Until The Whole World Hears?

Chapter: 21: Memory Lane

          “Hey, Ava I was thinking that for our next meeting I can introduce to everybody a fundraiser, to help us make enough money to go to Ireland … It’s really expensive.”

          I could hear Sara say waiting for me to respond, but whatever she said soon went out my other ear, because at the moment my thoughts spoke louder than her words.

          “Ava?” She called me again, while putting her bag over her shoulder. I watch as Vivia and Laden exit out the room together with everyone else when time for the club ending time came. When she was completely out of the room was able to refocus on what was going around me and I look to Sara.

          Her face was calm but questioning …

          “I’m so sorry, Sara.” I say, slapping my forehead with my hand.

          “What were you saying, I was distracted …” I say apologetically.

          “I can see that.” She says with a sympathetic laugh. I smile politely.

          “I was just saying, for our next meeting I can introduce to everybody a fundraiser, to help us make enough money to go to Ireland.” She repeated.

          “Right!” I say shaking my head in agreement.

          “I’ll ask Ms. Kinney, first thing tomorrow morning.” I add.

          “Great, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said, waving and I did the same until she was out the room.

          Could it be possible that Vivia is cutting again? I ask myself. The thought gave me goose bumps and a worried heart. I hope there’s a really good explanation for this, I don’t want to have to get into protective friend mode and have to convince her to tell her parents what she has done, before it becomes a serious problem.

 

          “I got home late one night and I called her name to see if she was still awake, and when I heard no respond I thought she had fallen asleep.” She said sadly look down at her hands to keep herself from making eye contact.

          “I had a feeling that something wasn’t right from the minute I stepped into the house … But I assumed I was just spooked from the hallowing prank my co-workers pulled on me.” She said shaking her head, smiling, and then the smile slowly faded as she continued.

          “After freshening up for bed I was going to say a prayer but I decided I wanted to go check up on Vivia first. Sometimes she would pass out and fall asleep before even getting a blanket to keep warm … I came into her room and saw that she wasn’t sleeping on her bed, where I expected to find her … I called her name and no response … Then I saw a light in her bathroom on and I knocked on the door, and no response … I open the door and there she was …Her pale face laying in the tub and it look as if  her life has been drained out of it. I walk closer to her to see long gashes on her arm with blood still pouring out.”

          Vivia’s mother covered her hand with her mouth and let out a weeping noise that even with her hand over her mouth you still could hear it ringing in your ears.

          Pastor Jimmy laid a hand on her shoulder and begins to rub her back comforting her. Tears streamed down her eyes and Pastor Jimmy handed her a tissue, even though she looked as if she couldn’t go on, she did.

          “After rushing her to the emergency room, I started to judge rather if I was even worthy of being called a mother … Was it because I spent more time working then making time to spend with her?, did she feel like it was her father leaving all over again?”

          “Ava? Its past school lock down time, what are you still doing here?” Asked the Janitor.

          “Oh, sorry, just got caught up …” I say getting my school bag to get going.

          Crimson red fills the bowl and I think I'm going to be sick.

With everything spinning so fast I cannot breath.

Walls closing in and everything fades.

Flashes of light come by, one, by one.

Feeling sleepy not knowing your name.

Not knowing mine.

There it is. My favorite thing of all this,

ah the feeling of pain is gone from before and new form enters me.

Lying here waiting for you to come home.

I open my eyes and see flashes of you and me from before you went.

You walk inside.

You call to me and wait for an answer.

You hear small light breaths coming from the bathroom.

Thinking it is me, you walk down the hall with a smile.

The kind that makes your knees go week.

You walk in. Oh God is all you can think.

I'm trying to look up at you but I can’t move.

A cold chill comes over me as you pick me up.

You say we are going to the hospital and that everything will be ok.

You rush me in.

Blood running down.

The nurse rushes you to a bed so I can lie down.

I can hear you asking her something.

But I can't make out the words.

I feel something cold and wet touch my face then my arm.

I feel the prick of a sharp object go in my right arm.

The nurse says that I need stitches because the wound is too deep.

I feel the thread go in and out through my arm.

And a band-aid go around and around.

After I have slept for two days they let you in.

I can move again and open my eyes.

You say that I got 76 stitches because the cuts were way to deep.

And that I almost died.

I pull off the band-aid and look.

I see over 20 cuts and begin to cry.

You tell me it’s ok and we will get some help

~ Kassie