered.

"Xinyu would be smiling if she saw this."

Just as I reached for my phone to try calling her again, it buzzed.

Xinyu.

"Sohyun!!!"
Her voice was loud and the background was even louder—music, students shouting. Where was she?

"Xinyu? Why is it so noisy? Where are you?"

"Look from above, okay??"
What? What does that mean—look from above?
Before I could ask, she hung up.

Then the song in the hall changed.

I turned back toward the stage, and that's when I saw her.

Zhou Xinyu.

"ZHOU XINYU?!" I practically yelled.

There she was, alone on the stage.

Wearing a black tank top and jeans—her long hair left untied and swaying with every step she took.

Elegant. Effortless. Mesmerizing.

She moved like she had known the choreography forever. Like the spotlight was made for her. Her entire presence pulled my eyes in like gravity.

"What is she doing..." I whispered, but my face burned hot. My heart felt like it could explode.

Then, just before her short 30-second solo ended... she looked straight at me and winked.

I froze.

My entire brain just—crashed.

And the worst part?

I loved it.

"W-what the hell..." I muttered, still staring.

Then—

"So?"
Her voice came from behind me.

I jumped.
"YOU—what? How are you up here already?!"

She grinned, proud and glowing. 

"You were too focused to notice."

I really was.

"So? How did I look?" she asked again.

I could barely meet her eyes. My heartbeat betrayed me.

I wanted to kiss her.
So badly.

I stepped closer, placing my hands on her shoulders—bare and warm under my palms. I leaned in slowly, eyes drifting to her lips. Her face turned bright red, but she didn't pull away. Her right hand slid around my waist.

I was so close.
Too close.
I couldn't do it.

Not here. Not at school. Not when I wasn't sure if this would ruin what we had.

So instead—I pinched her nose.

"OW! PARK SOHYUN!!"

I kept pinching her.

"Who told you to wear clothes like that, huh?! What was with that dance?!"

"But you liked it, right?" she teased, her voice all honey and smugness.

My face went red again, and I let go, turning away.

"W-well... your performance was decent."

"Your ears are red."

"SHUT UP!"

She just laughed.

"Are you hungry?" she asked gently.

I nodded, and she took my hand. Warm. Firm. Safe.

"Let's eat at Yubin's booth," she smiled.

Again, I nodded. I didn't care where. I just wanted to stay like this—with her hand in mine.

"But in your last song..." I asked softly. 

"Why did you make that expression?"

"Oh, that?" she chuckled. 

"I did that on purpose. Thought it'd look cool."

"It was cool. Really cool."

Her smile turned into the widest grin I've ever seen. She squeezed my hand tighter, her eyes shining.

And that was the moment I realized—

She keeps pulling me closer, without even trying.

And I don't want to pull away anymore.