How To Save A Life: A Louis Tomlinson FanFiction

Chapter 22: Die In Your Arms

Lou's Pov:

And just like that, she walked away. I felt as her hand slipped out of mine in front of me, tears rushing down her face, and she turned around, and walked away. Do you know what it's like to see the love of your life crying, because of you? Let me tell you, it's hell.

At first I was angry. I kept thinking WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME? I MAKE ME SOOO EASY TO LOVE! (song in multimedia) I was pissed. I kept thinking of how I try so hard to make her love me, and then she just left. And then I turned to sadness...

I could have argued, tried to make her stay, convince her I was a moron, who didn't know what I was saying, but like me, she was stubborn. Her mind was set, and she'd never come back. She'd never come back to me....

I realized, in that moment, what Bell's dad felt like all those years. His love never to come back, I'd want to die. He stayed for his daughter, waited long enough so that she wouldn't have to go to foster care, took drugs and alcohol to ease the pain. It may seem like an easy way out, but in reality, it was the hardest thing ever. To live, when you just wanted to die all the time. In that moment, I gained respect for Bell's dad. Sure, what he did to her was terrible, and you could never justify it, but I guess I understand why he did. Not the whole beating Bells, but the drugs. He beat Bells while he couldn't think, if he knew what he was doing, he would have stopped. But I understood his life now... I just wanted the easy way out... I wanted to die. I watched as Bell walked away, walked out of my life. I didn't have someone to stay around for. Sure, I had a family, but Lottie and the rest had eachother. It wasn't like Bells, who had no one. I didn't need to stay around for anyone. Bells was gone, so I just wanted to die.

Funny, she walked out of my life, and I was going to walk out of my life too. I fell to my knees, tears rushing down my face. I sobbed uncontrollably. I picked up my gun, my hand trembling from me crying from my broken heart, and cried Bell's name once more, just to feel her name in my mouth once more before I died. She was far enough away not to see the messiness. She wouldn't care anyways, I was just another jerk in her life now.

Lets stop for a second. I understand that you're probably like 'God, you soooo overreacting. It's just some girl, get over it. It's not worth killing yourself over. But you don't understand. Once you meet the one, your sole mate, true love, whatever you want to call it, no matter how perfect your life was before, you can't recover once you loose the perfect girl. You're life becomes her, and once she leaves, your life is gone. You have no reason to live left.

I was such an ass. She was my reason for living, and now she was gone. My reason to live was gone, and soon so would my life... I raised the gun to my head and tightened my finger's grip around the trigger. Nothing happened.

Dammit. I forgot to cock it. I cocked the gun, the noise louder than I expected. I closed my eyes, putting the gun up to my head again. I slowly tightened my finger, again...

And then bam...

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Eliza's Pov:

I turned around, walking away, my heart breaking. Maybe I was overreacting. I knew he didn't mean it, He was just being over protective. But I felt truth in his words. I was so used to these things happening that they weren't that big of a deal... I didn't realize what an effect they'd have on those around me. I must have been ruining Lou's life with stress from it all.

I heard Lou scream out my name, like a puppy being ran over, and it took all I had to keep walking. They tell you not to look back, because then you'll just come rushing back. It's true, if I looked back, I'd never be able to leave Lou.

I kept walking, stumbling as I went, when I heard it. A loud click. I'd heard that noise before, when I was little, with my grandfather. That was the sound of cocking a gun.... Lou's gun...

He wasn't going to shoot me, was he? No. He's too perfect for that. There was one more option.

I flew around, to see Lou, eyes closed, with a gun to his head. I screamed, but he zoned everything out. They tell you not to look back for a reason, but now I know, it's not always the right reason. Follow your heart, not your mind. Your heart tells you the right thing to do.

And my heart was screaming SAVE HIM! I sprinted back to Lou. I stumbled. He tightened his grip on the gun trigger. I wasn't going to make it. I sprinted as hard as I could. And I made it...

I slid to the ground, slamming my lips to his, shoving his hand out of the way with mine. He couldn't die, not yet, not before me, not because of me... But I heard the gun go off... Oh god....

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Lou's Pov:

BAM! A body slammed into mine, knocking my hand away from my head, lips crashing into mine, lips.... I knew those lips.... Bell....

She loved me! It was okay, she still loved me, even through all my mistakes... She still loved me, my life was worth living.

But she was too late... My finger had pushed too hard... The gun went off... A pain rushed through my stomach... The bullet went there instead of my head.... I felt Bells pull back, her eyes flared with worry. Her hands flew to my stomach, checking what happened. Then she called the ambulance. Tears rushed down her face.

It was a weird feeling. Being shot with pain, literally, while at the same time, my heart mended because of the kiss. Somehow, the mending overcame the pain... I could have just stayed there, kissing her, as I died, and I don't even think I would have noticed the pain. She loved me, and that's all that mattered.

"I'm so sorry, Lou. I love you. I need you, don't die on me. What were you thinking?! Killing yourself?! You idiot! I would have come back! Why in the world would you resort to killing yourself! I'm not that important! I just need you to survive... Live... please live... I'll do anything, I'll never bother you, I'll die, I'll love you forever, I'll marry you, whatever you want, just live.. Look at the sky Lou, isn't it gorgeous? I just love the sky! Don't you want to live there?" She said, emotions running through in her voice. From sadness, to anger, to bargaining, to just down right going insane. I guess the idea of me dying pushed her over the edge at the end. Wow, I almost feel important, knowing that. She sobbed, whispering that everything was going to be fine.

"I think the sky is saying something Lou, it's speaking. It is saying that we'll be alright. We'll be fine, Lou. You'll live, we'll go somewhere nice. Get married, have kids. I'll do anything for you..." She sobbed. God, I was the reason for this. She was crying because of me... I felt like I deserved to die just because I made her cry.

Funny, how I felt that I deserved to die, and in reality, I actually was dying... haha! I felt as blood gurgled up in to my mouth, as I coughed, spraying blood on my shirt. So this was how it felt to die. It wasn't as bad as you would think, dying in the arms of someone you love. It's actually a perfect death. This is how I'd die. Can you put that on my grave stone? Louis Tomlinson, died in the arms of the one he loved... Isn't that like a Justin Bieber song? Die In Your Arms? Oh god, I hang out with Lottie to much...

I felt as the life ran out of me, my body going limp in Bell's arms, her tears falling on my skin... I heard as the sirens filled my ears... "If I could just die in your arms..." I coughed, blood gurgling up again. "I...wouldn't....mind.." I whispered to Bells, and then everything went black.

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A/N: Yeah yeah, short chapter, yell at me, go ahead, I understand. But as always, I love my cliff hangers. Louis dies? Say what? in his own fanfic? I understand that you hate me right now, and feel free to scream, cuss, and rage on me in the comments. Also, if someone cusses, PLEASE don't report the comment. I find this extremely annoying, they aren't trying to be offensive... If I think its inappropriate, i'll report it. and finally, the song is Die In Your Arms, hope you like it. I'm not a big JB fan, but this song fit so well, I just had to add it...

thanks, love ya!

-Gretchen

also, I was writing this yesterday. I actually was going to wait like 3 days to publish it, but then on accident I published it yesterday, and deleted it. So then I felt bad to tease you and make you wait 3 days, so instead, you waited 1 day. so you are welcome for the quick update. I wanted you to wait, and freak out over what was going to happen next, but of course, I messed up.. damn. well you're welcome.