JiHan | one-shot ( book II )

Toy

Top : Jeonghan

Type : Angst, happy ending

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[ You disappear, then come back to me.
Did you really think I was a toy and that you could play with me like that ?
I'm still a human being like you, so think about how I feel.
Please stop acting like this, this situation is really the worst.

At first I saw it as a game, you're ignoring me, I don't like it and I'm making you understand.
You apologize, come back to me, I don't care.
We start again, talking, teasing, playing like two children.
Then again nothing, you stop interacting with me again.

Can you stop this? I'm not a toy, let alone yours.
You can't pick me up and throw me around like that.
I have feelings and emotions and I'd like you to respect them.
Please, stop making me believe in something when all you want to do is play with me.

You disappear, then come back to me.
Did you really think I was a toy and that you could play with me like that?
I'm still a human being like you, so think about how I feel.
Please stop acting like this, this situation is really the worst.

Seconds? That's normal.
Minutes? Probably.
Hours? It's bearable.
Days? Strange.

I see you being active on the networks, posting notes, storys and ghosting me.
What's that supposed to mean in practical terms?
Have you found something better than me? I know I'm not surprised.
Still, it doesn't give you permission to do this, again because of you, my heart slowly breaks.

You disappear, then come back to me.
Did you really think I was a toy and that you could play with me like that?
I'm still a human being like you, so think about how I feel.
Please stop acting like this, this situation is really the worst].

Jeonghan finds this on the main table of his apartment, he's looking for his boyfriend but he's not there, which is strange because he's always there, only this little piece of paper with what seems to be music lyrics is there, the blond frowns he never thought Joshua would feel like this, he didn't feel he was neglecting him so much, putting him aside so much, but maybe he is, maybe he's spending more time with his friends, maybe he's going out more than he used to, maybe he's not interested in Joshua like he used to be, maybe he's changed.

He hadn't realized it until now, but then maybe it really was the case, after all, hurting his boyfriend wasn't his goal at all. He had no desire to break him into a million pieces. Jeonghan sighed and then decided to send Joshua a message.

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Jeonghan

Shuji ! I found your song and I'm really sorry for hurting you. I honestly didn't even realize I was putting you on the back burner, I'm sorry. Come back home, we'll talk face to face.

Joshua

At first things were going relatively well between us, we really got on, and everything seemed real, nevertheless I feel that you don't give a damn about me anymore and frankly I don't blame you, you've got your friends, your occupations and your life to manage. I think this situation hurts me just because I tried to trust you, I opened up to you and you let me down but it's okay, I don't even know why I'm reacting like this I'm used to being made to believe things and then let go. You know what, I'd even have preferred never to get along with you like that, for us to remain simple work colleagues and not talk on the networks. And especially that I'd never fall in love with you and that we'd never be a couple.