Deer in the Headlights

Part 18 - Vanilla Twilight

[Brielle's POV]

I lay awake that night tossing and turning, trying fruitlessly to catch even a moment’s sleep, but no matter how hard I tried the sleep just would not come to me.

I sat up and leant against the headboard, tiredly leaning over to switch on the bedside light; my eyes stung as the room was illuminated with the bright light but after a moment they adjusted and I was able to make out the familiar setting of my bedroom.

I glanced over at the alarm clock on my bedside, it read 3:29AM, I gave an exasperated sigh.

I’d been awake all night, the constant thoughts of Dad were bubbling through my mind and with each thought I felt more and more awake. I was really worried about Dad, I know the doctors had said he was stabilised but my sleep deprived mind was taunting me with a thousand ideas of 'what could happen?' and 'what if?' I rubbed my eyes feeling worse than ever.

Tiredly I made the effort to scramble out of the bed and slip on some casual day clothes; completely giving up on the idea of sleep.

Trudging downstairs like some kind of zombie, I switched on some of the house lights and flicked on the TV as I collapsed on the couch. In reality I didn’t know why I’d put the TV on, the only things on were those cheesy midnight shows that no one bothered with. But still I kept it on, gazing lifelessly at the screen as if it all meant something.

I wondered if Adam was awake too. His insomnia I knew haunted his nights quite a lot, it must be terrible for him to feel like this, not able to fall asleep; to just be awake.

My mind wandered haphazardly as I sat there alone; for a moment I even contemplated going over to see Adam, I supposed the only thing that stopped me is that he’s at his parents’ house.

I sighed again.

What was I seriously thinking? Adam was going through his own troubles too; I couldn’t just expect him to always be there for me just because he had such a caring nature.

Getting up I walked into the kitchen, not bothering to turn the TV off which had now cut to the early morning news.

The tiled flooring was cold beneath my bare feet and it made my hair stand on end for a moment. Walking past the cupboards I drew open the curtains a fraction and looked out over the sleepy neighbourhood.

Everything was so peaceful and still, like a blanket had been put on the street enveloping it in a gentle stupor. From what I could see the sky was clear, the tiny specks of stars still shining lightly against the dark backdrop of the endless sky. Steeling myself away from the window I put on a beat up pair of converse and my trench coat before I took the keys from the bowl in the hallway. It was in that moment I happened to glance upon a dark shadow on the floor. Curiousity soon got the better of me so I stooped down to realise almost instantly that it was a brown beanie hat.

I frowned as I picked it up and stood to my full height, I was sure it wasn't mine.

It was then that it dawned on me it was Adam’s, he must have left it by accident when he'd come round to visit me a week ago. 

Without so much as a second thought I lifted it to my face and breathed in the familiar musky scent that was so obviously Adam, I smiled as I felt my stomach knotting with butterflies yet to give my nerves flight. Luckily however I was alone.

Alone in my hallway at three in the morning sniffing a hat.

I sniggered as the sarcastic voice in my head chided me. So with a little more conviction this time I put the hat on and went to look in the mirror, smiling immediately as I found delight at the contrasting brown that suited my blonde hair well.