Fight For Love (A Before You Exit Fanfic)

Chapter 13

CONNOR’S POV

I hate my dad so much right now. Why does he have to bring that up earlier while Mia’s there? I clearly know that he has an idea that I’m not really interested in Kristin and the one I want is Mia. But why did he have to mention Kristin in front of her? He knows how much it would hurt her. And he knows how much it would hurt me.

I don’t know where I’ll be heading to, I just kept on walking as I think things through. It’s my first time to be greatly affected by this because I witnessed how much it affected her too. I saw it in her eyes, I saw how much it hurt her and I swear, it hurts me twice or thrice more. I saw her broken, just by the way Kristin’s name was mentioned. And seeing her that way just makes my heart sink. She’s too precious to be broken like that.

“Connor!” I heard her familiar sweet voice just a few feet behind me. I didn’t bother to stop though. I kept on walking. She’s already hurt, and I know that she’ll be more hurt just seeing how I am right now. And I can’t afford to let that happen. I can’t believe that I’m the one who’s hurting her. I can’t believe that I’m actually hurting the one person I love the most.

I hear her footsteps nearing and I just wiped my tears immediately. “Connor.” She said again. This time she got a hold of my left arm already so I didn’t bother to walk any further. I stopped and looked down on the sidewalk.

She walked in front of me now, and I can feel her staring at me. She gently placed her hand on my chin and lifted my head up. She’s giving me that innocent look again, and I just can’t take it. She’s so caring and understanding towards me and I’m here, hurting her most of the time.

I can’t handle myself anymore so I just cried in front of her. It’s my first time to cry this hard because of all the things that are happening. She hugged me immediately and I’m still crying while we’re in a hug.  I think I’m already sobbing in her gray hoodie. So much for being strong, Connor, you just cried like a baby.

She pulled away gently and motioned me to sit on one of the benches on the sidewalk.

“Connor” She said softly while she gently wipes the tears off of my face.

It didn’t make a difference though, I just cried even harder. I can’t believe how she still remains to be this sweet and caring to me after everything I did. And somehow I don’t think I deserve her anymore. She’s like the best girl any guy could ever ask for. And what do I do? I just keep on hurting her. And she clearly doesn’t deserve that. She deserves so much better than that.

“Mia, I want you to know how much you mean to me, okay? And because of that-“ I said, but she cut me off.

“Hey” She said again with her gentle voice. “I think I know what you’re thinking. But believe me; I try my best to just ignore that fact. I don’t want to lose you just because of that.” She said, as she tries to look at me straight into my eyes. But I can’t. I can’t even afford to look straight at her.

I can tell she’s trying her best to cheer me up just by what she is saying. I want to believe her, I want to believe that she’s really okay with what’s happening to me but also, I am not that insensitive. I know she’s really affected and hurt deep inside. She just won’t admit it because she knows it will hurt me more.

“Connor.” She said, and ugh, my heart just keeps on melting every time I hear her say my name. “Please don’t do this.” She added. And this made me look up to her, and our eyes locked immediately. It made me notice that she really has beautiful brown eyes that are now shining because of the moonlight. I held her face gently with both of my hands and we just practically stared at each other the whole time. She takes hold of my hands with both of hers and she immediately broke the silence.