Beautiful Things (SeaChaos)

Part 31 - A Faint Memory

~Chilled's POV~

I... am pretty that I was in love with Adam before. Just seeing him, it makes me feel as if I really had been but considering how awkward he became when I mentioned it... maybe I'm imagining it? Or maybe it was a one sided thing I had. I stare at him as he walks away from me, a bit slowly and seeming a bit unsure of where to go next. Maybe that's why he didn't want to see me before, it would make sense except for the fact I really like girls and not dudes. Taking a deep breath I shake my head and turn around, heading back on my path to the office. There are lots of things that I have questions about but I have a feeling I'll get none of them answered in the end until I find a way to recover all of my memories. There can't be just some sort of 'remember' button or key that will just return all of my memories? Let's think about this from the beginning - it was SeaNanners who took away my memories. Maybe he is the key to finding all of my memories again, so that means I have to figure out just who he is.

Well... I'll have a shitty time with that considering no one has a clue as to who he is from all that I've gathered about him. Then again... I haven't gathered much at all about him considering he's not even one of my cases anymore... which is... curious. He was before apparently, but his information was definitely missing from all of the documents Sark had given me so there must be something involving him that is heavily involved with my personal life for the time I forgot. Entering the office like usual most people stare at me seeming very awkward and hesitant to even approach me. It's like I became some sort of curious wild animal ever since I lost my memories, it's like I'm something very strange or even pitiful, just here as an innocent animal. Retreating to my office and avoiding the stares, I sit at the desk and sigh when I stare at the computer screen, all unfamiliar files and programs on the desktop, very different from what I've become accustomed to seeing.

"Chilled, how have you been back at work?" Sark suddenly asks, entering my office when I hadn't even noticed him. I stare at him for a moment, considering possibly asking him about the things I've had questions about but then I think about it more... I believe in Sark and realize he only does what he thinks is best for every one of his detectives. If he thinks leaving me out of the Nanners case is better for me... then he won't tell me shit even if I ask for it.

"I'm fine, only a couple of headaches. You seem to be struggling more with the whole Nanners case," I mention and he seems to hesitate at my words, obviously reluctant to tell me a single word involving Nanners.

"When'd you start calling him that?" He asks and I blink... Nanners? I've always called him Nanners... or maybe I just started? "Never mind. The whole yearly party we put on is this Saturday just as a reminder. Just wear something nice," Sark says and turns when somebody else calls for him and quickly nods a farewell to me before leaving my office and returning to the main offices full of people wandering around and doing work. Glancing back down at my own work I realize I should also return to doing work but I can't do shit with my mind as distracted as it is right now. Eventually I end up pulling up files I find in our database all involving previous Nanners cases and somehow... every single one of them are faintly familiar. I'm involved in quite a few, not all of them and there is a period of time that I'm uninvolved with them completely for quite the big period of time for some reason. It makes me wonder in the end, what exactly is it that happened between all of us, not only Cathy and Adam but Miranda, Sark, Ze, the entire detective agency. Everyone seems to know something that I don't, and the subject is between Nanners and me.

Glancing over to my phone sitting on the desk I pick the small device up and glance between all of my contacts until pausing at Adam's. Suddenly a thought comes to me and I set the phone down and pull out another laptop from inside of my desk I usually use for intense investigating. Hooking up my phone to the laptop I begin to file through my phone looking for anything that would be of interest from browser history to deleted emails. Suddenly I pause when I do find a small pile of deleted text messages... all directed to and from Adam.... My fingers stop completely but my eyes and mind are very active going between all of the messages and suddenly a large wave of pain comes to my head causing me to gasp in pain and back off from the laptop. Holding my head I suddenly remember... I remember falling for Adam and his stupid laugh. Not much though, I don't remember the details of how or why I fell for him I don't really remember much about all that we've even done together, he'll I don't even remember meeting him for the first time. Is this just like only remembering what you want to remember?