How To Save A Life: A Louis Tomlinson FanFiction

Chapter 31: Life and Death

Louis's POV:

Nurses rushed around, trying to save Bells. I sat down next to my beautiful Bells, holding her hand tightly with one hand, and holding our beautiful child with the other. I wanted to sob, but I didn't want my baby to cry as she died, so I held it in. I praid silently that they could live, not understanding why this was happening.

It wasn't a WHY ME type of thing. I wasn't worthy of either of the two dying around me. It was a why them thing... Why did the two most perfect people ever have to die. It was all my fault. How, you may ask.

Fact. Bells didn't get cancer until after I met her. Maybe it was because of me that she got it. There was no other explanation.

Fact two. This child was mine. If she was born to someone else as the father, she would probably be fine. 

EVERYTHING WAS MY FAULT! How was I supposed to go on living, knowing that the two girls I loved the most died because of me? It wasn't fair. It wasn't god damn fair. I was the bad person, not them. Why couldn't I die, why did they have to?

And Bells. Perfect Bells... As she closed her eyes, what were some of her last worries? That I needed to move on. That wasn't god damn fair. She was worried that I wouldn't move on... I- I- What was more perfect than hjer hoping that I'd move on. She was so perfect, always worrying about me. Never worrying about herself, even in her l-last breaths?... I didn't deserve her... And now she was dying, before she found the perfect guy. Well, no one was perfect enough to have her. She was the definition of perfection.

"Um sir. You're wife should be fine for now. I would focus on your baby for the moment. Your wife will last at least through the night." A doctor said.

"Oh no, she's not my-" I started to say, but then just nodded. My wife... I wonder if I'd be able to call her that someday... I wonder if she'd live long enough....

I made a deal with myself. If she woke up, I would ask her to marry me, because then, at least, we could be engaged for a little while. Maybe she'd even live... I held onto that hope...

For the moment, I acted like Bells was okay. I acted like she was just in the other room, not dying in front of me. I acted like she was fine, and focused on my baby.

I smiled sadly at my daughter. "I'm so sorry, baby. Daddy's sorry." I whispered, as she held my pinky in her tiny fist. She was so perfect. I wondered what her laugh would be like...

"Nurse?" I whispered to the nurse who was just walking in. She smiled at me. "Could you take this camera and take a picture of my baby girl and I?" I asked, and she did.

I smiled wide, and while I was very sad, looking at my beautiful child made my smile real. The nurse snapped the picture. I tickled my daughter's toes, making her giggle. A tear escaped my eye, as I heard her giggle. It was just like her mother's... And now I'd never hear either laugh again....

The nurse snapped another picture of her giggling. I leaned forward, fixing Bells's hair, laughing crazily as I thought how mad she'd be if I took a picture of her and her hair wasy 'messed up.' I always thought she looked perfect, anyways... I laid the baby in her arms, and we snapped another picture of our baby. I hopped into the picture, so it was the three of us. And that was the final picture of my baby alive...

I picked up our baby, and I listened as her breaths became slower and shorter. A sob escaped me. "No......." I whispered, as my baby closed her eyes slowly. And then her breathing stopped completely.

I fell to my knees, realizing that my baby was dead. D-dead.... "NOOOOO!!!!!!!!" I screamed, and I felt my baby being taken from my hands. I fell completely to the ground and sobbed. I don't know how long I laid there, probably hours, crying and not responding to anyone or anything.