Deer in the Headlights

Part 50 - Where Fire & Ice Collide

[Adam's POV]

A week had passed since I’d arrived home from the tour. I hadn’t seen Brielle since then, we’d hardly spoken.

Lazily casting my eyes out the kitchen window I looked out over the sunny autumn neighbourhood, painted in deep shades of orange and yellow from the dying leaves it certainly did look a nice day out. With a sigh I realised I had to talk with her.

Walking through into the hallway I quickly slipped on a black duffel coat, pausing for a moment in the mirror to look myself in the eye. There was no shirking away from this now, the man I was staring at, he had deep feelings hidden away; it was almost like looking into the face of a stranger. That man had to be brave and follow his heart.

Tearing my gaze from the mirror I solemnly took the house keys from the bowl on the hallway table and walked over to the door, with another hefty sigh I opened it.

My heart practically burst out of my chest as I almost walked straight into Brielle.

Blushing furiously I took a step back, Brielle looked equally shocked to see me but after a brief second she smiled faintly, smirking back I gulp in a deep breath of air.

“Brielle! I was just going out to see you.” She smiles a little and I watch her swallow a lump in her throat, she seemed nervous. “Come in.” I say shakily as I step aside and let her in. Shutting the door behind us I lead her into the living room.

With trembling hands I take off my coat and throw it down on the couch, Brielle watches my actions in silence, she hadn’t said a word and she hadn’t sat down either; it was with a stab of fear to my gut that I realised she’d come here to talk with me. Automatically I felt myself blushing; kicking myself mentally I smiled shyly in a poor attempt to defuse the situation.

“Is something the matter Bri?” I ask softly as I look into her eyes. She meets my gaze and shrugs her shoulders gently, for some reason I didn’t think the prospect of a talk between the two of us was all that was on her mind.

“It doesn’t matter Adam.” I frown and tilt my head slightly.

“Please tell me Bri.” I say softly, my voice full of concern. Brielle stares at me for a moment without saying a word, her cold eyes I could tell were searching mine for a sign of trust, whatever was on her mind was obviously troubling her.

“W-what...” She stops and looks away with a ragged sigh; I could tell she was annoyed that she couldn’t find the words. Looking up after a moment she fixes me dead in the eye, her gaze much stronger and solid than it was previously, in her eye was an almost wild look that made my skin crawl. “What happened between you and Taylor?”

My heart stops dead, my lip twitching with surprise.

“Nothing happened, I promise.” I say softly as I find my voice again, trying to keep my words as delicate as possible. I sensed immediately we were treading on eggshells and that one false step could ignite a bitter conflict. However despite my caution Brielle still threw me an incredulous look, her icy eyes suddenly becoming that bit hostile as she looked at me fiercely.

“C’mon Adam, what was Enchanted, she wrote that for you and you replied in kind with your own on Valentine’s Day not to mention with a letter pouring out your heart.” I grit my teeth as I struggle to hold back the anger that was beginning to rise inside me. Brielle had a right to question me but the manner in which she going about it irritated me to say the least.

Opening my mouth I attempt to speak but find the words soon vanish as I look deeply into her eyes, my feelings being tossed around like a ship at sea. With a heaving sigh I focus on her once again, pinning her to the spot with my dark eyes.

“I won’t deny what I did. You know when I met her I was terrified but over time that changed, I’ll admit I was starting to get feelings for her. When the whole Enchanted thing kicked off it felt right to do what I did, I can’t explain it other than acting on impulse but that was in the past-“

“Adam I saw the letter, so did thousands of other people and Taylor herself. I’ve known you long enough to know that you don’t do things half heartedly.” Brielle cuts in, her voice rising as bitter emotions taint her thoughts. I swallow a lump in my throat as I see her anger and feel my heart sinking.

“No. You’re right Brielle. I don’t do things half heartedly, I’d be a liar to say I wasn’t head over heels for her at the time, it felt right and I did it but those feelings are gone.” I watch with a knot in my stomach as Brielle looks at me with an expression that was fast turning to one of sadness. More than anything I longed to scoop her into my arms and comfort her, tell her it was okay, that I was sorry and I loved her. But with a sinking feeling I knew Brielle wasn’t satisfied with my answers.

“You forgot me Adam.” She whispers. My heart almost tearing in two at the statement.

“No Brielle.” I murmur. Brielle fixes me with a pained look and shakes her head miserably.

“For God’s sake Adam you could’ve had Taylor Swift, what do I matter?” She exclaims before going to turn away, stepping forward I touch her arm and bring her to a stop, Brielle looks at me with flinty eyes but doesn’t move away.

“Brielle you’re right, me and Taylor could’ve been a thing, what no one but her knows is that I had that opportunity. But you know what? I tossed that away. I cast aside all my feelings at the time, and it was because of you.” I don’t attempt to hide the pain in my voice as I stare at her hardly, she seemed to tremble beneath my gaze, her anger vanishing as I took my hand away from her arm.

“What?” She asks quietly, her voice meek and questioning.

“Brielle, Taylor asked me if we wanted to get closer. And I said no because of you.” Brielle frowns, her expression full of concern.

“Adam why?”

“Because even though I thought I was in love with her, even after all those months out touring I still didn’t understand that night between you and me. How could I love Taylor if I still had such strong feelings for you? You’re right I could’ve had Taylor but something stopped me, god damn it Brielle I probably broke her heart with what I did, singing her song, being so charming and then tearing all that down as if it was nothing. Tearing it down because in my heart I still thought of you, even though what we’d done could’ve been a crazy one night thing and that ultimately we might not have anything together, I said no despite that because I had to know the truth about us.” Brielle freezes as my words tumble out in a haphazard fashion, weeks of pain and sorrow pouring out in one bloody outburst.

“So before you give me crap about Taylor, please just know that I gave her up for you. Whether you like me or not I had to leave her to know about us.” A bitter tone fills my voice but by the time I’ve finished speaking burns out entirely, the angry fire inside flickered out of existence.

I look sadly at Brielle as she stares up at me, an unreadable expression of guilt and sadness was etched onto her pretty face. I felt sick to the stomach for shouting at her but I felt slightly better now she knew the truth.

“Adam...” Brielle whispers sadly. My bottom lip trembles as I see sadness in her eyes, I didn’t know why she was upset but the longer I stood there the more it hurt to see her like that.

Rushing past me Brielle runs out of the room and out of the house.

I sigh tiredly as I turn to watch her hurriedly walk down the street back home, her hands rubbing her eyes as she attempted to stop tears I knew would be flowing.

Inside my chest I felt my heart crying out for her, I wasn’t sure if I’d shocked Brielle with my anger or whether the truth had scared her; either way I felt entirely to blame.

Rubbing my eyes to stop the tears I let out a trembling sigh and shake my head. I felt like such a jerk and I didn’t even know why. No matter what I did I never seemed to be able to do things right around women. And now I was even further away from understanding what Brielle was thinking.

[Authors note: Plot twist? Hm nah this should iron out some unanswered questions from earlier on, Brielle wanted to know about Taylor and Adam so she could see whether Adam truly liked her or not but the argument got too much as the unexpecting truth was pulled up]